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Archive for September, 2005

Caption Competition

30 September, 2005 at 9:06 pm by belgianwaffle

The Princess went to see her subjects (or co-princes) in the hospital again. The visit passed off without incident (only because we hid the thermometer).

Caption competition: what is Princess doing to baby Michael ? And what is he saying? A sweetie for the best caption…

Comments
sungirltan
on 30 September 2005 at 21:33
‘what’s this hole for?’

formerfilmexpert
on 30 September 2005 at 22:14
Does this make his hands move?
Kathy
(Homepage)
on 30 September 2005 at 23:03
I thought it was baby Michael talking:
“Oh, great. Here comes that kid who sticks his finger in my ear. Yeah, come on, buddy. Keep it up. One day I’ll have motor control, you know.”

Kathy
(Homepage)
on 30 September 2005 at 23:04
Waahhh!!! I wasn’t paying attention. Of course it’s more like:
“Oh, great. here comes that kid who sitcks HER finger in my ear. Yeah, come on Princess, keep it up. One day I’ll have motor control, you know. And don’t you try to kiss me, either. Blech.”

kristin
on 02 October 2005 at 21:54
Princess: [in american gangster voice] “This is my sceptre, see? And if you and your little double don’t do what i tell you to, i’ll put it in your ear like this, see? So youse better do what i tell you to.”
Prince: ‘Oy! Oy!’
Sarcastic Journalist
(Homepage)
on 03 October 2005 at 05:17
Princess: “And this, Michael, is how babies are made.”
Michael: “That’s not quite how I remember it.”
geepeemum
on 03 October 2005 at 10:21
“But daddy I need to get my sweet back out.” (if only I could type that in French…)

kristin
on 03 October 2005 at 17:28
does this help?
Mais, Papa! J’ai besoin de ma doucette!
(i’m sure that’s wrong. how do you say candy in french?)
Peggy
(Homepage)
on 04 October 2005 at 09:44
Sweet in French would be “mon bonbon” never heard of “doucette” before (is that Canadian French?).
Caption competition “ET phone home”.

belgianwaffle
on 06 October 2005 at 14:21
Gosh you’re all very clever…after much deliberation here in Waffle towers we have decided to award the sweetie to geepeemum. Congratulations on your extraordinary good fortune.

Locotes
on 06 October 2005 at 15:00
I know the competition is over – but I’ve put a LOT of thought into this – and I believe the exact utterances were…

Princess: “Tee hee”
Michael: “Feck off”

a href=”http://www.20six.co.uk/belgianwaffle”>belgianwaffle
on 10 October 2005 at 08:56
Oh Loc, a winner if only submitted on time.

First Contact

28 September, 2005 at 9:28 pm by belgianwaffle

Waffle Palace tonight announced that the Princess had paid a courtesy call on her new subjects. She prononced herself pleased, and deigned to kiss them on leaving. Although only 36 hours old, the
new princes have caught on to court etiquette quickly: they have given her a number of presents every day, which may have helped them gain acceptance. A diplomatic incident theatened when the Princess attempted to retake possession of her turtle-shaped bath thermometer, but courtiers were able to smooth
things over…

Mrs W was pleased with the way it went, and also very grateful for all the kind comments and sweeties.

Comments

Bobble
on 28 September 2005 at 22:10
Ooh I have just received some sweetie largess to give to our 20Six new Mums! But it won’t let me give it to you. Be back later *shakes fist at system*
Minkleberry
on 29 September 2005 at 07:55
what a gracious princess
poggle
on 29 September 2005 at 11:05

Just make sure you hide the dolls’ pram – we used to steal my baby sister when Mum wasn’t looking ….. mind you, we always brought her back eventually.

Jordana
(Homepage)
on 29 September 2005 at 13:26
Congratulations!!! My Internet goes down for a day, and look what I miss. 🙂 I have no sweeties to give, but if I did, I would give them all to you for judicious dispersal among the Princess and her subjects.
May you have joyful days and restful nights.

Locotes
on 29 September 2005 at 14:50
Serves me right for not spending every waking hour on 20six waiting for updates – I go and miss the main event. Well many many congratulations, you seem to have done a fine job there.
(and congrats to Mr. W as well – ignore whatever herself might say, your role in this was just as important!)
😉

Looking forward to weary posts about sleepless nights…

Lilo
on 29 September 2005 at 21:52
Congratulations to the Waffle family. I hope you’re getting enough sleep.

Bobble
on 29 September 2005 at 23:16
At last I can give a sweetie x

gracehart
on 30 September 2005 at 02:32
Lots of blessings to the royal family!! ^^

belgianwaffle
on 06 October 2005 at 14:18
Thank you kindly for sweeties and good wishes. I feel exceptionally popular!

Happy birthday boys

27 September, 2005 at 7:31 pm by belgianwaffle

Mrs Waffle asked me to tell the world that we had two baby boys (Daniel and Michael) today, Tuesday 27 September. One is 3 kilos (about 6 pounds 11 ounces) and 51 cm – the other a more svelte 2.2kilos (5 pounds) and 48 cm. Apparently, this is within the range of normal for twins (we’d probably know this if we ever got time to read our scary twins book). Mrs W. is tired but happy.

Comments

kitschenette

(Homepage)

on 27 September 2005 at 19:39

congratulations!! wow, that’s a lot of baby you were carrying. hope you are all well and happy. ���

underbrella

on 27 September 2005 at 19:50
(
Comment Modified) Awwwww! Well done Mrs W. That’s a lot of baby to carry around. Best wishes to you all.
ESM 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

NorahSplog

on 27 September 2005 at 20:02

Oh my goodness! Wow and congrats and wow and well done and awwwwwwww. Did I mention wow? 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

Minkleberry

on 27 September 2005 at 20:20

Fabulous! And little whoppers too. Congrats to you all and much admiration of the hero of the day Mrs W. 2
Sweetie(s) given ���

Friar Tuck

on 27 September 2005 at 20:35

Congratulations! They look like little angels. Princess is about to start a whole new phase of her education–sibling relations. ���

theinsider

(Homepage)

on 27 September 2005 at 20:37

Congratulations. 🙂 They’re adorable. ���

Sarcastic Journalist

(Homepage)

on 27 September 2005 at 21:19

CONGRATS!!! Oh, smell their precious little baby heads for me! ���

beachhutman

on 27 September 2005 at 21:33

Delighted for you all.
When’s the party? 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

jackdalton

on 27 September 2005 at 23:32

Excellent! Fantastic! And special congrats to Princess on becoming a Big Sister 😉 2
Sweetie(s) given ���

[anonymous]

on 28 September 2005 at 00:47

Fantastic! Huge congratulations to all of you! xxx 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

kristin

on 28 September 2005 at 05:49

What fabulous news. Congrats to all, and special kisses to Princess Waffle and the new Princes. So glad to hear Mrs. Waffle is doing well.
xo ���

dmts

on 28 September 2005 at 06:40

How wonderful – absolutely fantastic news. They look so gorgeous and lovely. 2
Sweetie(s) given ���

Angela

(Homepage)

on 28 September 2005 at 09:12

Hooray! Such precious babies. Daniel and Michael. Absolutely perfect!
Congratulations to you!!! ���

Floatykatja

on 28 September 2005 at 10:12

Oh, hurray and congratulations! 1
Sweetie(s) given ���

geepeemum

on 28 September 2005 at 10:45

CONGRATULATIONS! What brilliant sizes. They look beautiful. 1
Sweetie(s) given ���

poggle

on 28 September 2005 at 10:55

Oh – how fabulous! Congrats all round. And here’s also to Big Sis. 2
Sweetie(s) given ���

SoCheap

on 28 September 2005 at 11:26

Awwwww, they’re adorable. Best wishes to the whole family. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

newshoes

on 28 September 2005 at 11:38

Horrah! 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

Kate_Sith

on 28 September 2005 at 11:41

Wonderful news! Congratulations all round. 2
Sweetie(s) given ���

chintzybling

on 28 September 2005 at 11:46

Great news! They look gorgeous – and great names! x 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

LondonMom

on 28 September 2005 at 12:44

Well done Mrs W and family – its deux garcons then!!!!! ���

JoJo

on 28 September 2005 at 12:54

beautiful, beautiful…looks like princess has bagged herself two handsome brothers there! Well done Mrs. W and warm congratulations to all the family.
JoJo & 20six Team xxx
One sweetie each! 2
Sweetie(s) given ���

lauren35

on 28 September 2005 at 13:17

How wonderful! Such good timing too. Congratulations. 1
Sweetie(s) given ���

cha0tic

on 28 September 2005 at 14:13

Congratulations to all at the royal palace. I hope The Queen Waffle is recovering well. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

sungirltan

on 28 September 2005 at 14:17

oh no – i’ve gone all broody. But look at them!! 1
Sweetie(s) given ���

Peggy

(Homepage)

on 28 September 2005 at 14:54

F?licitations!!!
Boy, Mrs Waffle must feel a lot less heavy now. 😉
You did a very good job, they look adorable. ���

Friar Tuck

on 28 September 2005 at 16:25

Congratulations! They look like little angels. Princess is about to start a whole new phase of her education–sibling relations. ���

UndercoverCookie

on 28 September 2005 at 16:45

Waffle – congratulations and congratulations. And I’m soooo pleased you even posted a pic for us to all coo over. Now rest as much as you can get away with. Herself is going to really enjoy bossing her two new brothers about. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

KateEvans

on 28 September 2005 at 16:53

Congratulations! They’re beautiful. I’m off to have a good old cry now. 2
Sweetie(s) given ���

sus

on 28 September 2005 at 22:31

Congratulations! CUTE! 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

midwifemuse

on 29 September 2005 at 12:00

Congratulations! Wonderful! 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

Dutch Mama

on 29 September 2005 at 15:51

They’re gorgeous. Congratulations from the Dutch Mama and co. ���

beachhutman

on 30 September 2005 at 20:28

In the UK it is now forbidden to coo over babies, OK? Good thing you’re in Yooorope 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

belgianwaffle

on 06 October 2005 at 13:54

OOOH thank you all very much. And a sweetie bonanza too. My loving husband printed out your comments and brought them into hospital to me. I was most touched and pleased. Thank you. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

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26 September, 2005 at 10:07 am by belgianwaffle

Letter which appeared in the Irish Times last Saturday September 24, 2005 [My translations in square brackets].

Women, work
and the home

“Madam, – Níl
aon tinteán mar do thinteán fein. [Irish phrase meaning there’s no place like home, literally, no fireplace like your own fireplace]. Of course,
an tinteán is fast receding into fadó fadó [long, long ago], but the profound verity that is the
essence of the seanfhocal [Irish phrase] will always be the truth of the human condition. More heart than hearth, it is a
humano-spiritual rather than physical structure, a warm cocoon enveloping the
very chrysalis of human society. To grow
into it and out of it is the natural right of every person.

However –
and indeeed, however well – non-parental childcare is funded, an tinteán is not
to be found in creche or kindergarten, pre-school or after school, and hardly
in a couple of nightly hours of “quality time”.

Many women,
perhaps most women, now want to “work”, i.e. to go every day to a workplace and
to take part in everything that passes there.

To
acknowledge readily that most of them work very well is not to forget that a
woman feels scant deference to logic and is wont to express the truth in such
an oblique way that it is scarcely recognisable. Thus, the true statement, “I want to go to
work” is instead expressed as “I need to go to work”; “I can’t afford not to go
to work”; “the ends that I think should meet cannot be made to meet unless I go
to work”; “I must go to work to provide adequately for my children”; or, even,
“my children will be better off by being without me for most of their daylight
hours”.

I feel sure
that an tinteán will continue to recede until women of some future generation
become so alive to their own deprivation that they will resolve that their
children must be preserved from tinteán-deprivation.

-Yours etc.

Frank
Farrell
Lakelands
Close
Stillorgan
Co. Dublin”

Comments

jackdalton

on 26 September 2005 at 13:07

Don’t sweat it, girls: Frank is a well-known ‘commentator’ on these and other social issues. And has his own unique insights to offer, naturally.
SPUC: an Gaeilge: what everyone else should do about their vile unIrish life and ways; the evils of computers in schools…agus mar sin de…
What I can’t understand is why the Times keeps giving him space. 0
Sweetie(s) given

geepeemum

on 26 September 2005 at 19:55

He’s obviously VERY bored. We must think of something to occupy his time. Any one know any JW’s who live near him? 0
Sweetie(s) given

jackdalton

on 26 September 2005 at 22:06

JW’s? See…. this is more of it — another woman who offers scant deference to logic and is wont to express the truth in such an oblique way! How is a tinte?n-deprived digital journeyman to cope with all this. 😉 0
Sweetie(s) given

poggle

on 27 September 2005 at 11:16

I bet Frank’s single and childless. 0
Sweetie(s) given

jackdalton

on 27 September 2005 at 15:48

And this is an absolute disqualification from life, Ms Pog? 😉 0
Sweetie(s) given

poggle

on 27 September 2005 at 15:53

Single, childless and writing silly pompous letters like that? Yes, I think so, Doc. It’s the combination, you see. (I would assume the same if it was a woman writing along the same lines (and yes, I am also both).) 0
Sweetie(s) given

jackdalton

on 27 September 2005 at 23:10

ahh the combination’s the thing. Right. Would agree absolutely so… 🙂 0
Sweetie(s) given

poggle

on 28 September 2005 at 10:38

Phew. Think I got away with that one …..
Ahem. 😉 0
Sweetie(s) given

jackdalton

on 28 September 2005 at 12:33

hmmm… 0
Sweetie(s) given

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26 September, 2005 at 9:58 am by belgianwaffle

She rang me at 8.30 the other morning after a
night out. As she rang off I said, in older
sister mode, now go to bed. “Oh no” said
she “I must book my tickets for Toronto”.

Me: What’s happening in Toronto?

Her: You don’t want to know.

Me: Tell
me.

Her:
Well, I’m going to a David Gray concert.

Me: Why don’t any of these people ever come to Chicago?

Her:
Well, actually, he is coming to Chicago.

Me: What?

Her (defensively): Well, I bought the Toronto tickets when I thought I might not
be able to get tickets for Chicago.

Me: But
now you actually have Chicago tickets.

Her: Well, yes.

Me: But you’re still going to Toronto.
Profligate.

In her defence, she does have a friend who
lives in Toronto, but she’s still profligate.
]]>

25 September, 2005 at 8:01 pm by belgianwaffle

Also, we have nearly sold our car. A man came to test drive it on
Saturday and fell in love with it. I didn’t meet him, but Mr.
Waffle thought he was dodgy. He said that he was a private
detective and he needed a new car urgently as his last one exploded
while he was tailing someone on the job. And he was very
keen. Mr. Waffle agreed a price and then became depressed.
He felt that we were ignorant foreigners being taken for a ride and we
would be paid, if at all, in counterfeit notes. And he pointed
out, when the man rang on the phone, he never said his name, a
suspicious sign, he thought. Professional idiosyncracy, I
decided. Anyway he turned up this morning to pay the deposit with
his wife and daughter in tow and it all seemed a little less
dodgy. It’s funny to think that, if all goes well, our
little car will be out and about tailing errant spouses or whatever it
is private detectives do in Belgium. The only problem now is
logistical. Before we can close the sale we have to all kinds of
technical things and this may not be a great week for us to take the
car for tests and hand it over. Oh well, doubtless everything
will work out.

And finally, even as I write, Mr. Waffle is picking my mother up from
the airport. She is going to stay with us for 10 days to provide
moral support to the Princess and more practical support for us.
Hurray for mothers. Of course, now I’m worried that the twins won’t
actually be born before she leaves.

Comments

beachhutman

on 26 September 2005 at 22:21

When I was a teacher in Africa (is there no END to where BHM has been?) I was confronted daily with mixed classes of fifty African teenagers, some of whom felt compelled to remove their tops in the heat. Yes, girls too. It was AWFUL I tell you Bloodnock, awful!.
Anyway, as I was saying, one day something happened when I was writng on the board, and I turned round and demanded who had done it in a truly scholmasterly way. And several of the pupils pointed to the culprit, and to this day I remember their cry, “It was him, Mister, the black one!”
So there. Even coloured kids notice colours. “They’re colourblind at that age” say the PC brigade. Total, absolute, fur trimmed, bollocks. It’s just that they don’t know that colour’s at all significant – THAT they learn from adults. 0
Sweetie(s) given

poggle

on 27 September 2005 at 11:14

Oooh – did the detective have a waxed moustache? And spats? How exciting.
(And I expect the Princess was indeed confused by the the white parent/black child combo, and not anything more than that …). 0
Sweetie(s) given

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25 September, 2005 at 5:06 pm by belgianwaffle

It’s one of these chain mail thingies.

“A woman, while at
the funeral of her own mother, met a man she didn’t know. She thought
this guy was amazing, so much her dream guy, that she believed him to be
just that! She fell in love with him right there, but never asked for
his number and couldn’t find him. A few days later she killed her
sister.

Question: What is her motive in killing her
sister?
Answer: She was hoping that the guy would appear at the funeral again.
If you answered this correctly, you think like a psychopath. This was a
test by a famous American Psychologist used to test if one has the same
mentality as a killer . Many arrested serial killers took part
in the test and answered the question correctly. If you didn’t answer
the question correctly good for you.”

I tried this on my husband. He said “because the guy she fell in love with was the funeral director”
Me: Of course, not, then she’d have had his name and number.
Him: OK, I give up.
Me: Cos she was hoping he’d come to the funeral. It’s ok, you don’t have the mentality of a psychopath.
Him (indignantly): But that’s what I was getting at.
Me: OK, you have the mentality of a not very bright psychopath.

Comments

belgianwaffle

on 26 September 2005 at 09:55

Yes, though not me, of course. 0
Sweetie(s) given

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25 September, 2005 at 4:58 pm by belgianwaffle

Me: Um guy who went to the antartic with Shakleton?
Him: No, hero of the war of independence. From Tipperary. (Pause). I think you’re thinking of Tom Crean.]]>

Morning Tribulations

25 September, 2005 at 4:52 pm by belgianwaffle

Since we got back from holidays, I’’ve spent a lot of time at home communing with my couch. Saintly Mr. Waffle has taken the Princess in and out to the creche. This is a bit stressful for him because it means that his working hours are somewhat curtailed. Friday morning was particularly trying. He couldn’’t sleep and arose at 5.15 to do some work (I know, extraordinary and somewhat alarming dedication). Madam woke at 7.15. Following a lengthy breakfast, some story reading, a little drawing, some dancing and some running around the house to get her dressed, she and Mr. Waffle finally left for the creche at 9.00. I thought that he was going to have a heart attack. I may have mentioned that I am married to the only punctual Irish man and he really HATES being late for work. I heaved a sigh of relief. Two minutes later, an upset husband and a serene toddler re-entered the premises. Apparently, no sooner had she sat into the car than she announced “I want to do a poo”. I sat her on the pot with some trepidation; if she doesn’’t produce this poo, we could all die horribly. You will be delighted to hear that all was well and at 9.15, a mere four hours after getting up, my loving spouse was able to depart for work.

24 September, 2005 at 1:03 pm by belgianwaffle

People keep congratulating me on not having
delivered earlier. I suppose they are
just trying to say something nice. But it is odd. I mean, I presume no one who gives birth at
31 weeks actually wants to and it’s really just the luck of the draw. I
suppose, if anyone deserves credit, it’s my loving husband who has done
the lion’s share of the childminding (tiring, back breaking work) for
the latter stages of this pregnancy.

People keep congratulating Mr. Waffle on his
virility as well as though having twins is an indication of superior
sperm. Odd. I mean, if anyone deserves credit here, it’s my genes and my eggs.

Conversation with spouse this morning.

Me: How will I keep my knees warm when the
twins are born?

Him: Eh?

Me: Well now my stomach keeps them nice and
toasty when I sit down.

Him:
Twin on each knee?

And finally, the
physio described giving birth to twins. Apparently baby 1 is
delivered as normal. Baby 2 tends to move around with all that
extra room. So the body often comes out first and, this is the
fun bit, it’s important that none of the medical team touches the baby
because that would trigger its startle reflex and it is not easy to
deliver a baby with its arms stretched out. So they all take a
step back and often put their hands behind their backs. I’m glad
I knew that in advance.

Comments

jackdalton

on 24 September 2005 at 14:18

That works in a lot of situations — the hands behind the back bit; dealing with transition year guards, or with pimpled Kevins in banks, or with loud & foul-mouthed, over-aggressive, overprotective male parents who go psychotic because your dog is within 8ft of their priceless addition to the human species, dealing with error 404s without prejudicing the future working capability of your laptop… the list goes on. 0
Sweetie(s) given

amerly

on 24 September 2005 at 17:31

Do you reckon they got your dates right? 0
Sweetie(s) given

KateEvans

on 25 September 2005 at 02:07

Oh, this is so exciting! How long will they let you wait over there before inducing? Is there a cut-off point, or do they just wait until you can’t walk anymore?

As we’re stuck solidly in breech, I’ll have to have a caesarian (Oct 3), so we don’t get all the fun of waiting and wondering – which I really do think looks like fun. 0
Sweetie(s) given

Minkleberry

on 25 September 2005 at 07:06

oooooh belg xx 0
Sweetie(s) given

dmts

on 25 September 2005 at 14:25

Where are you? x 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 25 September 2005 at 16:51

SGT, sorry about that.
JD, yes, I can see that.
Amerly, I suppose it’s not exactly a precise science, so maybe.
KE, am seeing doc tomorrow so I may have a better idea then. Fear she may make me wait another week.
Minks, HJB, still here. 0
Sweetie(s) given

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23 September, 2005 at 3:39 pm by belgianwaffle

One of the many excellent things about giving
birth in the kingdom of the Belgians is that it is standard practice to go to a
physiotherapist for ante and post natal classes and the physiotherapist attends
the birth.

Yesterday I attended a class. Usually I go to a French speaking class,
partly because I think that the physio is clearer in French but mostly because
it panders to my notions about myself. Anyhow,
at the French speaking class it’s a mixture of people who have had children
before and first timers but, for whatever reason, at the English speaking
class, they were all first timers. Oh
how superior I felt.

Here are some reasons why. Irish woman, due on the day of the class “is
there a birthing pool in the hospital?”
Frankly, lady, if you want to go down this route, do you really think
that it’s a good idea to ask about it for the first time on your due date? In fact, I happen to know that the only
birthing pool in Belgium is in Ostend (please do not ask how I came by
this arcane knowledge), so it was really far, far too late for this. Meanwhile the physio had understood “birthing
pillow” and responded that there were dozens.
Mild confusion.

Slightly smug American lady asked the physio
“do you believe in the epidural?”. Given
that 96% of births in Belgium are with epidurals, I’m betting
that she does. Seeing is believing.

Physio explained that she would come to the
hospital after the birth to do exercises and then, after a couple of weeks at
home, we should start coming back to classes.
Finnish woman asks “why don’t we go back to classes immediately after
coming out of hospital?”. Physio says
tactfully that this can be a tiring time.
“But” persists the Finnish woman “we can do them at home?” “Yes, you can do them at home”. “But” I’m thinking “you may prefer to use
that time to shower”.

Yes, I was irredeemably smug. Boy, am I riding for a fall.

Comments

NorahSplog

on 23 September 2005 at 16:06

Oooh – pet hate alert! “do you believe in” instead of “are you in favour of”. Ngggg. 0
Sweetie(s) given

kristin

on 23 September 2005 at 17:26

note to FT, i am american, and in no way smug (tho clearly, quite defensive, lol). And I ws so in favor of the epidural i had it at 3 cm.
Dear Mrs. Waffle, i am in awe of your fortitude, still going to prenatal classes. I am putting up my feet in hopes you will follow my lead.
xo

StarCorner

on 23 September 2005 at 19:43

I think at this stage, you are more than entitled to be smug m’dear!! Best of luck for the big day … whenever it arrives! 0
Sweetie(s) given

JoJo

on 23 September 2005 at 23:06

Absolutely agree with Star on this one – if you don’t deserve to be smug I don’t know who does. 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 24 September 2005 at 12:53

FT, yes, excellent new age deity.
Norah, please write a blog entry on this! I’d enjoy that and I need to be humoured.
Kristen, FT is an American also, so he is entitled to be a bit sarky. Most of the Americans I know are not smug at all, no for a nation of smug souls, you need the Dutch.
Star, Jojo, thank you very much. 0
Sweetie(s) given

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23 September, 2005 at 10:32 am by belgianwaffle
Comments

poggle

on 23 September 2005 at 10:53

They’re obviously comfy in there. Or waiting for ‘their’ new car to turn up. 0
Sweetie(s) given

NorahSplog

on 23 September 2005 at 11:00

Whoo! Congratulations on your new teapot! 2
Sweetie(s) given

JoJo

on 23 September 2005 at 12:05

one sugar and a chocolate digestive please! 0
Sweetie(s) given

Angela

(Homepage)

on 23 September 2005 at 13:20

A new teapot is ALMOST as exciting as twins, right?
I’ll be thinking about you. Best wishes to the family of five!

amerly

on 23 September 2005 at 13:41

going past due date with twins, is almost unheard of, they must be way to comfy in there, go for a bumpy car ride, and a really hot curry. 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 23 September 2005 at 15:34

Well not tooo fast now newshoes because the doctor isn’t back until tomorrow night.
Pog, it’s here, drove around in it today. Bloody enormous.
Norah, I knew you’d be pleased for me and two sweeties. Ta very much.
Jojo, all sweet things are banned – you must suffer with me.
Angela, even more exciting from some angles, I guess.
Amerly, well maybe I should enjoy this time… 0
Sweetie(s) given

poggle

on 23 September 2005 at 15:38

In that case, I expect they’ll be making an appearance shortly, ay? 0
Sweetie(s) given

chintzybling

on 23 September 2005 at 15:43

Come out little ‘uns! 0
Sweetie(s) given

JoJo

on 23 September 2005 at 23:04

In that case, raspberry leaf – straight, with a side of ryvita (how on earth do you spell that?) 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 24 September 2005 at 12:50

Presume so, pog…
But it’s kind of quiet without them Chintzy.
Jojo, wish I’d seen this sage advice before I went shopping this morning. 0
Sweetie(s) given

Locotes

on 26 September 2005 at 16:26

That’s a shame – I was looking forward to some sort of spangly, explosive finale from your ticker as well. How disappointing. Oh well. I suppose the eventual arrival of the twins will be exciting itself. Well, a bit.
😉 0
Sweetie(s) given

]]>

22 September, 2005 at 3:56 pm by belgianwaffle

“The file on H”
by Ismail Kadare. This is my second outing into the works of Mr.
Kadare, so I’m not a complete novice on matters Albanian. In fact
I once went on a day trip to Albania. Really, you’d rather not
know. But yet, Albania remains a distant and weird place to
me. Last night, Mr. Waffle and I gathered together the facts we
know about Albania:

King Zog
Prime Minister Fatos Nana
Great Roman remains
One of the dialects spoken in southern Italy is essentially Albanian
Battles with the Turks
Brought to its financial knees by the collapse of a pyramid selling scheme (I am not making this up)
Capital Tirana (other cities, if they exist unknown to us)
Enver Hoxha (dictator, unpopular with Russia)
Big believers in blood feuds

I think that Albania may be the weirdest country in the Balkans and that’s some accolade.

What ads do you think my blog will deem appropriate to go with this entry?

Comments

UndercoverCookie

on 22 September 2005 at 16:08

Ads might be interesting.. How about blood feuds new and used on ebay, maybe? 0
Sweetie(s) given

UndercoverCookie

on 22 September 2005 at 16:09

also, you know so much more about Albania than I thought there was even to know about the place. I can spell it and that’s about as much I know. 0
Sweetie(s) given

NorahSplog

on 22 September 2005 at 16:14

I have a vague idea that they have lots of goats in Albania. This is everything I ‘know’ about the place. 0
Sweetie(s) given

poggle

on 22 September 2005 at 16:16

I think you’re right, Norah. Goats and bandits. Not necessarily in the same gangs. 0
Sweetie(s) given

formerfilmexpert

on 22 September 2005 at 16:46

was invaded by Italy before WWII – 1938 I think. After Ethipoia. 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 23 September 2005 at 10:28

Pog, I’m impressed.
Cookie, well, remember that this is our pooled knowledge.
Norah, yes I think you’re right about the goats.
FFE, yeah, I knew that really, just forgot to put it down. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. 0
Sweetie(s) given

Star80

on 27 September 2005 at 00:18

As a fellow Albanian I would recommend you all to read more about the country before you stereotype about everything and everyone Albanian.
http://www.albanian.com/information/history/index.html
Stela

]]>

21 September, 2005 at 1:39 pm by belgianwaffle

I superglued myself to a cot this morning while attempting to carry out minor repairs. Quite painful.

Lots of people are telephoning me to wish me luck which is very nice but a little alarming.

We are now a two car family until we flog the Focus. It’s a pain being a two car family when you only have one garage.

I have done my tax return. Round of applause please.

It seems that everything is READY. Except of course for my doctor, she’s still in Croatia.

Comments

NorahSplog

on 21 September 2005 at 13:44

Still no babies?
Are you sure you’re trying hard enough Waffly? I’m not convinced you’re taking this entirely seriously. 0
Sweetie(s) given

JoJo

on 21 September 2005 at 13:46

I wonder if the twins are waiting for said doctor to return? 0
Sweetie(s) given

Friar Tuck

on 21 September 2005 at 16:07

Why not give the Focus to Princess? She’ll be driving soon enough.

belgianwaffle

on 22 September 2005 at 10:38

Pog, yup, I guess so.
Norah, guilty as charged.
Jojo, I hope so.
FT, ha, ha, very funny. 0
Sweetie(s) given

Minkleberry

on 22 September 2005 at 14:17

those two sure have staying power… 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 22 September 2005 at 15:37

Yup! 0
Sweetie(s) given

JoJo

on 23 September 2005 at 09:44

Happy due date! Are you hard at it? 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 23 September 2005 at 10:28

Thanks Jojo, nah, am sitting at home naval gazing which is hard at the moment… 0
Sweetie(s) given

JoJo

on 23 September 2005 at 12:06

Bless you. Have a sweetie and get that new teapot on the go xx 1
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 23 September 2005 at 15:32

Ta Jojo, will save sweetie for after delivery when I will be able to eat everything again! 0
Sweetie(s) given

JoJo

on 23 September 2005 at 23:05

Cake all round and not long now (that would be physically impossible surely?) 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 24 September 2005 at 12:50

Well you would certainly think so! 0
Sweetie(s) given

]]>

19 September, 2005 at 10:28 am by belgianwaffle

Other news from the weekend, my loving husband was saintly and
took herself off swimming and to the park while I reclined on the couch
recruiting my energies. Car free Sunday passed without a sign of
a contraction. We took the tram into town and it was absolutely
jam packed. I stood towards the back and the man sitting beside
me looked resolutely out the window. I felt a bit sorry for him
because, he may well have had some dreadful leg ailment which prevented
him from standing and offering up his seat, but the woman squashed
beside me was determined to make him suffer. She asked me when I
was due and I said Friday. “My goodness” she said pointedly “you
really should be SITTING DOWN”. I said I was fine really, which
was perhaps not entirely true. She explained to me that her
first child had been born at home because she didn’t get to the
hospital in time and that I really should be SITTING DOWN. I
think both myself and the sitting man were quite glad to get off the
tram. Car free day included lots of excitements like a farm in
the city and bouncy castles and the obligatory wide range of food
available at any Belgian organised fun. All moderately
pleasant except for the moment when Mr. Waffle had to run around
looking for a toilet with a little girl in his arms saying with
increasing urgency “I want to do a WEE”.

The Affables dropped round on Sunday and I was once again struck by how
very nice they are and, dammit, even their 18 month old is the picture
of politeness (needless to say, the Princess mortified us by refusing
to let said 18 month old touch any of her toys). I am also
somewhat in awe of their stamina. They both have very demanding
jobs. They collect their little girl from the creche on alternate
evenings but quite frequently the parent responsible will bring her
home, give her dinner, put her to bed, welcome the babysitter and head
back to the office until midnight. And then they’re out partying
regularly at the weekend (when not working). And no, they’re not
even significantly younger than us. When they left, I said
to my loving spouse that we should try to get out more.
“Absolutely” said he. “Will we try to go out to dinner before the
twins are born?” Pause. “Next week?” he asked “I
suppose” I said. “But I’m really tired” he said. “Yeah me too,
let’s not bother”. Pathetic.

Comments

jackdalton

on 19 September 2005 at 11:47
(
Comment Modified) ‘waf: This has to be said– I am absolutely in awe of you and Mr W. and the coolness of your planing & preparation. And whatever the next few weeks bring in terms of tired and stretched to shredding point, there will be one Believer out here. Knowing you can do it.
And there’s always your late-fifties for going out… 😉 0
Sweetie(s) given

Minkleberry

on 19 September 2005 at 11:59

Going out is overrated. The kids going out- now thats where its at! x 0
Sweetie(s) given

kristin

on 19 September 2005 at 18:33

Dear Mrs. Waffle, you are not allowed to feel that you should do more than you already do. The Affables may be affable, but they must also be closet Speed Freaks. The thought of you, days away from bringing twins into the world, actually going into town on a tram to enjoy no-car day instead of staying home with your feet up is quite enough.
xo

Sarcastic Journalist

(Homepage)

on 20 September 2005 at 05:54

I hope you mentioned loudly that you were expecting TWINS on FRIDAY.

lauren35

on 20 September 2005 at 09:45

My sister now has a nanny and a cleaner so that she can have some semblance of a normal life with her twins…. do the Affables have domestic servants?!
Good luck. 1
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 21 September 2005 at 13:12

KE, very romantic.
Thanks Jack, that’s sweet.
Minks, you are very wise.
Oh, Kristin, I like it, closet speed freaks, but I fear it’s just not true.
SJ, well yeah, but it’s just less impressive…
Lauren, I feel we may take a leaf out of your sister’s book. Thank you very much for the sweetie. 0
Sweetie(s) given

]]>

16 September, 2005 at 3:00 pm by belgianwaffle

Me: (Sniff) So where is this conference?
Her: Why do you want to know?
Me: Bet it’s in Dubrovnik.
Her: How did you know?
Me: Because it’s beautiful and people like conferences in beautiful places.
Her: Yes, it’s in the capital.
Me: Um, no it’s not, Zagreb is the capital of Croatia.
Her: Maybe it’s Zagreb then.
Me: Oh well, less glam.
Her: But it will be nice to be by the sea.
Me: Zagreb is not on the sea.
Her: Then it must be the other place.
Me: For God’s sake woman you’re going there next week.
Her: Well, you seem to know the place quite well, do they use the euro?
Me: NO!
Her: They’re not part of the community then.
Me: Oh dear lord.
Her: Well what currency do they use?
Me: Can’t remember (it’s the kuna, if you’re curious, Mr. Waffle knew, of course).
Her: Tut tut and you were there and everything.

In other pregnancy related news, Mr. Waffle brought me home yesterday a
pile of Su Doku puzzles which he suggests I might like to occupy
myself with when I go into labour. Is this very endearing or
somewhat odd? Bit of both, I suppose.

Comments

belgianwaffle

on 16 September 2005 at 15:07

Oh Maisy, yes indeed as I know to my cost. 0
Sweetie(s) given

erudite_baboon

on 16 September 2005 at 15:11

Imagine a conference being more important than your twins – the very idea! They should postpone the conference until after they’ve been delivered. Sudokus are rubbish – I’ve done two my entire life. That’s an hour I’m never getting back. 0
Sweetie(s) given

JoJo

on 16 September 2005 at 15:54

Hmmm…
Su Doku an intense game of strategy that requires concentration, patience and a keen mind.
Labour an intense experience of pain and suffering that scrambles the brain, throttles your patience and makes you hop like a chicken.
A marriage made in heaven I’d say. 0
Sweetie(s) given

poggle

on 16 September 2005 at 16:01

‘hop like a chicken’? Really? The more I hear, the more pleased I am that I am never, never going to find out for myself. 0
Sweetie(s) given

Locotes

on 17 September 2005 at 09:45

You just know once you start those puzzles you’ll love it. Great to pass the time with. I went through a ton of them by the pool on me holliers…

Still managing to look manly and sexy of course…

Ahem. 0
Sweetie(s) given

beachhutman

on 17 September 2005 at 21:25

Bloody “OK, Sod U”. At least crosswords can use 26 letters and half a million English words. I cannot see the point or the fun. Especially in labour. But a nice supportive thought though.
Don’t they use the Euro? Turkey isn’t in the EU, and they do. In places I guess. 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 19 September 2005 at 10:01

Erudite baboon, you are wise and your name is well chosen.
Jojo, quite.
Pog, yes, I fear so. And you will find out for yourself someday and then you’ll be sorry (snicker, snicker).
Loc, of course.
BHM, didn’t know they took euro in Turkey in spots, will bear in mind, if I ever go on holidays again… 0
Sweetie(s) given

poggle

on 19 September 2005 at 10:44

I won’t y’know, waffley. Really I won’t. 0
Sweetie(s) given

Locotes

on 19 September 2005 at 11:51

*getting into the panto spirit*
Oh yes you will! 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 21 September 2005 at 13:10

Right as always Loc, “oh yes, you will!” 0
Sweetie(s) given

]]>

Juliette

16 September, 2005 at 2:44 pm by belgianwaffle

She’s not as fond of Juliette as she is of T’choupi, the world’s dullest mole, but she is moderately fond. We possess 3* of these works and they are very true to life. Just a little bit too true to life. Let me give you some examples.

Juliette goes shopping.

She pesters her mother to buy chocolate cornflakes because she’s seen on the telly that there’s a present inside. She demands that her mother buys ice cream.

Juliette on the Farm

She sees piglets being fed by their mother (go on, you try to explain to a two year old what’s going on here). She watches the farmer attaching the milking machine to a cow (again a difficult one to explain – surely milk comes from cartons) while the cow flicks away flies with her tail. Juliette is warned to stand well back in case the cow poos on her.

Juliette has a little Brother (purchased for propaganda purposes)

Juliette wees all over the floor because no one is paying her any attention. This is clearly illustrated so even if one doesn’t read the accompanying text, it is quite apparent what is going on here.

I see that there is an offering entitled “Juliette celebrates Christmas” available in the series. Doubtless this is where young readers are told that there is no Santa Claus.

*Updated to add – as of May 2007 we appear to have about 16 Juliettes all with that delightfully honest take on the life of a small child.

Comments
chintzybling

on 16 September 2005 at 14:48

Juliette wets herself? Juliette sounds filthy to me.

belgianwaffle

on 16 September 2005 at 15:08

Chintzy, I’m appalled.
Jojo, you and me both, frankly, I’m amazed that there is other news available though I enjoyed your link to Brittany and Kevin’s site very much…

JoJo

on 16 September 2005 at 15:55

I’m hoping to see a similar broadcast here some time soon (don’t forget the virtual baloons now will you?)

Sarcastic Journalist

(Homepage)

on 16 September 2005 at 21:52

Weeing on the floor? Is this book trying to give the children ideas?

jackdalton

on 16 September 2005 at 22:42
(
Comment Modified) If you want to see real kiddy-read mayhem, look no further than Katie Morag Delivers the Mail. Or in fact any Katie Morag story. Priceless 🙂

belgianwaffle

on 19 September 2005 at 09:59

Jojo, am even now investigating the technology for same.
SJ, yes.
JD, no more mayhem please.

15 September, 2005 at 10:49 am by belgianwaffle

Poor old Mr. Waffle went for lunch with a Danish colleague yesterday
who told him that the car we bought is prone to exploding when
parked. A hunt on google reveals that this is apparently
true. But only in Nordic countries (something to do with their
excellent social model, or possibly the climate) and only for older
models. But he is now officially worried about the vehicle we
have selected to transport our precious progeny. In an effort to
ensure that he continued in this happy frame of mind, another colleague
whose wife is also pregnant reminded him that Sunday is car free
day. This colleague has got a special permit to drive on Sunday,
in case his wife needs to go to the hospital. To get the
permit, you need to get a note from your doctor stating that you
are pregnant and take it to the commune. I have refused to do
this. I think that, if we are stopped by the police on the way to
the hospital, I can persuade them I am pregnant. Or we can get a
taxi. But my spouse worries.

Comments

poggle

on 16 September 2005 at 12:48

I do think the police might actually notice that for themselves, don’t you? I mean, I hear you have a bump. A visible bump. 0
Sweetie(s) given

jackdalton

on 16 September 2005 at 14:42

Some of the local guys probably wouldn’t accept even visible evidence without the requisite papers…. 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 16 September 2005 at 15:06

Thanks Amy.
Well you might think so pog but Jack shows an uncanny knowledge of Belgian policing. 0
Sweetie(s) given

jackdalton

on 19 September 2005 at 11:02

Some things live on long after the event 😉 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 21 September 2005 at 13:09

Um, interesting Jack.. 0
Sweetie(s) given

]]>

14 September, 2005 at 10:28 am by belgianwaffle

car
which will hold three car seats. On the minus side we will never
be able to park on the street again due to its enormous dimensions.

This morning I spent three quarters of an hour curled up on the bed
thinking this is sore. Are these contractions? You’d think
I’d know after last time but, really, you do forget everything.
Anyway, last time I was induced and the gap between my first
contraction and the arrival of the epidural was mercifully short.
I struggled to the phone to ring Mr. Waffle but he was off at a
meeting. I sent him an alarming email. And now, I feel
absolutely fine. So there’s a completely unnecessary panic.
Or perhaps not. Stay tuned for further updates.

Comments

NorahSplog

on 14 September 2005 at 11:40

Eeek! 0
Sweetie(s) given

UndercoverCookie

on 14 September 2005 at 13:45

so you wait until you feel fine again before blogging? I am starting to doubt your commitment. Next time contractions start – blog before you contact Mr Waffle. We need to be kept informed of these matters. 0
Sweetie(s) given

Lilo

on 14 September 2005 at 13:50

Cor – a bit scary/exciting. I hope you’ve got your bag packed. Good luck. 0
Sweetie(s) given

poggle

on 14 September 2005 at 14:14

Oooh! The sprogs are nigh! Thinking of you, waffley. 0
Sweetie(s) given

Minkleberry

on 14 September 2005 at 14:36

God- I’m so excited for you. xx 1
Sweetie(s) given

Locotes

on 14 September 2005 at 16:40

Well according to the thingy at the top of your page there are 9 days left, and I’m assuming it’s completely accurate. So stop panicking, and enjoy your week and a bit of lying in bed.
😉 0
Sweetie(s) given

Friar Tuck

on 14 September 2005 at 16:41

I think I am as excited as Mr. Waffle–that is, if he is excited.
Then again, it is easy to be excited when its not your body parts that are being stretched to unnatural dimensions.
Prayers and best wishes.

KateEvans

on 14 September 2005 at 23:06

I can’t believe you’re so close. How exciting! 0
Sweetie(s) given

jackdalton

on 15 September 2005 at 00:21

Wonderful…. it’s looking like we’re all soon going to be @unties and digital uncles and the like!!!! (And your lot won the all-Ireland.)
🙂
Good luck. A sinner’s prayer is gone your way. 0
Sweetie(s) given

Friar Tuck

on 15 September 2005 at 04:42

Took a peek at your car. Do you realize that your “enormous” car would fit in the boot of most American cars?

Sarcastic Journalist

(Homepage)

on 15 September 2005 at 05:24

Ugg! I hate waiting! And? Wow, three car seats. That’s hard to imagine!

JoJo

on 15 September 2005 at 09:12

Good luck – times two!!!
xxxxxxxxxxx 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 15 September 2005 at 10:57

Amy, Norah, Lilo, Pog, Minks, Jojo, KE hold off with the luck and sweeties (thanks Minks) – false alarm; sorry! But you know, maybe soon something will happen.
Cookie, I have dutifully noted your comments and matters will be rectified.
Locotes, you appear to be right as usual.
FT, keep praying. And yes I know, but Americans have cheap petrol. Do you know it’s 1 euro 40 a litre here?
JD, sinner’s prayers are particularly valuable, keep at it. And isn’t it great that we won, though no surprise etc.
SJ, yes 3 car seats is terrifying, frankly. 0
Sweetie(s) given

]]>

12 September, 2005 at 10:12 am by belgianwaffle

Matters started badly. The Princess decided against a long nap
and we found her standing by her bedroom door with doggy in hand and
the curtains drawn saying “Enough nap”. Alas. As we had
both been napping we were not of the same view.

We drove to this kiddie farm. The traffic was brutal. Many
of the tunnels which make Bxls an excellent place to be a motorist
(though a rotten one to be a pedestrian) were closed. At one
stage, herself asked “Are we going to France?” and I thought, well,
actually, we probably could have driven to France in the time it has
taken us to reach this Brussels suburb. And Mr. Waffle had
put his back out, and he was doing directions and the mobile which I
had failed to recharge was making pathetic “I’m dying here” noises from
the depths of my handbag: all of which tended to make Mr. Waffle
tetchy. And I begged the Princess to be silent while her father
consulted the map but she was having none of it. “I want to TALK”
she wailed. This did not improve anyone’s mood.

Hours later we arrived at the kiddie farm. There was an ice cream
van outside and, in probably the day’s only sensible move, we instantly
yielded to the Princess’s screams for ice cream. We trekked down
the hill to the farm. Well I waddled, Mr. Waffle walked hunched
to one side and the Princess trekked. It was a bit limited.
A lot of the excitements that would have been available had we arrived
somewhat earlier were over. The Princess was terrified of all the
animals and demanded to be carried. I couldn’t carry her.
Mr. Waffle was able to put her on his shoulder and lurch hump back of
Notre Dame like around the various attractions. I think it would
be fair to say that nobody had a good time.

We left about half an hour after our arrival. On the way home,
the Princess announced “I want to do a wee” and for the first
time ever, proceeded to wee in her car seat. After we got her to
bed, Mr. Waffle and I spent the remainder of the evening trying to get
the wretched cover off the car seat with a view to chucking it in the
washing machine. Sigh. We’re still recovering.

Comments

Lilo

on 12 September 2005 at 11:31

All I can say, after reading your last few entries, is that I deeply sympathise. 1
Sweetie(s) given

poggle

on 12 September 2005 at 12:00

Oh dear … 0
Sweetie(s) given

Minkleberry

on 12 September 2005 at 15:16

Is this when you stand outside the maternity unit, bang on the door and demand they deliver your children IMMEDIATELY!
Much sympathy xxxxx 2
Sweetie(s) given

dmts

on 13 September 2005 at 19:07

Oh my goodness – I’ve just looked at your timeline and the babies are imminent? Yes? Oh gosh you have instructed Mr Waffle to blog the news haven’t you? 0
Sweetie(s) given

jackdalton

on 13 September 2005 at 21:32

She’s from Cork. 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 14 September 2005 at 10:19

JD, um, yes, let me reflect on that.
Thanks Lilo and a sweetie to boot.
Pog, good summary.
Minks, 2 sweeties and excellent advice, you are the picture of goodness.
HJB – I will discuss with him.
JD – Eh? 0
Sweetie(s) given

]]>

9 September, 2005 at 8:23 pm by belgianwaffle

2. I will stop blogging and you will think that I have delivered twins
but, in fact, our computer will have collapsed. It keeps turning
itself off and sulking. Do you think that this is a good sign?

3. My stomach.

Comments

UndercoverCookie

on 12 September 2005 at 10:00

the flippers and snorkelling equipment will become child sized for a while and the picnic baskets bigger. 0
Sweetie(s) given

poggle

on 12 September 2005 at 11:57

Sprogeology, that is ….
You’re talking about the well-documented Pre-Sprogian era, followed by the Inter-Familian. I assume. 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 14 September 2005 at 10:14

BHM, maybe…
UC, you are wise beyond your years..
Pog, but I never thought it would happen to me. 0
Sweetie(s) given

poggle

on 14 September 2005 at 13:57

Apparently you grow out of it, waffle. Eventually. 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 15 September 2005 at 10:51

I have my doubts pog.. 0
Sweetie(s) given

poggle

on 16 September 2005 at 10:24

Oh well. Second childhoods are pretty good, so I’m told …. 😉 0
Sweetie(s) given

]]>

8 September, 2005 at 8:44 am by belgianwaffle

Dorothy Parker and her estate.

Three be the things I am wiser to know:
Antenatal classes, proper diet and the myth of a pregnancy glow

Four be the things I’d been better without:
Swollen ankles, vomiting, heartburn and doubt.

Three be the things I shall never attain:
Stylish clothes, a tiny bump and insufficient pain.

Three be the things I shall have till I deliver:
Anaemia, diabetes and worries about problems upriver.

Yes, I know it doesn’t scan. Poetry writing is harder than you might imagine.

And may I use this opportunity to announce that my sister-in-law has
joined the ranks of the pregnant. Fantastic, the Princess will
have a cousin
in February. Yes, I’m sure that they think of it in those terms
also; why do you ask? Anyhow, much rejoicing and excitement

Comments

belgianwaffle

on 09 September 2005 at 13:11

Thank you. You are most kind, I will save the sweeties for when I can eat them again.. 0
Sweetie(s) given

KateEvans

on 09 September 2005 at 21:25

That’s very good. Are you not glowing though? I’ve been aglow for six months now and just assumed that, with twins, one would be doubly incandescent. 0
Sweetie(s) given

jackdalton

on 10 September 2005 at 18:08

oh puuatree… very nice. 🙂 1
Sweetie(s) given

Friar Tuck

on 12 September 2005 at 02:58

At least your pome rimes. I don’t take to them pomes what don’t rime.
And you’re wrong about it not scanning. I scanned it this evening, and it worked perfectly.

belgianwaffle

on 12 September 2005 at 09:23

Um, no KE, I am pale and wan. The sedge has withered from the lake and no birds sing (this poetry stuff gets really addictive).
You are v. generous JD.
FT, you’ve been away. Welcome back. 0
Sweetie(s) given

]]>

7 September, 2005 at 8:29 am by belgianwaffle

Her: I was sad Mummy. I cried.
Me: Oh dear sweetie, why were you sad?
Her: I wanted you and you wasn’t there.
Me: Oh sweetheart, I’m very sorry.
Her: Veronique (woman at creche) gave me a hug but I was still sad and I wanted you.

I was gutted.

Yesterday on the telephone to her grandma:

Her: I was sad Grandma. I cried at the creche.
Grandma: Oh dear, why were you sad?
Her: I wanted you and you was in Dublin.
Grandma: Oh dear
Her (in tones of deep reproach): I was SAD and you wasn’t there.

Me: Hang on a minute here…

Comments

poggle

on 07 September 2005 at 10:41

She’s getting better and better at this – reminds me of the ‘I want Daddy/Mummy’ bedtime scenario a while back.
Hee hee. 0
Sweetie(s) given

JoJo

on 07 September 2005 at 13:16

Clever girl! She’ll go far.
Re: the imminent arrivals – hope you are bearing up Ok mum xxx 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 08 September 2005 at 08:54

Thanks Sus, Pog, I think.
Bit fed up Jojo, but, you know, fine, thanks. 0
Sweetie(s) given

]]>

5 September, 2005 at 8:52 am by belgianwaffle

Mr. Waffle: So what will they sleep in?
Me: I was thinking I’d get Moses basket thingys.
Him: What are they?
Me: Little baskety things.
Him: You know, I’m really beginning to understand why my parents put me
in a drawer when I was a baby. Drawers are the perfect size for
babies. And it hasn’t done me any harm.
Me (mutinously): Our babies are not sleeping in a drawer.
Him (placatingly): We could put stencils on the side.
Me (definitively): No.

Comments

dmts

on 05 September 2005 at 12:29

I think that’s the most optimistic heading ever. Where will our babies ‘sleep’? Not, WHEN will our babies sleep? or WILL our babies ever sleep. The power of positive thinking… 0
Sweetie(s) given

Minkleberry

on 05 September 2005 at 13:29
(
Comment Modified) I had exactly the same conversation with Jimi-except he wanted to use the contents of the drawers as blankets.
Incidentally, Jimi is a twin and he and his sibling slept together in a cot when they were new. They liked being close and slept better as a result. 0
Sweetie(s) given

Peggy

on 05 September 2005 at 14:57

Between Mom and Dad, i.e. in your bed. Isn’t that what parents are supposed to do nowadays to grow fully-confident children?
Can they share the Princess’ old bed? One on each side. At least in the beginning.
I thought this drawer thing was a great laugh!;)

sus

on 05 September 2005 at 19:15

I slept in a Moses basket! Apparently it was very handy for dinners out too, no cots or prams, just carry me in and lay me down under the table… 0
Sweetie(s) given

jackdalton

on 06 September 2005 at 13:32
(
Comment Modified) Moses baskets are a disaster to strap into a car.
Sus: so that’s why you spend so much time under tables. And here was I thinking it was the drink…. 😉
[Joke.. joke… pace.]
‘waff: you might I think enjoy this. 0
Sweetie(s) given

StarCorner

on 06 September 2005 at 22:15

Can I send you a book on baby care for Mr Waffle perhaps?!! 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 07 September 2005 at 08:25

Pog, exactly, and expected levels of sleep deprivation are likely to lead to precisely that result.
HJB, you are bad, but accurate.
Minks, glad I’m not the only one with a drawer obsessed spouse. I do plan to stick them together. My latest thought is maybe in the travel cot.
Peggy. Yes. But we will sacrifice their confidence for our sleep. We are cruel and unnatural.
Sus, have investigated the cost of these things in mothercare; they are horribly dear. Am considering alternatives.
Jack, I’m sure you’re right. But how do you know?? Thanks for link.
StarCorner – that would be very welcome… 0
Sweetie(s) given

KateEvans

on 07 September 2005 at 08:54

Three cheers for being ‘cruel and unnatural’. But the sweetie goes to Mr. W for thinking that “We could put stencils on the side” was a big selling point. 1
Sweetie(s) given

jackdalton

on 07 September 2005 at 09:50

You know That Quiet Kid — the one who says very little but is always watching someone or something with total intensity, soaking up every detail and nuance of the moment? The one who consequently grows up to keep doing it and becomes a font of the most incredible and varied human & related trivia?
That would be me… 😉 0
Sweetie(s) given

sus

on 07 September 2005 at 10:19

Oh Jack, that was all contained in the dot dot dot… 0
Sweetie(s) given

beachhutman

on 07 September 2005 at 18:26

I had a cot under the sink.
Really. M and D were building the house. 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 08 September 2005 at 08:54

KE, Mr. Waffle is thrilled. Ta.
JD, Sus, stop it!
BHM, sounds very secure and comfortable. 0
Sweetie(s) given

]]>

Requires Medical Attention

2 September, 2005 at 8:55 am by belgianwaffle

Me: Yes, sweetheart.
Princess: Your doctor is a woman.
Me: Well, my main doctor is a woman, yes.
Princess: How many doctors have you got, Mummy?
Me (following a quick tot of the number of doctors I have seen during this pregnancy): 8.
Princess: God, Mummy, that’s a lot of doctors.

Comments
jackdalton
on 03 September 2005 at 23:36
>That’s only two and a bit each…. it isn’t that much really. 😐
[But full marks to the princess for her Corkistic register and intonation 🙂 ]

belgianwaffle
on 05 September 2005 at 08:56
Yes, pog, thank you. JD, yes, I am doing excellent work on the Cork accent.

The Pregnancy Diet

1 September, 2005 at 11:54 am by belgianwaffle

Things I cannot eat because I am diabetic:
Anything sweet
Fruit (sweet, alas)
Bread, rice, pasta, potatoes
Also, I must eat six small meals a day rather than three large ones and do you know that after I see the diabetic doctor on Monday, I will have to prick my finger a number of times a day to test my blood sugar? Oh goody.

Things I should eat because I am anaemic:
Revolting iron tablets
Red meat
Lentils
Liver

Things I cannot eat because I am pregnant:
Shellfish
Pâté
Salmon
Raw ham
Raw eggs
Liver
Rare meat (well done red meat is just a hard and depressing lump on your plate)
Unpasturised cheese (i.e. anything remotely interesting, I have had it with babybel)
Everything else in the world because I suffer from constant heartburn

The upshot of all this is that I spend my time eating steak and salad and, oh yes, lentils, lots of lentils. I am essentially on the Atkins diet and it works, I am losing weight (as is Mr. Waffle incidentally, my mother is appalled, she thinks it’s a searing indictment of my wifeliness). But I don’t want to lose weight. I need to gain weight. And I am trying. Kind Mr. Waffle produced a cucumber salad for me. Delicious, ok for
pregnant, anaemic diabetics and, as I said to him, so fattening.
“Really?” he asked, delighted. Oh good Lord. I look very odd. My stomach is enormous but the rest of me is pretty thin. I am developing twiggy little arms. I look a bit like someone rather skinny who’s stuck a large basketball up her jumper and is pretending to be pregnant.

The next person who says to me: it must be great to be pregnant because you can eat anything you want will be shot.

And did I mention that I’m still throwing up?

Comments
NorahSplog
on 01 September 2005 at 12:47
I bet you’re really missing your raw eggs.

NorahSplog
on 01 September 2005 at 12:50
Oh, and my Pa has recently been diagnosed diabetic and been given a finger pricky thing. All the family’s had a go and it really doesn’t hurt. I think my Pa has become quite obsessed with checking his blood sugar and probably does it more times a day than is necessary (but then he is a man, and is consequently delighted to have something ‘real’ wrong with him).
Minkleberry
on 01 September 2005 at 13:13
Belg, I really really feel for you and can’t even think of any ‘bright side’ things to say-which is probably for the best as bright side things are just bloody annoying anyway. Will you be unanaemic and undiabetic when the twins emerge?
belgianwaffle
on 02 September 2005 at 08:52
Pog, you are very kind. Do email, if you get a chance. Do you know what I found myself thinking this morning – I wonder what pog’s haircut is like? How weird is that? Norah yes (please note cold tone). And you are clearly tough as nails, you Splogs, for reasons I won’t bore you with, I had it done last night and it does hurt a bit. Oh, I am so ready for the pain of childbirth. Minks, thank you. And yes. And it looks like I might be able to have some more carbohydrate which would be very nice…beachhutman on 02 September 2005 at 09:52
Poor old Waff. Well, not Old, obviously. Nor poor I s’pose. Anyway, huge symps.
Is that Bread or wheat? Rye bread?
(I always find it better to be still throwing up, otherwise it goes ……..)
beachhutman
on 02 September 2005 at 09:54
Norah is supposed to be trying to give away more sweeties, but becuse you can’t enjoy them she didn’t. Here’s one she could have given you. (you can save it for later)
poggle
on 02 September 2005 at 10:37
Okey dokey – will type ’em up and send later today, lovely. Oh, and my haircut is very short and kind of scruffy ….
Lilo
on 02 September 2005 at 12:18
h God – poor you – on both the diet and the chucking up front. Fortunately my days of feeling sick all the time finished after about week 16, I’d be very fed up if I was still feeling sick now.
Minkleberry
on 02 September 2005 at 13:53
I hope there is a very big box of chocolate biscuits waiting for you on the other side of the delivery room. And I’m still throwing up aswell- but at least I’m throwing up chocolate and crisps!
poggle
on 02 September 2005 at 13:58
Have mailed you. But I think I missed a bit in the drop-scones recipe. You need to drop spoonsful of the batter into a lightly-oiled, preheated frying pan – I generally makes them about 3″ diameter – they do spread a bit and rise. Hope you like ’em.
beachhutman
on 03 September 2005 at 23:36
Ah Pog, “quelle beaucoup” as Del would say. The recipe man, the recipe! cest all important, guarded carefully down the generations. A man must do the thing a man must do with the drop scones, and the iron pan, and the warm teatowel. Ah, it is so good. The cream, the jam, the ritual.
belgianwaffle
on 05 September 2005 at 09:08
BHM, oldish, poorish (due to weight of doctors’ fees). On the bread/wheat question, not really sure, am woefully ignorant about my condition alas. Thanks for Norah’s sweetie though! Pog, your haircut sounds fab. Very envious. Mine is short and motherly, kind of early Princess Di. Very distressing. Thank you for your recipes – you are most virtuous. Am entirely baffled by BHM’s comments on same but doubtless they make sense to you? Lilo, well, it’s not as bad or as frequent as earlier throwing up, so you know, alright really. Noble sigh. Minks, there better be. I have added the words “prepare goody bag for wife on giving birth” to Mr. Waffle’s to do list.
poggle
on 05 September 2005 at 11:17
BHM has not looked on ‘Munch’ or he would’ve seen that my drop scones are not of the traditional, sweet variety. Although those those are also very good – just no good for you at the moment as you’re off the wheat and the sugar. (At least, I think that’s what he’s on about.) As for the haircut, I had to resort to wearing girly tops with my jeans this weekend to avoid being chased around the pub by scarey women. It might be just a leeeeetle bit too short …
belgianwaffle
on 07 September 2005 at 08:20
Hey pog, you are all knowing, yes, I see what you mean about the scones. And the hair, very trendy and um, it will grow.
poggle
on 07 September 2005 at 10:15
It’s not growing quite fast enough. So today I am wearing a cute little smocky top (very ‘summer of love’) with my best jeans and kitten-heeled sandals. And dangly earrings. And lippy. I’m not sure anyone’s convinced, though.
belgianwaffle
on 08 September 2005 at 08:55
They LOVE it – appealing to both sexes.


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