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There are times when I hate this job

My mother and brother came to visit for the weekend (my father steadfastly refusing to fly since he retired and doesn’t have to any more). There were many presents and there was much delight. All this love-in stuff is very tiresome for the blog reader so I will get straight to the only blog worthy incident of the weekend.

Due to my sister’s enormous carbon footprint and many years spent in hotels (insert here bitter mumbling from my brother about expense accounts – he is a lab rat and has never had one and absolutely refuses to believe that eating out can be torture as well as pleasure), she was able to book my brother and mother into a swish hotel in Brussels on her various points. This was, frankly, welcome as our flat is too small to accommodate two visitors who do not want to sleep together. This is relevant, bear with me.

So, on Friday afternoon, the Princess and I took my mother and brother to their hotel. My mother and I sat and chatted in her room while my brother unpacked in his and entertained her highness.

As I sat there with my mother, I heard a mournful little voice saying, “I want my mummy”, so I flew to her side. My brother was standing in his room looking sheepish. “I did a poo Mummy,” she said “and it won’t go away”. I went in to the bathroom and discovered that she had done a poo in the bidet; look, it’s the size of a kiddie toilet. So while my brother stood cowering outside and my daughter put her hands over her eyes saying, “that’s disgusting”, I took some toilet paper and transferred the poo bit by bit to the toilet.

This was not included in my original job description.



5 Responses to “There are times when I hate this job”

  1. Jordana Says:

    Yes. Yessss. I have had to do this, too–from a bath, though. I used a cup my daughter uses as a bath toy. (I even washed the cup before I gave it back to her.)

    Traumatic.

  2. Charlotte Says:

    You made me choke on my coffee. That was hilarious but also awful. I have had to scoop poo from a bath before, except I made my husband do it.

  3. heather Says:

    this story should be used in schools during ‘sex education’ classes – that’ll reduce the teenage pregnancy rate.

  4. geepeemum Says:

    Yes, we’ve had a few bath incidents. my top tip: next time have some baby wipes handy. They fall apart a lot less quickly than toilet paper…..

  5. islaygirl Says:

    oh, poor princess. poor, poor princess.

    and maman, too. ick.


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