Sleeping Arrangements

Mr. Waffle: So what will they sleep in?
Me: I was thinking I’d get Moses basket thingys.
Him: What are they?
Me: Little baskety things.
Him: You know, I’m really beginning to understand why my parents put me in a drawer when I was a baby. Drawers are the perfect size for babies. And it hasn’t done me any harm.
Me (mutinously): Our babies are not sleeping in a drawer.
Him (placatingly): We could put stencils on the side.
Me (definitively): No.



on 05 September 2005 at 12:29

I think that’s the most optimistic heading ever. Where will our babies ‘sleep’? Not, WHEN will our babies sleep? or WILL our babies ever sleep. The power of positive thinking..


on 05 September 2005 at 13:29
I had exactly the same conversation with Jimi-except he wanted to use the contents of the drawers as blankets.
Incidentally, Jimi is a twin and he and his sibling slept together in a cot when they were new. They liked being close and slept better as a result.


on 05 September 2005 at 14:57

Between Mom and Dad, i.e. in your bed. Isn’t that what parents are supposed to do nowadays to grow fully-confident children?
Can they share the Princess’ old bed? One on each side. At least in the beginning.
I thought this drawer thing was a great laugh!;) ???


on 05 September 2005 at 19:15

I slept in a Moses basket! Apparently it was very handy for dinners out too, no cots or prams, just carry me in and lay me down under the table…


on 06 September 2005 at 13:32
Moses baskets are a disaster to strap into a car.
Sus: so that’s why you spend so much time under tables. And here was I thinking it was the drink…. 😉
[Joke.. joke… pace.]
‘waff: you might I think enjoy this.


on 06 September 2005 at 22:15

Can I send you a book on baby care for Mr Waffle perhaps?!!


on 07 September 2005 at 08:25

Pog, exactly, and expected levels of sleep deprivation are likely to lead to precisely that result.
HJB, you are bad, but accurate.
Minks, glad I’m not the only one with a drawer obsessed spouse. I do plan to stick them together. My latest thought is maybe in the travel cot.
Peggy. Yes. But we will sacrifice their confidence for our sleep. We are cruel and unnatural.
Sus, have investigated the cost of these things in mothercare; they are horribly dear. Am considering alternatives.
Jack, I’m sure you’re right. But how do you know?? Thanks for link.
StarCorner – that would be very welcome…


on 07 September 2005 at 08:54

Three cheers for being ‘cruel and unnatural’. But the sweetie goes to Mr. W for thinking that “We could put stencils on the side” was a big selling point..


on 07 September 2005 at 09:50

You know That Quiet Kid — the one who says very little but is always watching someone or something with total intensity, soaking up every detail and nuance of the moment? The one who consequently grows up to keep doing it and becomes a font of the most incredible and varied human & related trivia?
That would be me… 😉


on 07 September 2005 at 10:19

Oh Jack, that was all contained in the dot dot dot..


on 07 September 2005 at 18:26

I had a cot under the sink.
Really. M and D were building the house.


on 08 September 2005 at 08:54

KE, Mr. Waffle is thrilled. Ta.
JD, Sus, stop it!
BHM, sounds very secure and comfortable.

Requires Medical Attention

Me: Yes, sweetheart.
Princess: Your doctor is a woman.
Me: Well, my main doctor is a woman, yes.
Princess: How many doctors have you got, Mummy?
Me (following a quick tot of the number of doctors I have seen during this pregnancy): 8.
Princess: God, Mummy, that’s a lot of doctors.

on 03 September 2005 at 23:36
>That’s only two and a bit each…. it isn’t that much really. 😐
[But full marks to the princess for her Corkistic register and intonation 🙂 ]

on 05 September 2005 at 08:56
Yes, pog, thank you. JD, yes, I am doing excellent work on the Cork accent.

The Pregnancy Diet

Things I cannot eat because I am diabetic:
Anything sweet
Fruit (sweet, alas)
Bread, rice, pasta, potatoes
Also, I must eat six small meals a day rather than three large ones and do you know that after I see the diabetic doctor on Monday, I will have to prick my finger a number of times a day to test my blood sugar? Oh goody.

Things I should eat because I am anaemic:
Revolting iron tablets
Red meat

Things I cannot eat because I am pregnant:
Raw ham
Raw eggs
Rare meat (well done red meat is just a hard and depressing lump on your plate)
Unpasturised cheese (i.e. anything remotely interesting, I have had it with babybel)
Everything else in the world because I suffer from constant heartburn

The upshot of all this is that I spend my time eating steak and salad and, oh yes, lentils, lots of lentils. I am essentially on the Atkins diet and it works, I am losing weight (as is Mr. Waffle incidentally, my mother is appalled, she thinks it’s a searing indictment of my wifeliness). But I don’t want to lose weight. I need to gain weight. And I am trying. Kind Mr. Waffle produced a cucumber salad for me. Delicious, ok for
pregnant, anaemic diabetics and, as I said to him, so fattening.
“Really?” he asked, delighted. Oh good Lord. I look very odd. My stomach is enormous but the rest of me is pretty thin. I am developing twiggy little arms. I look a bit like someone rather skinny who’s stuck a large basketball up her jumper and is pretending to be pregnant.

The next person who says to me: it must be great to be pregnant because you can eat anything you want will be shot.

And did I mention that I’m still throwing up?

on 01 September 2005 at 12:47
I bet you’re really missing your raw eggs.

on 01 September 2005 at 12:50
Oh, and my Pa has recently been diagnosed diabetic and been given a finger pricky thing. All the family’s had a go and it really doesn’t hurt. I think my Pa has become quite obsessed with checking his blood sugar and probably does it more times a day than is necessary (but then he is a man, and is consequently delighted to have something ‘real’ wrong with him).
on 01 September 2005 at 13:13
Belg, I really really feel for you and can’t even think of any ‘bright side’ things to say-which is probably for the best as bright side things are just bloody annoying anyway. Will you be unanaemic and undiabetic when the twins emerge?
on 02 September 2005 at 08:52
Pog, you are very kind. Do email, if you get a chance. Do you know what I found myself thinking this morning – I wonder what pog’s haircut is like? How weird is that? Norah yes (please note cold tone). And you are clearly tough as nails, you Splogs, for reasons I won’t bore you with, I had it done last night and it does hurt a bit. Oh, I am so ready for the pain of childbirth. Minks, thank you. And yes. And it looks like I might be able to have some more carbohydrate which would be very nice…beachhutman on 02 September 2005 at 09:52
Poor old Waff. Well, not Old, obviously. Nor poor I s’pose. Anyway, huge symps.
Is that Bread or wheat? Rye bread?
(I always find it better to be still throwing up, otherwise it goes ……..)
on 02 September 2005 at 09:54
Norah is supposed to be trying to give away more sweeties, but becuse you can’t enjoy them she didn’t. Here’s one she could have given you. (you can save it for later)
on 02 September 2005 at 10:37
Okey dokey – will type ’em up and send later today, lovely. Oh, and my haircut is very short and kind of scruffy ….
on 02 September 2005 at 12:18
h God – poor you – on both the diet and the chucking up front. Fortunately my days of feeling sick all the time finished after about week 16, I’d be very fed up if I was still feeling sick now.
on 02 September 2005 at 13:53
I hope there is a very big box of chocolate biscuits waiting for you on the other side of the delivery room. And I’m still throwing up aswell- but at least I’m throwing up chocolate and crisps!
on 02 September 2005 at 13:58
Have mailed you. But I think I missed a bit in the drop-scones recipe. You need to drop spoonsful of the batter into a lightly-oiled, preheated frying pan – I generally makes them about 3″ diameter – they do spread a bit and rise. Hope you like ’em.
on 03 September 2005 at 23:36
Ah Pog, “quelle beaucoup” as Del would say. The recipe man, the recipe! cest all important, guarded carefully down the generations. A man must do the thing a man must do with the drop scones, and the iron pan, and the warm teatowel. Ah, it is so good. The cream, the jam, the ritual.
on 05 September 2005 at 09:08
BHM, oldish, poorish (due to weight of doctors’ fees). On the bread/wheat question, not really sure, am woefully ignorant about my condition alas. Thanks for Norah’s sweetie though! Pog, your haircut sounds fab. Very envious. Mine is short and motherly, kind of early Princess Di. Very distressing. Thank you for your recipes – you are most virtuous. Am entirely baffled by BHM’s comments on same but doubtless they make sense to you? Lilo, well, it’s not as bad or as frequent as earlier throwing up, so you know, alright really. Noble sigh. Minks, there better be. I have added the words “prepare goody bag for wife on giving birth” to Mr. Waffle’s to do list.
on 05 September 2005 at 11:17
BHM has not looked on ‘Munch’ or he would’ve seen that my drop scones are not of the traditional, sweet variety. Although those those are also very good – just no good for you at the moment as you’re off the wheat and the sugar. (At least, I think that’s what he’s on about.) As for the haircut, I had to resort to wearing girly tops with my jeans this weekend to avoid being chased around the pub by scarey women. It might be just a leeeeetle bit too short …
on 07 September 2005 at 08:20
Hey pog, you are all knowing, yes, I see what you mean about the scones. And the hair, very trendy and um, it will grow.
on 07 September 2005 at 10:15
It’s not growing quite fast enough. So today I am wearing a cute little smocky top (very ‘summer of love’) with my best jeans and kitten-heeled sandals. And dangly earrings. And lippy. I’m not sure anyone’s convinced, though.
on 08 September 2005 at 08:55
They LOVE it – appealing to both sexes.

IKEA outcomes sorry outputs

He is building a MALM. What a man. My sister tells me that in Chicago you can order from IKEA on line and pay $100 to have everything delivered.  Why is it America is so much better at this kind of thing?

Tomorrow we build a bed for the Princess. Our lives are just full, full, full of excitement.


on 10 August 2005 at 12:52

I’m sure we’d be reasonably impressed if we just knew what that was – sounds highly futuristic though – any relation to HAL? 0
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on 10 August 2005 at 19:34

See neither of you has spent enough time in IKEA. All the furniture is lovingly named in Swedish (except for the Billy bookcase and the Carlos desk) and you should know that the MALM is a chest of drawers. 0
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on 11 August 2005 at 10:08

I have. I have spent enough time in IKEA.
*gibbers* 0
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on 11 August 2005 at 19:22

Oh no you haven’t and we had to go back today to exchange bed pieces having picked up the wrong ones in our haste last time. Sigh. 0
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on 12 August 2005 at 10:18

Really I have. And last time I went with Conchita. Oh god. I need a stiff drink …. the horror, the horror …. 0
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on 12 August 2005 at 21:05

That is a funny thought… 0
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on 18 August 2005 at 17:15

I LOVE making up Ikea names!
John – Deer
FFart – bathrobe
bollokks – light fitting
It’s great fun. We should start a blog for it! 0
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on 31 August 2005 at 13:22

BHM – I entirely agree, though I expect my time to be somewhat limited in the future… 0
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on 02 November 2005 at 23:32

PaulBlogtown 0
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Weighty matters

Me: I bought a new dress.  Do you like it? Try to marry truth and tact.

Him: It’s ideal for around the house.

I went for a scan during the week and tested the doctor’s scales, in the interests of everyone’s happiness, we have no weighing scales at home. For your information, the twins now weigh 1.3kgs each. This is average for a single baby at this stage. This means I am twice as large as a normal 7 month pregnant person.  Are you scared?

Me: Do you know what I weigh now?

Him: No.

Me: 71 kilos

Him: Well, you are pregnant with twins etc.

Me: What do you weigh?

Him: You’d really rather not know.


Him: 72 kilos.

Princess (addressing herself to stereo which is playing musical backing to Ella Fitzgerald): Tu joues très bien monsieur.


on 01 August 2005 at 12:49

I could tell you how much I weigh and it would make you feel slender and positively sylph-like- but then I’d have to kill you xx 0
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on 02 August 2005 at 10:57

Mr W is brilliant – ‘it’s alright for round the house’ indeed. I can see why you married him. 0
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on 02 August 2005 at 22:19

Like Minkleberry I could do the same! I’m just seriously hoping my thyroid function is out of kilter else I have some serious dieting and exercising to do. As a pregnant mum of twins consider yourself extremely sylph like! 0
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on 03 August 2005 at 07:28

Are you anorexic? 0
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on 04 August 2005 at 12:41

Stroppy, of course there are no right answers, but he SHOULD have known that. Um, yes, pog. Minks, StarCorner, you know that I measure 163cms in my stockinged feet. I am short alas whereas I am sure that you are both tall and willowy.
Yes, HJB, I worry… 0
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on 05 August 2005 at 18:28

Belg, I love you for thinking I am tall and willowy. Sadly, I am 161 centimetres tall. I envy your extra 2- What does the world look like from up there? 0
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on 05 August 2005 at 20:20

Well, I’m 173cms and never you mind how many kilos and the ultrasound tech said today that my baby was sizewise ‘above average’ and that’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it, dammit. 0
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on 06 August 2005 at 12:51

Minks, you sound tall and willowy and I’m sure it’s all in the mind. That’s what I try to tell myself anyway.
KE, that sounds like an excellent excuse. With the added merit that it may even be true. 0
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Sarcastic Journalist


on 08 August 2005 at 17:13

I think that if I were you, I’d pretend that it just means I can eat THAT MUCH MORE. ���


on 08 August 2005 at 20:02

SJ, now you’re talking! 0
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