LJS squeezed through the crowded bar to the quiet of the snug where Bobble was waiting craning her swanlike neck to see where was.
“Here you go” he panted, “God it’s fierce busy out there, let me draw you a Venn diagramme to show you what I mean”.
Bobble snatched away his pen and said “That won’t be necessary LJS”. He took a sip of Beamish and blinked in surprise, it was bitter. “Something’s up” was his last conscious thought. Bobble gazed thoughtfully at the prone figure beside her. Just how had HJB managed that, she wondered. At that very moment, Norah stepped into the snug looking businesslike. “My God, it is you” gasped Bobble “are you working for…” her voice trailed away. “Yes” said Norah, “I’m working for Heather and I’ve just knocked out LJS with something nasty in his pint”. Bobble winced. “Oh it won’t do him any harm” said Norah bracingly. “But, how do you know Heather and why are you involved and..” Norah cut across Bobble’s questions, “No time for that now, we’ve got to get him to the car waiting outside”. “OK” said Bobble, “I just need to go to the bathroom. “Oh” said Norah “I wouldn’t, one of the staff here is a loo nastier, just come on”. They carried LJS outside. It was late now and he was just another punter who’d had too much to drink being lugged home by his friends. They pushed him into the waiting car and sat in beside him pink from the effort of supporting his manly frame. “Gosh” said Bobble “nice big, vroomy car, pity about the dent at the back”. The car pulled out and drove to the airport.
Back in Brussels, Waffle was on a secure line to HJB “I’ve been thinking about it, get Norah in. I have a lever, I’ve seen a man hanging about her place and then, ..”
“That won’t be necessary, darling, everything has been arranged” said Heather smoothly.
Waffle was impressed, you had to hand it to HJB, her network was extraordinary.
“And” continued HJB inperturbably “she’s got LJS, they’re on their way to the airport now.”
“Have they been seen leaving?” asked Waffle urgently.
“No, darling, relax, everything’s fine” said HJB.
Back in the Long Valley, pog reluctantly took out her mobile phone. She was wearing a green skimpy combat vest which looked amazingly attractive on her perfect figure and drew attention to her elfin, Kate Moss like face. This was her bomb defusing outfit and she’d just finished some work for the army and was having a well earned break.
“Jojo hi, it’s pog, I’ve just seen something odd.”
“Pog, hi, where are you?”
“That’s not important, oh actually, it is, I’m in the Long Valley and I’ve just seen LJS leaving the bar with two women, he was out cold”.
“Well, LJS’s drinking and other habits are hardly important to me” said Jojo coldly.
“Well, it’s not like I care either” said pog briskly “I mean our relationship is dead and buried, but… I remember he could always hold his drink, this isn’t like him.” She paused “I think he’s been abducted”.
“Don’t be ridiculous” said Jojo ” who would abduct him?”
“Heather” said pog succinctly.
“Pog, what do you know about this?” asked Jojo in alarm “Look, don’t move, I’m coming round straight away.”
“I’m going nowhere” said Pog picking up her pint and settling back in her chair. It was going to be a long evening.
Have this to be going on with.Now I know why my arms felt tired this morning.
Zowee! This is getting better and better!
(just one little tiny weeny titchy thing – Heather has the Cindy body. I’m more your Kate. Kinda. Ahem….)
Um, darn (most popular word in the waffle house at the moment replacing the f word, now barred), pog, who’s Kate?
Ta, Norah. Bobble, I’m afraid you have become a bit M&B rose but it’s all your own fault for starting it. I fear you may faint when you see who’s driving the car.
Dearie me, waffle – just how many supermodels are there called Kate? Ay? 😉
Me faint? Darn.
I like to think I have hope of redemption though.
Pog, oh dear, I don’t get much sleep, you know…sigh. Well, Bobble, we’ll see.
Well obviously the pint took him out – Beamish?!? The man’s a blatant Murphy’s drinker after all – none could resist such a shock to the system when they’re not expecting it. (only with extreme preparation before trips to Dublin). Glad to see that maybe…just maybe…there might be a female character actually sympathetic to his plight. Dressing in skimpy outfits just adds to the enjoyment.Good stuff though waff’, the tension is building nicely.
Locotes, you feel he’s a Murphy’s drinker, well, I’ll bow to your superior knowledge, matters will be rectified.
Pog, please note amendment.
Mah’vlous, thank you darling. And so true.