When the Princess was at Oxford, I used to visit occasionally and at some point in this process, herself introduced the schedule.
This has been the best thing for our relationship and everyone’s sanity. Term is busy at college and she would always have lots of things on and need to write essays and study as well. Before the schedule, these things would arise at short notice for me anyway (there is no point expecting me to remember details of a social or academic engagement conveyed to me some time ago) and it was a bit unsatisfactory for both of us. Part of the problem was that I was coming for a relatively long time. I was visiting from Ireland so always came for a couple of nights at least rather than a day or even an afternoon which was much more feasible for parents based in London, say.
The schedule changed all this. I knew when she was available and when not. I was able to get dropped off at the lovely little art museum in Christ Church (recommended) or go to the shops or some other fun thing suggested by herself while she went to her tutorials or whatever. It was, as the annoying expression goes, a game changer.
I am visiting her this weekend (bringing this to you live from a glamorous airport bus station) and the schedule has just dropped and it looks amazing. I am v excited.
The schedule is now a fixture. For example, in summer 2023 I was supposed to join her in Florence for the weekend after she finished her art history course and below is the schedule she prepared. Alas, neither of us got to enjoy it. My favourite aunt died and we went to her funeral instead. But maybe we will live the Florentine adventure another time. As my London sister-in-law says, “Life is long”.
Thursday 20th DOWNTOWN
1pm Arrival
1:17pm Il Santo Bevitore for lunch
3:30pm Uffizi
7:30pm Osteria Antica Mescita San Niccolo
9:45 pm Romeo and Juliet at the Uffizi
Friday 21st SANTO SPIRITO
Brancacci chapel
8:15pm Loggia rooftop
Saturday 22nd NORTH
Museo di San Marco
8pm L’Ortone
Sunday 23rd DOWNTOWN
Market
2pm departure
It’s a lot of work for her but honestly I think she thinks it’s worth it. It’s an opportunity for her to show off a place she knows to me and both of us know what to expect. The effort she puts in to planning and booking things she knows I will like fills me with joy. In some ways no one knows me better than her and she can always judge what I will enjoy so in addition to the warm feeling I get from all her effort, I really look forward to doing the things proposed and they always deliver.
I say all this in case anyone else out there thinks spontaneity can be a bit overrated sometimes.
Also it’s the last day of Nablopomo. Posts next month will be more…spontaneous.