Me: If Dan (my brother) ever gets married his wife is in for a shock.
My mother (indignantly): Why? Your brother is very good you know.
Me: Yes, I know, but he’s not exactly Mr. New Man round the house is he?
My mother: He’s fantastic, before I got my cleaners in regularly he used to do an awful lot around the house.
Me (recognising a lost cause): Yes, ok, he is very good but he does have the odd fault.
My mother: Precious few.
Me: Outraged silence.
Meanwhile, my sister’s project has finally gone live in India. She rang this evening at 1.45 am local time to say that 100 people had been working flat out since 4 that afternoon and they’d just managed to get out an invoice. I didn’t like to say but I did think that maybe writing out the invoice by hand and delivering it on foot would be more efficient.