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Archives for April 2011

A Tale of Love and Home Improvements

1 April, 2011
Posted in: Mr. Waffle

We are getting new windows. I know, just as we are thinking of moving. Don’t be at me. They were scheduled to come early in the morning. I had a meeting first thing and my loving husband was on duty. Inevitably, as I sat in my meeting my phone rang.

Send text to unknown number: Am in mtg.
Have a thought, send follow-up text: Are you windows? If yes, call my husband.
Sit thinking that, if not windows, text will be unfortunate. Phone bleeps.
Message from windows: Sorry its R from [company]. alarming going off.wondering do u have code. cheers.
Reply: Sorry. No idea. We never use it. Try husband.
Message from windows: Cheers he’s here now.
Me to husband: Code might be in house file.
Husband to me: I was able to remember it from 2008. Glad you married me?
Me: Yes.

Health and Safety Notice Emailed to Lucky Employees

4 April, 2011
Posted in: Work

It has come to our attention that there are a number of rats running around the grounds near the North gate entrance. We are contacting a pest control company to come on site to deal with this issue as a matter of urgency. In the meantime, staff are advised to be careful when walking around the grounds and in particular to ensure that entrances to buildings are kept closed to prevent any rats getting into the buildings.

Lovely.

Another First Communion Story

5 April, 2011
Posted in: Dublin, Ireland

This is one from a friend’s taxi driver. He was hired for the day of this little girl’s first communion which, apparently, is quite common. He drove her to the hairdresser, to the dressmaker, to the beautician for her nails and facial and then the child’s mother looked at her watch and said, “You know, we’re running late, we’ll go straight to lunch.” I suppose it might be apocryphal.

Today’s Ludicrous Demand

6 April, 2011
Posted in: Princess

As ever, delivered at 8.45 as we are walking out the door, “Mummy, I need a photograph of you for school.”

Feis Ceoil

6 April, 2011
Posted in: Boys, Daniel, Dublin, Ireland, Michael, Princess

The school had a singing and recitation competition on Saturday. The boys were both very brave but failed to scoop any medals. Michael took this very hard. “I try and I try, but still I don’t win,” he sobbed as the kindly adjudicator mouthed “sorry” at me over his heaving shoulders. The same adjudicator proceeded to award his sister second place in her category which she regarded as no more than her due. If I were giving out medals, I would have given one to Daniel, I think, who did his impression of a child from the Connemara Gaeltacht.

In completely unrelated news, herself walked a neighbour’s child home this afternoon and came back carrying a bag full of swag. Apparently, every day when coming home she, the childminder and the boys, meet a nice lady who lives on the street. The Princess had informed the lady that her birthday was coming, as indeed she has informed everybody. The lady acted on this information and as the Princess was passing her house this afternoon, she came out with various offerings. Unfortunately, the Princess has inherited my sense of direction so she has no idea in which house exactly her benefactress lives nor is she aware of other useful identifiers like the lady’s name. She has composed a thank you letter to hand over next time she meets the lady in the street and that is the best we can do for the moment. Who says the big city is an unfriendly place?

Cultural Differences

8 April, 2011
Posted in: Mr. Waffle

When Mr. Waffle was in France recently, he found himself reading an article in some French mag with tips from female reporters. He says it was very odd, all about how to keep your hair looking good in a war zone (hairspray apparently). Does this happen in magazines in other countries? Discuss.

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