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Princess

Update on Herself

11 February, 2020
Posted in: Princess

Thing one, she is finally taller than me. We’re both delighted really.

Thing two, she was in a documentary film in transition year and now she’s on the poster for the film on her own looking quite cool and moody (though she tells me her role is a small one and that she does not love the picture they have used for the poster). I am very excited and think she looks amazing. She seems to be indifferent, at best. To her absolute mortification, I have messaged the director to see if I can get a hard copy. She is never going to tell me anything ever again, she says. Still, worth it if I can frame the poster and hang it on the landing.

Out and About

28 January, 2020
Posted in: Middle Child, Mr. Waffle, Princess, Reading etc., Twins, Youngest Child

The Alliance Française had a games night and, even though it was a school night, I insisted on bringing the boys and Mr. Waffle. I felt that the boys might enjoy it and that it would be good for their French. In my mind’s eye, I saw them sitting down and bonding with another group of board game-loving teenagers, ideally Francophone board game-loving teenagers, and having a great time while myself and Mr. Waffle went off Bewley’s and had a nice cup of tea. This did not happen. They did not enjoy it, it was not good for their French. It was all grown-ups who came with their own gangs of friends. There were no other teenagers. What was agonising for Michael, in particular, was that these were his people playing his kind of games but with no room for him. We sat in a corner, the four of us and tried to muster enthusiasm for playing in French games which we could equally readily have played at home and despite the enthusiasm and helpfulness of the librarian doling out games, it could not really be called anything but an abysmal failure. Alas.

We went to see Knives Out in the cinema and, unlike everyone else in Ireland, I thought it was only alright. The others enjoyed it though. We also went to see JoJo Rabbit which I enjoyed in a mild way but found myself distracted by the woman in the row in front who kept her phone on throughout: messaging, whatsapping, posting to instagram. It was spectacularly annoying but I was too craven to tap her on the shoulder and say something in case she was cross with me and I had to sit behind her for the rest of the film which would ruin it for me. So I sat there stewing in bitterness.

Herself bought us theatre tickets for Christmas which was a bit over-generous given her very limited budget, poor mite, but anyway they were for Drama at Inish at the Abbey which I found surprisingly enjoyable. I had thought it was going to be something like The Playboy of the Western World or the Beauty Queen of Leenane – all a bit West of Ireland gloom – but it’s not. It’s by Lennox Robinson (who was from Douglas in Cork, I mean, who knew?). It was written in the 30s and it’s about a group of actors who go to a seaside resort in East Cork (clearly Youghal) and put on works by Chekhov, Ibsen and Strindberg. The residents take the plays to heart and start acting like characters in the plays. I feel I would have got more out of it had I been a bit more familiar with the source material but still not bad at all. Annoyingly, the man in the row behind me seemed to find it knee-slappingly funny and I felt a bit short-changed when I considered his hilarity compared to my mild amusement but there you go. Inevitably, at the end there was a standing ovation. I can’t remember the last time I went to a play in Dublin when there hasn’t been a standing ovation. I feel it’s a slightly devalued currency at this stage.

Mr. Waffle and I were invited to a Burns night supper by friends. His mother was Scottish so I suppose this was why they got into this in the first place. It was in the Royal Saint George yacht club in Dun Laoghaire organised by the Dublin Scottish Benevolent Society of St. Andrew. In advance we regarded it with some trepidation as we both had head colds but we were sufficiently recovered on the night to have a good time. The Burns night supper was completely unknown to me as a thing in advance and I had never tasted haggis in my life. My friend helpfully described it as being a bit like a wedding with speeches after dinner and some singing. An early highlight was the “Ode to a Haggis” which was delivered with great verve. Also, I found that I really like haggis – it’s delicious. The speeches, I understand, follow an unwavering pattern with a speech on Robert Burns “The Immortal Memory”; “A Toast to the Lassies” and “A Toast to the Laddies”. I found myself sitting right in front of the speakers which was fine until the singer sang one of Burns’s numbers (A Man’s a Man for A’That) unaccompanied and very loudly, eyes closed, face puce and about two feet from me. It was a little overwhelming. He sang a couple of later numbers accompanying himself on the guitar and I found these less stressful. We toasted the President and the Queen of England. I don’t remember doing the latter before in this jurisdiction. Since the yacht club still has the Union Jack engraved in the top of its gilt edged mirror it all felt a little odd. But Dun Laoghaire is a bit odd that way.

The speech on Burns was fine – continuing the Abbey Theatre theme it was delivered by one of co-directors of the Abbey, a Scot, Graham McLaren. I wonder how much he is enjoying that role as the Abbey always seems to have a couple of controversies on the boil. Anyway, to Burns, I have to say, I knew he was an important Scottish poet but hadn’t quite realised his role in the Scottish national psyche (I should have guessed from earlier when Mr. Waffle showed me a picture from a Scottish friend of his who is married to an Austrian – it showed her slightly grumpy, Austrian teenage son, decked out in his kilt for Burns night in Vienna). The “Immortal Toast” man gave lots of Robert Burns and his influence on me and Scotland stories.

The highlight of the toast to the lassies was a rather drunken heckler sitting at the table behind me who roared at the speaker that it was “RAbbie Burns, not RObbie Burns!” There was some communal singing which I enjoyed very much and which felt oddly like mass. And we sang “Auld Lang Syne”.

Our friends who invited us are members of the organising society and they were allowed to bring up to four people. In advance they explained that we would be joined by four other people at our table of ten. Our friends said that last year they had worried about what old fogies they might be put beside only to find themselves beside four people in their 20s and realising that they were the old fogies.

There were quite a few people there whom I knew from other contexts including a good friend of mine (who is also, coincidentally a colleague of our host, yes, Ireland is tiny and we all know each other) who was there with her Scottish husband (appropriately attired in kilt) and who was actually put at our table but tragically between our group of 6 and her and her husband there was a couple (lovely people I am sure etc.) unknown to any of us so that was a little unfortunate.

Overall though, a rather thrilling and exciting new experience to have at my vast age. Recommended.

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Matters Mouth Related

26 January, 2020
Posted in: Hodge, Middle Child, Princess, Twins, Youngest Child

The cat somehow managed to hurt her nose. She may have got into a fight. Unclear. Mr. Waffle took her to the vet (which she did not enjoy) and the vet pronounced her to be basically fine and we should just wait and let her get better. €60 we will never see again. Sigh. Anyhow to skip to the finish, she did recover, but in the intervening fortnight she was unable to lick herself clean. Who knew a cat could become so revoltingly smelly. That licking behind the ears regime is startlingly effective.

Meanwhile, herself had another appointment with the medieval torturer who is passing himself off as an orthodontist. Honestly, if I had known at the start how much prolonged misery it would involve, I would never have started. I mean all she had was one little snaggle tooth (as our American cousins say) and it was actually quite cute and characterful. The orthodontist has now applied those dreadful elastic bands which are attached by hooks on the inside of her mouth. The pain, the poor child. She told me that the dental nurse said to her that she couldn’t go until she had put on the bands herself. It took her about 2 attempts. The dental nurse sighed and said, “It’s always the same, girls can do it straight away but boys take about 14 tries.” She speculated that it might be because girls look at themselves in the mirror more. It’s possible, I suppose. When she returned home, bloody, battered and elasticated, her brothers’ words of comfort were uncomforting. Daniel offered, “Now there is no food that you can’t readily turn into a catapult.” Michael said, “Isn’t it a good thing that I have perfect teeth?”

And in final tooth news, Daniel’s front tooth was declared dead by the dentist and he had his root canal treatment (€450 but cheap compared to the braces). Daniel said the procedure wasn’t too bad and he was quite cheerful during and after even though he had to lie there for a good hour with his mouth open. I took him for a bun afterwards and he ate it up with every appearance of enthusiasm.

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He then took himself off to GAA training that evening without a bother. All in all it appears to have been far less painful than his sister’s brace tightening which is something, I suppose. I have to go to the dentist for my regular check up next month. I’m not sure I can face any more mouth related trauma, so let’s hope it passes off peacefully.

An Exchange giving an Insight into the Personality of each Family Member

25 January, 2020
Posted in: Middle Child, Mr. Waffle, Princess, Twins, Youngest Child
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Where is Michael, you might be wondering. Yeah, he’s ignoring our petty earthly concerns.

Christmas Round Up

31 December, 2019
Posted in: Cork, Family, Ireland, Middle Child, Mr. Waffle, Princess, Siblings, Twins, Youngest Child

Daniel read at the carol service on the Friday evening before Christmas and he was absolutely fantastic. I was very proud of him. Mr. Waffle tends to regard our children’s successes and failures as their own but I regard everything as a reflection on me and I basked vicariously in his glory. The carols were nice too.

On Sunday we had our Christmas drinks party. Every year I am in the horrors in prospect and then quite pleased with it when in progress and delighted with myself afterwards. This year was no different. We had a moment of suprise when Daniel said, as I stood poised with a toothpick over a cocktail sausage, “I think those are the ones Michael puts in his mouth.” “And puts back in the box?” I asked in horror. Apparently so. Anyhow we had an unopened packet and we spoke to Michael about toothpicks being a single use item so a win overall.

On December 23, I queued outside Sheridan’s cheesemongers in town for 20 minutes. It was a small price to pay as my sister-in-law was making Christmas dinner but I think we can take it as a sign that the Dublin economy is still doing just fine.

It was a busy couple of days. For all of us, apparently.

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On Christmas Eve, the children and I met and an old friend of mine and his children. We’ve been doing this for about 10 years now so that makes it a festive tradition, I suppose. I found old pictures of when the children were smaller and he and I were quite nostalgic. My children were politely indifferent.

When we got home, Mr. Waffle told us that the toilet seat upstairs had broken. I thought it a bit unlikely that he would succeed on his hunt for a replacement on Christmas Eve but I underestimated him. A Christmas miracle.

We went to midnight mass (starts at 9, over by 10.30) and so we had a pretty relaxed Christmas morning with no one up before 9.

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Christmas presents this year were pretty successful overall. I rolled over Mr. Waffle’s subscription to the Economist and did not get him a copy of “Surveillance Capitalism” about which I had given strong hints and which filled him with fear because all he really wanted was the new Ross O’Carroll Kelly book which I dutifully delivered.

As we were going out to dinner herself did us all an amazingly elaborate Christmas breakfast which we all enjoyed though she was slightly frazzled. Christmas lunch with the cousins was very good and entirely labour free although Mr. Waffle and I felt a bit guilty; we’ll have them around for dinner in the new year.

Mr. Waffle and the children refused to go orienteering on St. Stephen’s Day but we did go for a walk so there was that. I was not as pleased by the situation as this picture might lead you to believe but my children were an absolute delight.

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We did very little on the 27th and headed down to Cork on the 28th. We decided to have lunch in Milano’s in town when we got to Cork before pushing on to grace the relatives with our presence. I was ill-prepared for parking in town. I decided I would test out the city council’s park by phone service, it is not effective. I am €10 poorer and I still had to scoot off to buy parking discs – I met two traffic wardens and they told me that the park by phone service was down; where I might buy discs and that they would not clamp my car while I was gone. This is perhaps not fascinating but I had to get it off my chest. It ended up costing me €20 for an hour’s parking.

Nonetheless we went on to my parents’ house in reasonably good order. My sister and brother always get very extravagant presents for the children (and indeed me) and this year the children, yet again, cleaned up.

I gave my father a new cap – sorely needed – and it may have been my most successful present of the year. He wore it to mass on Sunday and we both thought it looked pretty good. He was chirpy on Sunday and as he and I drove back from mass together (leaving the others to toil on foot) we reprised together some of the more popular carols performed by the choir.

My brother, the boys and I went ice skating together which was moderately successful. We went to Kinsale for a walk with my sister. As I said cheerfully to my little group as I ushered them in to the car, “It’s not actually raining.” The children dutifully posed for the now traditional “caution children” shot.

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After an hour or so patiently waiting outside in the damp, we finally got our lunch in the Bulman. While we were queuing, my sister’s friend came with her husband, her five year old, her brother and her 83 year old father. We chatted. Mr. Waffle suggested that we should give them our place in the queue. The rest of us were heartless. He is a better person than us but we were hungrier than him. Happily we were all seated at more or less the same time so the terrible ethical dilemma did not arise. Then we went on to Charles Fort which, alas, was closed. Curse you, OPW.

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My sister and I went for a wander around the craft shops of the town and Mr. Waffle and the children went home (having driven to Kinsale in two cars which was handy if not ecologically sound). By the time I got back to Cork that evening, I was starting to feel ill. I was sick as a dog last night and was not wellfor our drive back to Dublin this morning but here I am in the comfort of my own home with as much lemsip at my disposal as I may need to see in the new year.

A very happy new year to you all and hope Christmas went well for you too.

December to Date

19 December, 2019
Posted in: Dublin, Ireland, Middle Child, Princess, Twins, Youngest Child

It has been busy here in Waffle towers. Lots of seasonal things: present buying; tree purchasing; card sending; Christmas partying.

We went to see “A Christmas Carol” in the Gate on Tuesday night. It was a pricey enough family outing. It might have been more successful had the children been a bit younger or, in the case of herself, more cheerful. She was tired, it was a school night, she had lots to do and we were forcing her to be there. All true but not information delivered in a manner calculated to please her mother who had envisaged a fun Christmas outing. “I’m not sitting beside Michael,” she said, “as we filed into our seats, “he makes noises when he consumes culture.” This set the tone somewhat. The second part was better than the first and, at the end, Michael hopped up and gave an enthusiastic standing ovation. He was standing alone for quite a while but, in the end, he brought the theatre with him and everyone stood up.

On the way out, I got chatting to an elderly gentleman (typical enough of the patrons of the Gate) who was making slow progress out due to a bad knee. “You would never think,” said he conversationally, “that I was once the Irish under 17 sprint champion but I was. I met Jesse Owens, I knew Jesse Owens. Did you know that the person who first got him interested in running was an Irish-American in his school called Charlie Reilly?” I did not but I’m willing to bet he was in a religious order. The children upbraided me for talking to random strangers and we went home.

I got my annual haircut. My hairdresser firmly resisted my requests to chop it all off but it is, at least, a good deal shorter.

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We have carols in the church on Friday night – Daniel is doing a reading; we’re having some people around for drinks on Sunday afternoon and then my last day of work before the holidays is Monday; I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that it is unlikely to be anyone’s most productive day at work.

How are your own preparations progressing?

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