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Archives for 19 March, 2008

Hubris

19 March, 2008
Posted in: Mr. Waffle

I am constantly in search of presents for Mr. Waffle because he is difficult to buy for and Christmas and birthdays come round every year with monotonous regularity.

A couple of months ago, I saw that he had cut out from the paper a book review so, stealthily, I went to the bookshop and ordered the book.   I paid for it, I had it gift wrapped and I stashed it in the bottom of the wardrobe.

A short time ago, we were going through our piles of stuff on the desk and I innocently picked up the review and said: “ooh what’s this?”

“It’s a review of a book set in Brussels and I thought it looked interesting” he said.  Cue much inner glee and outward indifference on my part.  “But you can throw it out, I looked at some sample pages of the book on the internet and it’s really dull”.

He got it today anyway and expressed suitable (but, presumably, utterly feigned) enthusiasm.

It probably wouldn’t be so bad, if he didn’t keep buying me perfect presents.

Mistaken Preconceptions

19 March, 2008
Posted in: Work

We have a new English trainee in the office; a pleasant, bright, confident, articulate 22 year old man who doesn’t read any fiction and who likes going out drinking with his mates. Are you getting a picture here?

Me: Do you belong to the generation of English children who were not taught grammar in school?

Him: Yes.

Me: Alas.

Him: I know we should really have been taught Latin as well.

Me: You laugh…

Him (indignantly): I am not laughing, it’s a disgrace that they don’t teach Latin in schools any more, it’s dead useful for learning grammar rules and stuff.

Me: Are you serious?

Him: Of course I’m serious. It’s a disgrace.

Me: Are you channelling my father by any chance?

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