That line comes from something. Can I find it in the richness of the internet? I can not. I thought it was from “The Lovesong of J. Alfred Prufrock” but it’s not. I offer you:
I grow old … I grow old …
I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled.
So, tomorrow, I will be 45.
This is what it is like to be 45.
1. I can feel a draft. I am constantly saying, “Close the door!”
2. I really wanted an airtight biscuit tin for Christmas. Nothing says Christmas like an airtight biscuit tin.
3. I bought a new winter coat from Windsmoor.
4. I rely on my children to make me aware of the latest internet viral video. In fact, are there videos any more?
5. I love to stay in with a book or the internet. In Chesterton’s short story “The Strange Crime of John Boulnois”, John Boulnois says “.. sitting in that chair with that story I was as happy as a schoolboy on a half-holiday. It was security, eternity–I can’t convey it… the cigars were within reach…the matches were within reach… the Thumb had four more appearances to…it was not only a peace, but a plenitude.” I am not a cigar smoker but I know what he means. Incidentally, to my knowledge we have three copies of the Fr Brown short stories in the house. Could I find one? No but the internet provided.
6. I love being on my own.
7. I love BBC radio 4, I really do. Not as much as my father who has, for as long as I can remember, had it on all night – very loudly – on his bedside table, but a lot. Even stupid old “Money Box Live” and “You and Yours”.
8. I find music in pubs VERY loud.
9. When I see teenagers, I frequently find myself thinking variants of what is that child wearing/she’s a lovely looking child, if only she would wear some nice clothes/is that the fashion, I wonder.
10. My parents are old and, alas, ill. I love my siblings and enjoy spending time with them. Even my extremely annoying brother.
11. I find a basket on my bicycle really handy. What is the point of dropped handlebars? Cycling makes me feel slightly smug.
12. I am not always sure what day of the week it is offhand. Or what age I am. I can usually make a good guess.
13. My children have reached the age where they can largely entertain themselves but they still love me.
14. I like to go hill walking with my husband.
15. I feel stretched in all directions; work is busy; home is busy; my parents are old and live 250kms away. In the evenings, there is always a pile of domestic administration awaiting my attention.
16. I like home improvement shows on the television. You wondered where the audience was for those programmes; your hunt is over.
17. I generally only see my friends at my bookclubs and at lunch.
18. I book my holidays 6 months in advance.
19. I like classical music in the background as I eat my breakfast and read the paper.
20. I like to do things in the garden.
You may wish me happy birthday.