Siblings

Plague Diary – Part XIV

29 June, 2020
Posted in: Cork, Dublin, Family, Ireland, Middle Child, Mr. Waffle, Princess, Siblings, Travel, Twins, Youngest Child

Monday, June 15, 2020

My sister sent us a care package – gifts for all! It was very thrilling. She sent me a new pair of very expensive headphones and they are complex to use but, ultimately, I expect to get on top of it.

It was my mother’s anniversary and I was a bit sad but alright really.

My little niece in London was three and her mother assured us that she liked the books we sent. She herself wasn’t entirely prepared to commit herself.

I had written a letter to my friend in America a while ago and she rang me to thank me for it and we chatted and she asked whether we were still going on holidays to America this summer. We are not (â‚¬5,000 in flights which, I fear, we will never get back, so bitter – I may have covered this previously – at least we got our accommodation money back, I suppose). She asked whether we would like to go to their summer house in Kinsale in July as, for obvious reasons, they are not going themselves this year. I decided that yes, we would. We are still tussling over payment; she refuses to accept any, Mr. Waffle insists, we’re at stalemate. Anyway, we’re going which is great, it’s a lovely house in Sandycove outside the town with beautiful views and adjacent Cork city. Hurrah. In other news, she and her husband are doctors and were fearing the worst in Vermont but she said that, somewhat to her surprise, it’s been fine there. So good for them.

Mr. Waffle went out to visit his mother for the first time since March. Nursing home visits are re-starting very slowly. She seemed ok but it was all a bit strange he said. He swung by his parents’ house which his brother is in the process of cleaning out and picked up an old round table which he thought would be good for the kitchen here. When he got it home, he reconstructed it in the utility room and it wouldn’t fit through the door to the kitchen so, now it lives there.

Herself got a notification that she was a finalist in an essay competition and was pleased.

Dan and I cycled to the re-opened public tennis courts after work. Dan was nearly hit by a speeding car (traffic is not yet back to normal and cars out and about are pretty speedy). It was so close that I actually felt physically ill afterwards and really wasn’t in form to play tennis which was just as well as all the courts were full and there was a big queue of people waiting to get on. We could really do with some extra cycle lanes round here.

Tuesday, June 16, 2020

My sister sent me a bunch of flowers for Mum’s anniversary but they only arrived today due to a mix up. My mother loved to have flowers in the house and so do I. I felt a bit tearful which was strange because the day before had been fine but it was the thoughtfulness of the flowers that did for me. Needless to say, I had sent her nothing.

I put them on my home office desk.

My friend R who is now retired and puts in time in a charity shop in Ranelagh tells me that they have a complete set of the most recent version of the full Oxford English Dictionary (1989 apparently) in 20 volumes and unless someone buys it soon it’s going to be pulped. â‚¬300 or nearest offer, I understand. A bit tragic, but who has room for 20 volumes of dictionaries?

I showed Daniel a photograph of my bookclub and he said in surprise, “I had no idea that they were all so old.” Alas.

Herself finally went back to the orthodontist and he snapped off the piece of metal that has been gouging holes in the side of her mouth for the last three months. So a win on that front but she has been too assiduous in putting on her bands (apparently most people don’t follow direction and they allow for that, honestly) and now she has to undergo some other hellish process. Alas.

I overheard herself and Mr. Waffle speaking in the kitchen. She said, “Mum believes saints are everyone who goes to heaven and not just those identified by the church.” I called out from the other room, “And I’m right.” She said, “Well we’ll only really know if you’re right when we’re dead.” Hmm.

Today was Bloomsday. Having listened to the audio book earlier this year, I felt uniquely ready but it wasn’t really the year to show off my newly acquired knowledge.

Wednesday, 17 June, 2020

Mr. Waffle went into town and bought us a new magimix the old one having finally died after many years of faithful service. He said it was pretty weird in the shops.

My father was finally discharged from hospital so that evening after work, I drove to Cork to see him. I found packing strange after all these months of staying at home. I had a letter from my father’s GP saying he was pretty ill (to cover my travelling about 230kms beyond the permitted 20kms) but in the event, no one stopped me. It’s funny because you think everyone is out there living it up travelling all over the country but they’re not. There were hardly any cars on the Dublin-Cork road and most of the traffic was freight.

I arrived to Cork and helped my father to bed. I thought I could stay 2 metres away but that was completely unrealistic. He really needed help walking and getting in to bed and taking off his shoes (one of his big toes points up in the air, a side effect of stroke he told me, he knew what it’s called in Latin but I have forgotten) and I wasn’t really in a position to stand 2 metres away and say, “Good luck with that” as he keeled over. I did wear my mask though which was quite disastrous as he is very deaf and, at the best of times, finds it hard to hear. He was really quite unwell and a bit grumpy but it was very nice to see him all the same.

My brother (an enthusiastic cyclist) told me that he had cycled to Kinsale (about 30 kms away) on Tuesday. When he was just outside the town, his chain had broken. As he was walking along the side of the road, a friend of his from school passed, picked him up and gave him a lift back to Cork. I mean, what are the odds? Not sure whether it was entirely coronavirus compliant but what was he to do?

Thursday, June 18, 2020

I was jerked awake at regular intervals all night by Radio 4 which was on at top volume. I would drift off and then be woken up by a new voice on the radio. At 6 in the morning, I could stand it no longer and marched in to my father’s bedroom to turn it off. I forgot to wear my mask. He was delighted to see me as I could help him get up. I refused on the grounds that it was much too early. He accepted this but as I was leaving asked me to turn on the radio again. Largely a defeat then.

Later, I helped him up and, after giving him breakfast, ensconced my father in his armchair downstairs. I set up my home office in the dining room and he asked me to leave the door open into the drawing room. “I like to hear the voices.” “Of course,” I said. I was summoned at regular intervals to do things – find glasses, find tissues, find his wallet. I was also quite busy at work and I had a whole new appreciation of what my brother and sister in Cork have to deal with.

I particularly enjoyed the moment when I was having a meeting and he summoned me. “I told you I was in a meeting, Dad,” I said grumpily. “But I didn’t hear you talking,” said he, utterly unfazed.

At lunch time I went into the market in Cork to buy the wherewithal for my favourite ham sandwich. It felt pretty much like usual, maybe a bit emptier and there was someone regulating the flow of people in and out, and a lot more perspex than previously.

In the late afternoon, I persuaded my father to have a ham sandwich too. “He won’t have dinner now,” said my brother gloomily. I was amazed but my brother turned out to be quite right. My poor father, he has got so thin and frail. This is 95, I suppose. Good ham sandwich though.

That evening the internet went down. I rejoiced because my father was unable to listen to his internet radio. I am sorry but there it is.

Friday, June 19, 2020

I worked away until early afternoon and then took my half day. My morning was interrupted by regular requests from my father next door. My favourite being when I was on to a colleague asking about some work she was doing and he summoned me. I said I’d call her back and went in to him, “Is that someone who works for you?” he asked. “Yes,” I said. “Should you not be more formal and firm?” he asked. “What do you mean?” I said. He said, “I heard you ask whether she had holiday plans.” Dear God in heaven. “I thought it was an emergency,” I said grumpily, “you’re like the boy who cried wolf.” “Well,” said my father, “he was right once.” Later, I was on to another colleague and she said, “Anne, sorry but is that ‘The Archers’ playing very loudly in the background?” This working from home lark can be a bit of a strain.

I spent some time talking to my father about family history. The only new piece of information he gave me was that his father had been called, “Copper”. His father died when my father was 10 and he had no idea why he had this nickname. He had just overheard someone point him out as “Copper’s son”. A mystery.

I visited my 90 year old aunt in the afternoon, mask at the ready. She was not keen on the mask. “Are you worried about getting coronavirus?” she asked. “No, I’m worried about giving it to you.” She was unconvinced and persisted in trying to get me to take off my mask. I resisted. I wished her a happy birthday for the following day when she would turn 91. “It’s a great age,” she said happily (she’s in such good nick), “although your father is 95 and he was always delicate as a child.” Just goes to show. “Do you have any idea why your father was nicknamed ‘Copper’?” I asked her. “Yes, he had red hair.” I mean who knew? There’s a mystery resolved for my father after many years.

There were some extra bikes in the shed in Cork, not as healthy as they might be but my sister encouraged me to take them back to Dublin with me for repair and passing on to the boys as as they are far too big for their own bikes.

I said farewell to my elderly relatives really, really glad I had seen them and hopeful that I had not infected them coming as I did from plague infested Leinster. My sister and I went for a short walk and then I hopped into the car to go home.

I was welcomed at home with the kind of enthusiasm I thought was gone for ever. The kind of enthusiasm that small children have for their parents. They all ran into the hall to hug me. Very gratifying. The shed in Dublin is now bike central.

I was home just in time for cinema night, we had been told that we would move to Phase 3 on June 29. I’m getting a bit confused about what phase involves what and when they begin and end but rejoicing etc. and good news that real GAA training begins July 1. We had “I, Tonya” for cinema night and it was very good but something lighthearted would be welcome.

Saturday, June 20, 2020

My sister rang me to tell me that my father fell over soon after I left the house in Cork. He seems to be ok but a bit shaken. I wouldn’t really call it a great omen.

My aunt’s 91st birthday; I got her a subscription to Slightly Foxed. Let us hope that she likes it and remembers that I am the donor.

Daniel and I had zoom GAA. He did his reps, I did the zooming. We are old hands at this stage. Mr. Waffle has done some kind of online training for GAA parents to ensure they understand social distancing for the return to real training.

I got a notification from my Sunday afternoon bookclub that our hostess was considering a real live meeting on July 16. I was filled with delight.

As well as the bikes, I took from Cork my mother’s toasted sandwich maker bought in Brittany about 40 years ago. It has served us faithfully since but they don’t use it much in Cork any more so I asked to bring it to Dublin. Still an excellent piece of kit. Behold the toasted egg sandwich; our own invention.

Herself went out to a friend’s house. The portrait of the children arrived. I still don’t love it. Alas. Oh well. It started to feel like life was really getting back to normal.

Sunday, June 21, 2020

It was actual Father’s Day. The children made cards for their father but actual presents after the previous weekend’s efforts were thin on the ground. He didn’t seem to mind. It was the longest day of the year. The weather was beautiful. We went out to Howth. The traffic was bumper to bumper but we got there eventually. I made them listen to Bagatelle in the car because I am determined to pass on my irremediably uncool musical tastes to my children. We swam in the sea (well, three of us did, Michael and Mr. Waffle resisted) and it was a lovely, lovely afternoon.

Monday, June 22, 2020

Busy day at work again. Herself went to a party that evening for her friend’s 18th. Five people only she assured me but I felt a bit unsure whether this was a good idea although within the rules. I had my Monday night bookclub via zoom and suggested tentatively that our next meeting might be in the flesh but this was vetoed. I felt a bit chastened.

Tuesday, June 23, 2020

Yet another trying day at work. Daniel went out to play basketball with a friend which he really enjoyed. It feels like maybe the beginning of the end.

We spent all dinner talking about flags of the world. I am not a flag fan. They children all know a lot about flags. I blame their father.

Mr. Waffle and I looked at holiday homes in Ireland for August. There are none.

Mr. Waffle bought a book from a German academic publisher. They love their titles.

Wednesday, June 24, 2020

Yet another immensely trying day in the salt mines. It may be for this reason that I ate them all at lunch time because the dish washer had not been unloaded and reloaded. This is the children’s task and it is pretty much constant.

Daniel had his last Wednesday night zoom training. We rejoice.

Thursday, June 25, 2020

After my grumpiness the previous day, Daniel was up at 9 unloading the dishwasher. I felt a bit guilty but, you know, pleased that the dishwasher was unloaded.

Saintly Mr. Waffle has spent the week wrestling with the children’s online school book purchasing website. He finally got past the impressive obstacles put in his way and next year’s school books have been bought.

Daniel made us all pizza for dinner and we had it in the garden as the weather was fine and it all felt festive and holiday like and after dinner we played cards which was fun too. It was a nice evening towards the end of a tough week.

Friday, June 26, 2020

I talked to my Cork friend in Brussels by video call. A big corona virus dividend the video calling with friends abroad.

The children had their second last zoom call with their French language tutor who has been coming live from Paris twice a week – we promised it would finish end June so next Tuesday is the absolute last day. I think both they and the tutor really welcome this but it has worked pretty well.

Later, I went into town with herself to pick up an elaborate breakfast we had ordered which we planned to serve the following day.

We went to the bread shop to get bread but they were sold out. However, they gave herself a free bun so not a dead loss.

Mr. Waffle made sourdough bread but it was…unsuccessful. One of our lessons of lock down may be that home made sourdough is not for us.

Meanwhile Daniel had a first piano lesson with a neighbour up the road. His uncle who is a very good piano player has a keyboard he can lend him and he can practice on that. He’s quite excited. Please let us not speak of the reasons we do not have a piano.

After the success of the previous evening, I decided we would eat out again and stuck some burgers on the barbecue and dispatched herself and Mr. Waffle to the vegan chipper nearby for some suitable treats. By the time they came back, it was lashing and we had to cart everything back in again. Alas.

All the details of what phase 3 would involve were published, it feels like almost back to normal though not quite.

The Greens agreed to go into government and we finally have a new government after months of negotiations. V excitingly we have a Cork Taoiseach for the first time since 1979. Some mild local colour at the link for Cork enthusiasts.

Herself had a zoom session to hear whether she had won the essay competition but, alas, she had not. Oh well, she gets a goodie bag for being a finalist so there’s that.

After a day of many excitements, we sat down to watch “The Blues Brothers” for cinema night. Cast of thousands. V. successful.

Saturday, 27 June, 2020

I was so grumpy. Inexplicably so. I think perhaps it’s because we’re entering a new phase of what the French call “dÃ©confinement” and I’m not quite sure what comes next.

Herself put together our breakfast and it was excellent.

I went out and picked rubbish with the neighbours for an hour or so. The grabber I got for my birthday (still a weird present choice) proved very useful. It lashed on us. Middle aged delights.

My saintly husband felt I might need to get out, so we cycled into town and then signed up for the new electric bike hire service. We picked up a couple of bikes and whizzed around the city centre delighted with ourselves. Not as good on the uphill as we might have hoped and a bit expensive but pretty good fun all the same. And then we had takeaway tea and a bun outside. Food served and made by someone else. The excitement. Also, some cygnets in Stephen’s Green.

My sister told me that Cork local radio has nothing on but profiles of the new Taoiseach. When I was in Cork, I asked my father if he had ever met the last Cork Taoiseach, Jack Lynch. Apparently once on the train shortly after Jack Lynch became Taoiseach and he walked up and down the train shaking hands with all the passengers.

Sunday, 28 June, 2020

As we get ready to move into phase 3, it really feels like the end of an era. I know colleagues with small children can send them back to childcare on Monday and I think it’s going to make things a lot easier though I expect that there will be a side order of guilt with that.

It was a breezy, blustery day and, aside from a short walk outside, it feels like Mr. Waffle and I spent all day looking for holiday accommodation in Ireland. There is almost none. We have one week in August booked. This does not much of a holiday make, I have to tell you. More searching to follow.

And tomorrow, I’m in to the office in town for the first time since the end of March. It feels so strange. I won’t be going back every day from now on but much more regularly, I imagine.

And next week, my menfolk are finally getting their hair cut.

And there’s a second Cork Taoiseach – here he is having a walk around in his constituency. There are definitely some people in the crowd who are not of his political persuasion but, a Cork Taoiseach is a Cork Taoiseach.

Probably a good moment to end the plague diary for the moment.

Do you feel that it’s over or is this only the calm before the second storm?

Plague Diary – Part XIII

14 June, 2020
Posted in: Dublin, Ireland, Middle Child, Mr. Waffle, Princess, Siblings, Twins, Youngest Child

Friday, June 5, 2020

It was a bit showery again. The government said that on Monday we will be moving to level 2+. The plus is new. Apparently from Monday you will be able to drive 20kms from where you are and anywhere within your own county. As someone from the largest county in Ireland who now lives in one of the smallest, I am, understandably, bitter. I mean, a radius of 20 kms from where I am would almost let me travel the whole of Co. Dublin anyhow whereas in Cork, you could go from Allihies to Youghal which, in case you’re curious, is 178 kms.

Also, Mr. Waffle’s mother’s nursing home is allowing outdoor visits so we can go and visit next week. And the shops are re-opening.

I made my first Lidl middle aisle purchase earlier in the week – the new Artemis Fowl book. The children are a bit old for it now but Daniel read it with some enthusiasm and finished it off today. All three of them reminisced fondly about reading Artemis Fowl on the Nintendo when they were younger. On the Nintendo? Apparently it was a thing. They said that the font was in huge comic sans and you could only get about two lines per screen but they liked it. I’m surprised it appealed when Super Mario was available and I don’t know what possessed us to buy it when we had the actual books but it must have seemed a good idea at the time.

For cinema night, Mr. Waffle picked Erin Brockovich which I haven’t seen since it came out about 20 years ago but which held up reasonably well. Still not as good as Catch Me, If You Can which remains the family favourite.

All hell broke loose on the neighbourhood whatsapp group about the proposed trial bollards at the end of the road. Needless to say, I am all in favour (it would make our road a cul de sac and prioritise walking and cycling) but it turns out that at least two households are very much not in favour. Our road is rather richer in legal professionals than is strictly required and my favourite intervention of the night was, “That is a partial argument, with respect.” Cravenly, I ranged myself with the silent majority and said nothing. I’ve already signed the petition.

Saturday, June 6, 2020

Up with the lark for Daniel’s GAA training. The coach says they won’t be able to train together until after June 29 and no matches for the foreseeable. Another 1,000 reps.

Our friend who lives in the Netherlands rang for a chat. Her eldest finished school this year – it made me feel very old to hear that he has finished school, I remember when he was a baby. No exams for him due to Corona virus but he’s off to college in Leiden in the autumn. Mostly online apparently but some on site lab work. How strange this all is.

Herself got her English exam back and was quite pleased with the kind words from her teacher. She continues to hate Paul Durcan though.

The internet appeared to have died pretty definitively; in a fit of desperation, Michael managed to revive it. A miracle. A new modem is to be supplied to us all the same. The children may die of boredom. And it’s raining out.

I have to say I felt something close to despair at the endless unvarying repetitiveness of it all.

The lock on back door (the fancy bi-fold door that the builder warned us would be nothing but trouble) broke and the people who sold it to us weren’t at all sure when they would be able to send someone out to repair it.

Sunday, June 7, 2020

An all round grumpy day. Nothing to report other than that the cleaning rota is still with us and we all hate it.

Monday, June 8, 2020

I was woken at 3 in the morning by an unexpected noise and instantly began compiling a list of stealable items in the house: 5 mobile phones; 4 laptops; three tablets; 2 wifi boosters and a partridge in a pear tree. It was not burglars taking advantage of our unlockable back door. Not sure what it was; rat party perhaps?

Last week there were window cleaners next door and I asked them could they do ours as well. They turned up somewhat unexpectedly but I was delighted to see them and they did an amazing job. I had no idea that clean windows could be quite so thrilling.

The council have confirmed that we are having trial bollards installed at the end of the month. I am delighted. Mr. “That is a partial argument, with respect” left the neighbourhood Whatsapp group where everyone piled in congratulating the residents’ committee on their achievement. He may feel that he is not amongst kindred spirits. If you’re good, I might post a picture of the bollards when they go in. Yes, indeed, this is the kind of knuckle whitening ride that I am willing to bring you on.

Enthused by the successes of the day – window cleaning, bollard installing – I cut back a tree in the back garden which has been driving me crazy.

Tuesday, June 9, 2020

Herself went to the park to meet a friend.

After I’d finished work for the day, Mr. Waffle and I went for a walk. We saw a swan and six cygnets which was delightful but you’ll have to take my word for it as I left my phone with camera at home.

One of our neighbours asked for an old golf ball on the whatsapp group. We met her on our walk and asked what on earth she wanted a golf ball for. Apparently, one of her hens is pecking her own eggs and it will make her stop. I’d say it might. Today is bird information day.

Wednesday, June 10, 2020

I was summoned from sleep good and early by Daniel who brought the unlovely tidings that the cat had been sick on his bed.

I’m a bit baffled about the various lock down rules and phases at this stage. We’ve thrown out the original thing we stuck up on the radiator and put up a new one describing the current phase.

Herself went into town to meet a friend. The boys’ year end reports came. They were relatively pleased. Herself was furious that there was no sign of hers and that the school uniform is to undergo changes of which she disapproves.

The man came to install the new modem. He disabled the current one for a good half hour leaving me to drop out of one meeting and have to dial in via phone to the next one. Then he said the modem was fine which it is not. Our neighbours seem to have excellent broadband and I decided we would go with their supplier. They have both vodafone and eircom so that they have cover as they both inevitably go down about an hour a day each. This seems a bit extravagant to me but I am slightly tempted.

Daniel and Michael made pizza for dinner and it was excellent.

Thursday, 11 June 2020

A batch of online shopping arrived for me and I was pretty pleased. I discovered that I had, accidentally, bought myself the exact same trousers I have already but, look, I know that I like them.

My sister called to say that my father was getting out of hospital on Friday and I mentally prepped myself for my first trip to Cork since March.

We went out to the cousins’ house to pick up a guitar which we had bought online and had to be collected from within 5kms of them but beyond 5km of us, if you see what I mean. We could just have waited and picked it up ourselves rather than letting it sit in their house for a couple of weeks but it seemed like a good idea at the time.

We had intended to have a walk by the seaside but it was lashing rain so we went to their house. And then we stayed for take away. And now I think that having not seen anyone for months, I have put myself at risk of infection just as I’m about to go and see my father – my nephew had spent the day on a sailing course but in a boat on his own so, ok, I guess? But it was so nice to see them and get out of the house. With other people around, I suddenly became conscious of how much we have just seen our own immediate family. Also, Michael was delighted to get his guitar.

Mr. Waffle sent this picture around the family whatsapp group with the message – “This is depressing.” What on earth will we get him for father’s day?

Friday, June 12, 2020

The hospital aren’t going to release my father after all. Maybe tomorrow. I am on tenterhooks.

The man came to repair the bi-fold door. Apparently they are quite sensitive to heat. Great. Repair was free though so there’s that.

Mr. Waffle and I went out to walk in Howth in the rain. Not as unpleasant as you might suppose. The traffic was appalling on the way there so we seem to be more or less back to normal in that regard.

I chose “Contagion” for movie night which was, to be honest, a bit close to home. We were all familiar with R 0 and social distancing, thanks very much. It’s quite impressive how much the film got right but we all know now that 4 months for a vaccine is much, much too short.

Saturday, June 13, 2020

The hospital are not letting my father out until Monday at the earliest. He has a chest infection and is on IV antibiotics. He’s pretty grumpy as well, I can tell you. I rang to talk to him but he said, “Dear, if all the news you have is emm, emm, then perhaps we should hang up.” It’s just hard to come up with news at the moment is all I would say. I can tell that he’s looking forward to my visit.

Mr. Waffle bought me flowers which was pleasing.

Herself went to a friend’s house for lunch and the rest of us went for a walk by the sea in Portrane which Mr. Waffle and I last did on my birthday on March 10. There’s a lot of water under the bridge since then. Beautiful weather and lots of people in swimming in stark contrast to Howth only the previous day.

We had our last zoom quiz of this pandemic season (suspended on the basis that we can now meet outdoor and indoors in limited numbers) and, finishing on a high note, Mr. Waffle and I won.

Sunday, June 14, 2020 – Father’s Day

Alerted as I was to the presence of Father’s Day by Mr. Waffle’s message to the family whatsapp group, I ordered an online afternoon tea (heavy on seafood) from Cliff House. I was therefore not even slightly delighted when I went downstairs and wished him a happy father’s day and he said, “Is it today? I thought it was next weekend.” People, it is next weekend. But my order came and we had afternoon tea all the same and, in fairness, I have to say it was absolutely delicious though complex assembly required. Highly recommended. I may never eat again. Photo below leaves out lobster bisque (meringues, strawberries, raspberries and cream model’s own).

How did you enjoy father’s day yourself?

Plague Diary – Part VI

19 April, 2020
Posted in: Dublin, Family, Hodge, Ireland, Middle Child, Mr. Waffle, Princess, Siblings, Twins, Youngest Child

Easter Sunday, April 12, 2020

Today was the Princess’s 17th birthday and, it’s fair to say, it’s not quite how she imagined spending the day.

That said, it was a present rich birthday and she got lots of cards and messages on social media from her friends. I loved the birthday cards she got in the post from friends who had clearly never addressed an envelope in their lives. We’re all learning.

As I may have mentioned, we are taking part in an extended family bake off competition. We decided to have the bake off cakes ready for a birthday tea for herself in the afternoon. The day was spent baking. We were exhausted by the time the birthday tea came around. It felt like Christmas day. But, frankly, we did an amazing job.

Herself organised an egg hunt for the boys. It was eggcellent. Ah, go on. Their aunt had posted Easter eggs from Cork which showed real forethought.

We had a very mild walk. The Princess brought with her the disposable camera she had requested for her birthday. She’s keen to take pictures that Apple won’t see first.

A birthday post on herself is in gestation. Hold on to your hats.

Monday, April 13, 2020

We were exhausted after the previous day’s baking and didn’t get up to much.

Everyone set about and did his or her bit on the cleaning rota the success of which has been surprising and very pleasing indeed.

We broke our mop and Mr. Waffle attempted to repair it but a good hour of drilling and cursing noises did not ultimately lead to success. Will we be able to get a new mop in lock down? These are the kind of pressing questions we considered today.

The other family members are a bit worried we may have slightly over achieved on the family bake off. Was the promotional video too much? Herself said anxiously, “Are we the baddies?” I feel not, just keen, very keen.

I finally achieved nirvana by being double booked for zoom calls (bookclub and family bake off both at 8.30) which my brother managed to do far earlier in the pandemic process. Yes, I am competitive in all sorts of weird and unusual ways. Your point?

Herself told me about her friend whose parents are divorced. The friend’s father is a doctor and her mother is abroad. So he is at work all the time and the friend is at home alone and even when he gets home they are social distancing. All her social media posts are asking people to stay home so that she can get her family back. How miserable is that? It did make me count our blessings all over again.

Michael and I went for a lovely cycle in the park. Even he didn’t hate it which is as good as I’m going to get.

Judging took place in the family bake-off. It was tense but, ultimately, the judges (one per household) decided that everyone was a winner. Admire our promotional video prepared by herself.

Tuesday, April 14, 2020

At 8 in the morning, herself and myself cycled off to the bakery and picked up our online order. It was within our 2km radius but still a bit of a trot, so I felt filled with virtue (and also croissant) when I sat down to my desk at 9.

Work was busy but better. It turns out that I am a creature of habit. This comes as a genuine surprise to me and certainly, were they aware of it, would also to people who have interviewed me over the years (“I thrive on change and a dynamic environment*”). I’ve found that as I’ve got used to the new reality and working from home, I’m getting a bit better at creating routines and managing. Here is my working day:

9 At the desk checking what fresh horrors are in my email.
10 Almost always some class of ghastly conference call
11 Little break, cup of tea, dragging the boys from their beds, exciting domestic task like unloading the dishwasher
11.30 Slave some more in the salt mines
1 Lunch (if prepared by Mr. Waffle, 1.30, if prepared by me)
1.45 Walk alone around the block (v. exciting)
2.15 Almost, invariably, another conference call. Hideous.
3.15 Further unbroken saltmining.
5 Determination by me that today, yes today, I will finish early and play tennis with Daniel, cycle with herself, force Michael out of the door etc.
5.01 Exceptionally urgent email arrives forcing me to postpone my plans.
6.30 Finish work for the day. Realise that exceptionally urgent matter could really have waited for the morning.

Actually, today, I had a grand old chat with a female colleague. She is the only other practising catholic I know at work (I mean there are obviously lots of others but short of asking it’s hard to find out) and we confided to each other that we both missed Holy Week celebrations. I never thought that the day would come.

The rat catcher came this afternoon to break up the day. We have given up faith in Rentokil who never came back after their initial visit and the man from around the corner with the Jack Russell is now our operative of choice. He put rat poison outside as he said that we didn’t want rats dying in the house. Frankly, I don’t see what’s to preclude them coming in post-poisoning, if they have a means of entry which I really hope they don’t. The good news, said the rat catcher is that we don’t have tongue in groove flooring so it will be easier to take up, if necessary. It’s hard to see this as really good news. Everyone in the household was reminded of this National Geographic article which herself told us about a number of years ago and which is…memorable. Pray for me.

Hilarious email from SuperValu offering us a priority delivery slot on Wednesday week. We have a scheduled delivery for Thursday week which we ordered three long weeks ago (only date available at the time). Email is like something from a secret society:

Unfortunately, we canâ€™t guarantee youâ€™ll get a slot as theyâ€™re available on a first come, first served basis, but this gives you the best chance of securing a slot. That means itâ€™s crucial that you do not share this information with anyone else.

The power has clearly gone to their heads.

Meanwhile the boys went up to the local public tennis courts for a knock around but they were locked. Alas.

*I promise I have never actually uttered those ghastly words but that was often the gist of my responses.

Wednesday, April 15, 2020

I failed to get up before work for any kind of exercise and I regret this. The working day unfolded in its normal way.

Small walk at lunchtime. Not much to report.

Our sourdough starter arrived and this inspired the Princess to, yet again, beg us to watch the life changing documentary on fermentation she watched a number of years ago. As the proud owner of a sourdough starter, I felt it was time. The documentary “Cooked” was on Netflix. “It’s only an hour,” said she. It started. “Oh yes,” she said, “it starts with fire.” We watched a lot about fire. It wasn’t uninteresting but we had been promised fermentation. “When does the fermentation start?” I asked. “I feel like we’ve watched an hour already and it’s only been fire.” It turns out we had watched an hour and it’s a four part series. Fermentation tomorrow then. The excitement.

Herself had an article published in an online magazine. I am not allowed to read or see it.

In case you care, you can buy a mop in Tesco. Mr. Waffle is refusing to throw out the old mop. I’m a bit unclear about what his plans for it are.

Thursday, April 16, 2020

The Princess and I went for a cycle in the park before breakfast. It was delightful but hard to get up.

Work is becoming more normal and manageable, partly thanks to my exciting daily schedule. Sadly, though, due to an extra conference call, no walk at lunch time. Alas.

We are all living for the excitement that is our fermenting sourdough starter. We’ve already given some away to the neighbours (it keeps growing).

The boys set up and ran an online dungeons and dragons type thing with their friends. They’re learning lots of new skills.

We watched the fermentation documentary. Who knew chocolate was fermented?

Friday, April 17, 2020

I was on a half day and finished work at 3. It wasn’t bad but it wasn’t a classic half day which, ideally, starts at lunch time.

Herself is delving into the deeper, obscure depths of cooking. We had an egg yolk sitting in the fridge surrounded by salt and sugar for the week. Today it was hung up to be air-dried for three days. Then you can grate it over pasta and other foods and it will give a lovely umami flavour. Allegedly.

It’s very odd and currently hard as a bar of soap. I’ll let you know about the umami.

Herself has also taken to lurking on sourdough forums on the internet. Our starter seems happy and maybe this weekend we will make bread with it. All to play for.

We got a sushi making kit and she is currently exploring the joy of vegetarian sushi.

Daniel and I went for a bike ride in the park which, despite his protests, I think he quite enjoyed. Both he and Michael are becoming ludicrously large for their bikes and I see an expensive time ahead as we will have to buy them both proper adult bikes post-pandemic.

Saturday, 18 April, 2020

We got a ridiculously expensive breakfast box delivered. I feel we need to keep our spirits up by having little treats for ourselves. It was plugged in last weekend’s Irish Times. Herself and myself were looking forward to it all week. It was not great. The pastry was stale, the juice was watery and the baguette was fine but you know, only ok. Still, we quite enjoyed looking forward to it all week so we might try for another treat next weekend. I will keep you posted.

In other online purchases, we bought our sourdough starter from these guys: kefirgrains.ie. It is the business and we are delighted with our investment.

I subscribe to an online publication called the Browser. It’s an internet highlights thing and I like it. I have two three month subscriptions to give away, if you’re interested, send me your email and I will sign you up.

I got sent a chain mail thing on the internet. Normally I never send these on but it was sent to me by someone I’m quite fond of and I quite liked the idea of getting poems to my inbox. I sent it on to 20(!) people with some qualms and a cover note advising recipients to ignore, if they could not face it. I felt a bit bad. Herself opined that I was overthinking it. Perhaps. However, did it soothe my guilty conscience to see this article by an Irish Times journalist indicating that she had got the exact same chain email and did it make her feel good, gentle reader? It did not.

It is apple blossom season.

Herself has cut her own hair.

I am in the process of sending mortuary cards to people who sympathised when my mother died and came to the funeral and removal. Given that she died last June, this is not before time. It’s a more difficult exercise than you might imagine as you need to dig out addresses and think what to say and so on. I remember a couple of years ago, after my uncle died, my aunt was quite sick in hospital. I went to visit her and all she could talk about was how the mortuary cards for my uncle hadn’t been sent out. I told her not to be daft that nobody would mind, if they were never sent. I don’t think it was much comfort and now I know how she felt: this task has been positively looming over me for months.

Mr. Waffle, the boys and I went for a cycle in the park. We’re all a bit bored of cycling in the park at this stage. But, good for us, I daresay.

We had a quiz over zoom for people living on the road. It was technologically successful with 9 households taking part. Daniel stayed to help his parents but the other two weren’t interested. Their loss, as we defeated the opposition to become the first reigning champions. First prize is organising next Saturday night’s quiz. Oh well. We’ll be offering sourdough starter as a prize.

I was talking to my sister and I said that the first thing I am going to do when quarantine is lifted is go down to Cork. “I don’t know when I’ve been away for so long,” I said. “But you were here last month,” she said. I was really surprised, but so it is. Time is stretchy in quarantine.

Finally, we’ve decided on our treat – we are getting a projector and screen. We hope to be in a position to inaugurate next weekend, deliveries permitting. Fingers crossed.

How’s quarantine with you?

Plague Diary – Part IV

5 April, 2020
Posted in: Family, Middle Child, Mr. Waffle, Princess, Siblings, Twins, Work, Youngest Child

Monday, March 30, 2020

We are definitively all working from home, you need a letter to come in and only three people in our division are deemed indispensable and happily I am not one of them.

My sister managed to spring my father from hospital. I was so relieved and delighted. He’s not very well but at least he is out of Corona virus central. Quarantining is complex. My brother, who lives with my parents, is in one part of the house and he is in self-isolation after his return from France. My sister is moving home to look after my father and go into isolation with him for a fortnight after his exposure to the virus (March 19). They will be in another part of the house and disinfectant wipes will be a big part of everyone’s lives.

After work, on Monday evening we went and played basketball on a local court en famille but Daniel is so much better than the rest of us that it is only fair if we play 4 against 1 and even then, he’s more likely to win.

I had my Monday night book club online. Another win for the bookclub. Nobody talked about the book and only one person had read it. Nevertheless we are moving from a monthly to weekly bookclub for the duration. We did this via Microsoft video conferencing which I declare to be less satisfactory than zoom.

I tried to set up a zoom conversation with my brother and sister for later in the evening but my brother refused to take part as he was meeting up for virtual drinks with his friends. Where will it end?

The hook which holds the elastic on the Princess’s teeth snapped off and the wretched orthodontist did not reply to emails or calls. My own dentist replied with admirable promptness and texted me immediately to say that his view was that she should take off all elastics and her treatment would be extended for however long the crisis took although he caveated he was not an orthodontist. He is sensible though. She is gutted and also has put blue tack on the sticking out hook to reduce the pain. Miserable? Miserable.

Herself said to me that Whatsapp is a very panicky medium and never was a truer word spoken. My phone is filling up with worthy middle class, middle aged suggestions for myself and my children to achieve online during the crisis and it is mildly stressing me out. Meanwhile Daniel’s GAA team have been given a series of exercises to do every day and his team mates are posting themselves doing the exercises to the Whatsapp group. This is stressing out poor Daniel.

Mr. Waffle finished Daniel Defoe’s “A Journal of the Plague Year” and said it’s not great. Reading the hard books so we don’t have to. Despite considerable pressing by me, no one is willing to read “The Siege of Paris” even though I read out some of the best bits over breakfast. Possibly becuase I read some of the best bits out over breakfast. Not feeling much up to new books so picked up “The Grand Sophy” by Georgette Heyer for a reread and was pleased to see that my mother had written her name and March 1965 on the flyleaf and I thought fond thoughts of her picking it up for the first time 55 years ago.

Tuesday, 31 March 2020

Mr. Waffle found what he thought was another dead rat in the utility room. On closer examination he felt it was some cooked food the cat might have scavenged from a bin. In any event he disposed of the…item and cleaned the floor with bleach. Did I mention that while I am in stately isolation in the study/dining room, Mr. Waffle is working in the utility room or the rat hole as we now know it. In my defence, I am videoconferencing all the time.

When you have 2 adults and 3 teenagers using broadband for class streaming, video conferences and other internet related excitements, you have mediocre connectivity at best, it turns out. We’re all learning. The Princess’s English teacher failed to show up for class leaving them all sitting there like digital lemons.

We made more bread.

Herself made chocolate cake from the neighbours’ hens’ eggs. We gave one cake to the neighbours. We’re not savages. Yet.

For an outside exercise break, I made Michael clip the hedge. I am justifiably proud of my efforts.

Mr. Waffle reorganised the contents of the random chargers box.

Mr. Waffle and I went for a walk and admired the deserted streets of the city. Not that deserted, actually.

I can see a lot more of this kind of fascinating content being available.

Wednesday, 1 April, 2020

God, work was absolutely frantic. Michael missed a zoom class for school. The Princess’s teeth continued sore and no sign of the wretched orthodontist calling. My bread failed to rise. I had a little cry as it felt like I was failing at work and at home. It was a low point. I was somewhat cheered by this video.

Thanks to the neighbourhood whatsapp group, I now know the names of everyone on our street and the DVDs and books they have available to share. GDPR, how are you?

At the end of the day, Mr. Waffle, herself and myself were going to go for a walk but I skipped it to deal with the latest work crisis. Possibly a mistake.

My sister’s company might put her on a three day week. She’s reasonably philosophical.

We’re all a bit worried about my mother-in-law in her nursing home. My brother is finally out of quarantine after his trip to France.

Rentokil did not turn up. The neighbours explained that they had come last week to lay poison and now they are coming back for the corpses/to check if it worked and it seems this is less urgent. But yet.

Thursday, 2 April, 2020

On the whole, a much better day. I started putting my work mobile on silent over lunch and it improved my life by 100%. At lunch time I walked to the bottom of the road, alone in the rain and it felt like quite the break. Dear God. The days all feel a bit the same. I never thought I would miss going in to the office, but I do a bit.

My sister skyped with my father and me. A much more successful operation than I had imagined possible. He looks a bit beaten down by his hospital experience but it was really nice to see him.

The Princess, Mr. Waffle, Michael and I went for a walk while Daniel slaved over his books – he seems to be getting a lot of homework. Michael went back after 10 minutes having been forced out so, at least Daniel had company.

We found another dead rat in the garden. The rat plague is like a Greek chorus to my pandemic woes. You’d be surprised how many people have had rat problems, may I say?

In other good news we got a partial refund for the money we’d paid for the Princess’s school tour to Barcelona having already gloomily written it off.

Herself is testing out new make-up options.

We’ve started watching an Australian series called Rake with the children. It’s deeply inappropriate but it’s the only thing we all like so we’re going to stick with it. Judge away.

My father finished his quarantine, he officially does not have the virus and my sister got to sleep in her own bed so a win all round.

Friday, 3 April, 2020

Work continued busy but I was on a half day and got to take it which was terrific. Herself made pancakes at 4 and we all sat down and ate them. My sister’s company is not moving to a three day week after all, apparently. She’s taking the chopping and changing very calmly.

Mr. Waffle, Daniel and I went to play table tennis and then I went off for a cycle on my own which was calming.

Saturday, 4 April, 2020

We skyped my mother-in-law in the nursing home. Not a great experience for her I feel but we sang from our repertoire of songs and she seemed somewhat appreciative.

There was more hedge cutting. The garden is going to be amazing when this is over.

Online preparations continued for what herself is referring to gloomily as her “quaranteenth birthday”. She’ll be 17 on Easter Sunday.

She and I went for a long cycle in the park together and really enjoyed ourselves which was a surprise to both of us.

We played online games via zoom. Some unhappiness but basically a success, possibly to be repeated.

More eggs from the neighbours. I see further cake making in our future.

Sunday, 5 April, 2020

It’s so odd not to be going to mass on Palm Sunday and the prospect of all the Easter preparations without setting foot inside a church.

At the initiative of my sister-in-law in London, we’re having a family bake off competition to conclude on Monday, April 13. There had better be prizes for everyone is all I can say. Also, special prize for anyone who successfully uses coconut flour.

Online Sunday book club again. Satisfactory. Also a quick walk with Mr. Waffle. No exercise for the boys. Alas. On the plus side, we all did our jobs on the cleaning rota and the house is spotless.

Herself maintains she hears rats under the floorboards in her room. Surely not?

I’m afraid all this content is dull. But things are dull and a bit stressful, I fear. How is your own quarantine going?

Plague Diary – Part II

26 March, 2020
Posted in: Cork, Dublin, Family, Ireland, Mr. Waffle, Siblings

Sunday, March 22, 2020

Mr. Waffle pointed out that yesterday was the Spring equinox and from now on days are longer than nights. Just as well.

It’s my first mother’s day without my mother. Here we are looking arty in 1969.

My sister visited the grave today and planted some flowers but she fears that the dandelion is king. Alas.

Still no Sunday mass. It’s so strange. Daniel and I went to play tennis instead but all the courts were occupied with two sets of people waiting to go on. There were four young people playing football on one court but I lacked the moral courage to do anything about it so we just gave up and went home.

Mr. Waffle and I swept the patio and cut back the foliage; something that made me ludicrously happy. Welcome to the land of middle aged thrills.

We went for a walk in town dutifully socially distancing. Temple Bar was the emptiest I’ve ever seen it.

On our return home, my loving family made me afternoon tea and gave me flowers. Very satisfactory. Herself made brandy snaps. I love a brandy snap.

Mr. Waffle is reading Daniel Defoe’s “A Journal of the Plague Year” and I am contemplating re-reading my book about the fall of Paris which I remember as being impressive on life under siege in 1870. I feel sure I will find some bons mots with which to enthrall you all. So far, all that has happened to plague diary man is that he can’t decide whether to leave London or not.

My father continues to improve in hospital and if he doesn’t catch this wretched virus, he should be discharged home safely shortly.

In other news, my hands feel like scaly lizard mitts from constant washing.

Monday, March 23, 2020

I went into work. Town was absolutely deserted. The office was pretty empty also. We’re on a rota.

Behold a city centre street at 8.15 on a Monday morning:

Brown Thomas (department store) was encouraging us to pull together in Irish.

My father was tested for Coronavirus and came back negative. The hospital said that he could be released home. My sister did Trojan work with the discharge co-ordinator. My brother was already in self-isolation in my parents’ house after coming back from France the previous Tuesday. Even though he had tested negative, the hospital said that my father would still have to go into isolation. My sister said she would move home and mind my father and she and my father and brother could divide the house between them into separate self-isolation zones. My sister pointed out that neither she nor my brother would be able to go and give my 90 year old aunt her pills and her carer has, ominously, a cold. So, unless, they could find someone else to cover, I would need to come to Cork, stay in my sister’s house, not see my father or my brother and sister and check on my aunt every day. I stood ready, given how much my poor sister is doing but I was relieved when they found someone locally.

Britain went into lockdown and my three year old niece in London who has always been pretty dubious about outside as a concept was the happiest child in England. Her parents are sending us regular footage of her ongoing delight at being indoors with both parents all the time which are very entertaining.

Tuesday, March 24, 2020

I worked from home in the morning. The technology continues to work really well although I am already tiring of the video conferencing. Mid-morning, herself and myself walked up to a local shop to buy nice bread (no joy) and the owner said that he was closing the following day for an indefinite period. I hope he comes back.

I was in work for the afternoon. There was much running around and reading the runes after the Taoiseach’s speech further shutting down the country. Was everyone’s presence in the office essential? Could we all be set up to work from home? Apparently we could. Then possibly we could but some presence was essential (as someone said, “my indecision is final”).

Meanwhile, my sister managed to get a radio and headphones into the hospital for my father. He had been having a miserable time as the light was too poor for him to read and he was too deaf to listen to the radio without blasting everyone in a 2 mile radius. Our woman on the inside (my aunt’s cleaner who also works as a hospital cleaner a couple of days a week) went and set him up and put on his headphones. He was delighted but now there is no chance of him ever picking up the phone when I call.

I noticed that I was beginning to lose track of the days of the week without the anchor of regular schedules.

The libraries which have been stellar in the crisis (audiobooks, ebooks, you name it) reassured punters that it didn’t matter when they brought back their outstanding loans. In some ways, not as reassuring as they may have intended.

I used up the last of my dinner candles. And (unrelated) still no flour available in the shops.

Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Herself began to paint her ceiling.

I did not think that the city centre could be emptier than the day before but I was wrong.

It was finally decided that we did not need a full-time presence in the office as everyone was tooled up to to work from home and the technology worked like a charm.

It was my father’s 95th birthday and, notwithstanding headphones, I managed to get hold of him and wish him a happy birthday. He was cheery at the prospect of discharge on the following day.

Herself completed her ceiling painting. I understand that further decoration is to follow, if the paint ever dries. She is currently marinating in paint fumes.

We got a communication from the school that they were engaging with the insurance company to get back the money paid for the school trip to Barcelona. I know this is very #mymiddleclasshell but here are the things we have booked and paid for this year which it appears after some engagement with insurers will not be refunded:

Ski trip last week (very bitter);
Daniel’s trip to Paris at Easter to stay with friends;
The Princess’s aforementioned trip to Barcelona at Easter (if Mr. Waffle can get no money from the insurers, I have no confidence that the school will be successful);
A weekend in Northern Ireland in April for myself and Mr. Waffle (actually, I think they might let us change to later in the year);
A fortnight in Germany for herself in the summer;
Family holiday to NY and LA in the summer (is there some chance this might go ahead? I am not loving our chances at the moment).

Still, as a young colleague pointed out to me, everyone has something. Another colleague told me dolefully of how he and friends had flown to Vietnam only be turned around and sent straight back to Ireland on the next flight.

A professional singer who sang in the adult choir at our church has died. He was in his early 70s, I’d say and very sprightly although a bit superior. Funerals are now small family affairs so we didn’t attend and I don’t know anyone who did. In the current circumstances rip.ie (a resource without which etc.) now has a load of comments under condolences and I see that the poor man seems to have died from Coronavirus. Grim.

I made the whole family watch “Daybreakers”. Only two stars on Netflix but who doesn’t like a high concept film about vampires that’s slightly schlocky (Mr. Waffle apparently).

Not having watched the news in years, I am now avidly consuming the nine o’clock news every night. Everyone hates it but me.

All of the neighbourhood whatsapp groups set up to help us through the Coronavirus are going crazy. So far no one has taken up the many offers of shopping for elderly neighbours and people are offering each other DVDs and books to swap. I suppose we all feel like a bit of community engagement.

Thursday, March 26, 2020

I worked from home. I dragged the boys out of bed about 11. They were stoic. Michael as his daily exercise cut the hedge and swept the path. I was quite pleased. Inspired by his effort, this evening I pursued my long held dream of moving the compost bin. Quite difficult but mission accomplished.

We got bad news from my sister. My father had a temperature and they wouldn’t let him out of hospital. Public health said no and public health are basically running the country now. My sister spoke to my father who is not a particularly emotional person and she said that he said his heart was broken. I feel so sad for him but fingers crossed it’s nothing serious and they will release him next week. I think we’re all a bit terrified he’s going to die alone in hospital having cannily managed his health for so long but maybe we are all unduly pessimistic. I certainly hope so.

At 8 this evening everyone in the country was encouraged to stand outside and clap for the health service. I am very grateful to the health service but I thought it was a fairly stupid idea. I forgot all about it but at 8 I was sitting inside and I heard this thunderous clapping, I went to the front door and there were all the neighbours up and down the street standing at their front doors clapping away and I joined in, somewhat sheepishly. It was surprisingly moving.

Tell me your own plague updates.

The Personal is Political

12 March, 2020
Posted in: Siblings

My sister’s colleagues were wondering whether the parking in Middleton train station was free. One of them undertook to investigate and report back. He did so. Where was his first port of call when trying to work out this knotty question? He rang his local TD’s office. There’s a lesson there somewhere.