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Siblings

More Dispatches from the Cultural Differences Frontier


Posted in: Ireland, Siblings

My sister’s friend who married the Swede was back in Cork for Christmas.

She decided to take her husband’s name. She is wrestling with Swedish bureaucracy and they have referred her request to head office.

While she was in Cork, she decided to check with at the local Garda station to see what the procedure was in Ireland. Dialogue as follows:

Her: So I want to make my name double-barrelled and add my husband’s name.
Guard (puzzled): OK.
Her: So what do I need to do?
Guard (long pause): Start using it, like.

This reminds me of when I left Belgium and went to hand my id card back to the commune.

Man in commune: Where are you moving to? I will post your documents.
Me: There’s no need, I’m moving to Ireland.
Him: But tell me your commune and I will post it for you.
Me: We don’t have communes.
Him: But where do you get your id card?
Me: We don’t have id cards.
Him: But how do the authorities know where you live?
Me: They don’t.

Collapse of stout party etc.

Cork


Posted in: Cork, Family, Ireland, Siblings

We spent a couple of days in Cork. The weather was surprisingly good but much of our time was spent indoors exploring the delights of various electronic devices.

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We did get out for our traditional trip to the observatory and went for a short walk nearby. The view looks idyllic but in fact the Cork ring road is only a stone’s throw away and the noise is quite extraordinary.

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We also saw a large rat which was very exciting and quite daring for the rat given the number of dogs being walked nearby.

My family are always very generous with Christmas presents and the children always look forward keenly to their Cork haul. This year it included, very successfully and at minimal cost compared to the overall investment, a packet of Pringles each. Here you see my brother handing over €20 each to his nephews, jaded from the effort of ripping off paper from so many parcels.

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This is what the pile of presents looked like before they began their work:

I think that a little commentary is needed on the tree. This is the tree which my parents bought the first Christmas they were married. I doubt whether it was particularly attractive in 1967 but now as it approaches 50, it has lost almost all of its sparkle. The spirited campaign which I waged as a teenager to have it replaced by a real tree was utterly unavailing. Now my mother says, “We were green before anyone else.” I am still struggling to make my peace with it.

My sister bought the boys the Skyrim guidebook. She says it is the largest non-academic title she has ever purchased. Indeed, when I saw it first, I thought for a moment that it was a telephone directory. They love it. Even though they do not own Skyrim the game and we will not be purchasing it in the near future as it is certified 18s.

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We also went for our obligatory walk up to the Lough and I recollected how my great Uncle Dan used to skate on the Lough (skates still in my parents’ attic) and the children were filled with hope that it might be frozen but it wasn’t. It was quite mild actually allowing punters to sail their motorised vessels, “like in the Tuilleries” as I said to the children.

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We also went on the big wheel which would have been fantastic if only the boys hadn’t kept twirling it around and making me feel sick as a dog. Note the Princess’s cowl which she knitted herself.

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Returned to Dublin laden with presents and stuffed to the gills.

Happy New Year


Posted in: Family, Princess, Siblings

My mother always says that the people you end up being friends with are the parents of your children’s friends. So this year we spent New Year’s Eve at the house of people whose daughters are friends of our children from school.

The mother is from South Africa which led to the following mortifying exchange.
Her: Last year, Sam and Phoebe played Chase until 1 in the morning.
Me [suspecting some new video game]: What the hell is Chase?
Everyone else: Chess.

Accent difficulties notwithstanding we had a lovely time. We had lots in common with the other guests as our children mostly attend the same school. Other advantages included being able to actually bring the children who had a great time until Michael became too tired to take any more and his siblings wanted to stay. As we had only driven up from Cork that morning and it was about 11 we just went home. The children fell into their beds. I went in to say good night and happy new year to each of them. The last words my daughter said to me in 2014 were, “There is NO WAY I am going on a walk tomorrow. Close the door after you.” How well she knows me. The weather conspired in her favour as it has been lashing all day and we haven’t left the house.

Also I have new year’s resolutions. Firstly, we intend to entertain more. I have decided that we will have people to dinner the third Saturday of every month. Let’s see how that goes. That was about it until the other day. My mother and I had the following exchange:

Her: Your brother Daniel is a good dresser, isn’t he?
Me: He is, particularly for an Irish person where the competition is so limited.
Her: And your sister has really smartened up and dresses quite nicely now.
Me: Yes.
Her: It’s a pity you don’t dress yourself up a bit more. There was a time there when you lived in Brussels that you were quite smart but it seems to have gone downhill.

Frank confession, my entire wardrobe including work and casual clothes includes: 1 suit, 5 skirts, 4 long sleeved tops [+1 my sister gave me for Christmas because she felt I was desperate], 1 short sleeved top, 4 pairs of trousers, 2 cardigans, 1 jumper [Christmas present from sister, see above] 2 jackets, 3 dresses, one fleece and two pairs of holey track suit bottoms. Laid out like that it doesn’t look too bad but it really is. This is not a capsule wardrobe with each piece carefully chosen, immaculately cut and working flawlessly with everything else. It’s what hasn’t worn out [and frankly that is arguable for at least two of the tops]. I’m not sure why but I’ve just lost interest in buying clothes. I bought a nice winter coat in September and a pair of cotton trousers in France in the summer but that’s it for clothes purchases in 2014. It’s not like I sublimate my purchasing needs by buying things for the children. My brother and sister are always buying them clothes so that I don’t have to.

So my second new year’s resolution is to try to improve my wardrobe. My parents gave me a large cheque for Christmas and I intend to begin my labours tomorrow by spending it in the sales. More tops are a priority; perhaps some that need to be ironed. I polished my boots today as well. I am going to pin things to wear on pinterest. Or maybe not. I understand small steps are essential.

Tell me, what are your own new year’s resolutions?

Cultural Differences


Posted in: Siblings, Travel

One of my sister’s best friends has married a Swede and moved to Sweden. One evening she found herself explaining the concept of the draught excluder to a group of his friends. They were absolutely baffled by the idea. After a long silence one of them asked, “Why don’t you build proper houses?”

Alas.

Standards


Posted in: Reading etc., Siblings

My sister: Your blog is never updated. Your loyal followers are disappointed.
Me: Well, tomorrow is the first of November, so you know what that means.
Her: NaBloPoMo
Me: Correct, so a post every day in November.
Her: Meh. The standard of those posts can be really variable.

Citizen of the World


Posted in: Siblings

Previous correspondence with my sister.

Me: How’s Spain?
Her: Fine, I imagine but I don’t know as I am in Germany.

In my defence, she has a very heavy travel schedule. She recently returned from India.

Me: How was it?
Her: Oh, fine. Horrible hotel room.
Me: Why?
Her: In India, the way they make a non-smoking room is to take out the ashtrays.

And then the next week, she was in Abbeyfeale. It’s just non-stop.