Michael: What do the Jews believe?
Me: Well much the same as us but no New Testament, just the stuff in the Old Testament.
Him: So, no Jesus.
Me: Yes, broadly.
Him: No Jesus! Their mass must be so much shorter!
Youngest Child
Easter Holidays – Part 2
We drove back from Cork late afternoon on Holy Saturday and arrived back at about 7 with everybody tired, cranky and hungry. It was in this joyous mood that we made our way up to the Easter vigil in the Church at 9 that evening.
The vigil mass is a really beautiful service but spectacularly lengthy. The church was in darkness and we all went outside to light candles from a brazier. As we filed in to the dark, neo-gothic church with only our candles lit, it was really spectacular. Mr. Waffle, clearly feeling the weight of his role as chair of the residents’ committee, hissed to me, “Who’s taking in the brazier? Some of the locals could do real damage with that.” In the other ear, Michael sighed, “Mass isn’t even started yet, is it?” I was forced to confess, it was not. The music was really beautiful but it was hard to enjoy the service until Mr. Waffle peeled off with the two boys about 10. The Princess and I stayed until it ended at 11 but all in all probably not an experience I would repeat for a while.
On Easter Sunday we had my parents-in-law around for lunch and it all passed off relatively well although my father-in-law had left his lights on and there was some fun with jump leads before they could leave.
Easter Monday was a beautiful day and we decided to go into town to look at the various activities associated with commemorating the 99th anniversary of the Easter Rising. Town was heaving and O’Connell Street boasted a number of attractions which would have been all fine and dandy if there hadn’t been huge queues and a constant fear of losing a child.
In the afternoon, we decided to take a drive to somewhere quieter and went to walk up the Hill of Slane. We discovered that there is no walk up to the Hill of Slane. The car park is about 200 metres from the site but it was tranquil and relatively empty after the chaos of the morning.
We went into the town looking for a cup of tea and ended up having dinner in the Conyngham Arms which was lovely. We sat outside in the walled garden in the sunshine feeling very pleased with ourselves. On the wall, the hotel is described as having the best service in Leinster and I’m not surprised. Our waitress was a heroine meeting our endless ketchup demands with extraordinary cheerfulness.
More soon. Maybe.
Palm Sunday
Today is Palm Sunday. A fact I had forgotten until I entered the church this morning and Michael began loudly complaining when he saw the size of the missalette. “It’s three times longer than normal,” he hissed. “That means mass will last three hours.”
While it didn’t last three hours, it certainly was grand and long. The priest read the first gospel (which I think is not compulsory), he read the longer version of the long gospel (you know the one, it’s the miniature passion play) and then, crowning indignity, he gave a sermon which is normally unheard of on Passion Sunday. The elderly lady in the pew in front fainted. A group of older mentally handicapped people who were behind us made noise throughout the mass much of it mournful. One could hardly blame them. At communion, one of them ran up to the altar scattering pensioners in her wake; it was a difficult Sunday for the pensioners.
As our neighbour’s teenage daughter came down from communion, Mr. Waffle asked whether I thought her top was entirely appropriate for mass. She was wearing a pink hoodie and it was only when she passed me that I saw that the legend on the back was: “Hockey is my religion.”
It was that kind of Sunday. How was your own weekend?
Reliable Research from the Back Seat of the Car
Michael: Everyone hates homework.
Herself: What’s the sample size and what’s your source?
Michael: [Pause] Everyone.
Broadband – Our Ongoing Saga
Another depressing message from Mr. Waffle on the broadband:
Another 10 days before we get broadband…
———- Forwarded message ———-
From: <getmore@eircom.ie>
Date: 16 Mar 2015 12:50
Subject: Your eFibre & eVision installation appointment
To: Mr. Waffleeircom
Account Number: XXDear
Thank you for choosing eircom. Your eFibre and eVision installation appointment is 26 March AM.
In the interim, poor Mr. Waffle has taken to lugging his modem home from work which is good for us but only in the evening. Poor Michael, you should have seen his appalled visage when I told him that it would be 10 days before the internet and television were restored. I asked if I could take a picture of his sad face for the blog but he seemed to regard this as an unwelcome and tactless intervention, so you will have to use your imagination.
Busy Weekend
On Friday night we dropped Michael off at the scout hall at 7 for his first sleep over. It was his first time ever sleeping without his brother under the same roof. They both really missed each other. All the time he was gone, Daniel kept asking when he would be back and when Michael eventually came home, they gave each other a big hug.
On Saturday morning, Daniel had a GAA match, herself was on a course and I went to look at new bikes. V. exciting. On Saturday afternoon at 3, Michael returned from scouts. At 3.30 the Princess and I cycled into town and tracked down a jacket for her to wear to her confirmation. At 5.30, I dropped Daniel and Mr. Waffle up to meet a group from Daniel’s GAA club who were going to see Dublin v Tyrone in Croke park (a draw). We collected them at nine and collapsed into bed. On Sunday, we had a starring role at mass. After mass, herself and Daniel stayed for choir rehearsal. When they came home, we had lunch and then cycled to the supermarket (reasonably painless) to pick up treats for a trip to the cinema with the cousins at 4.
Is it any wonder that we were all a bit tired as we sat down for dinner at 7.30? With one thing and another, we also have a very busy week ahead and as, over dinner, I outlined the excitement that was coming, I commented, “And I’ll be playing a couple of tennis matches as well, because I’ve entered the Spring round robin.” Then I sat bolt upright in horror as I realised that I was meant to be playing at that very moment. I telephoned my opponent all apologies and we agreed to meet at 8 instead although I was somewhat unenthused after my roast chicken dinner. I returned defeated 6-0, 6-3 an hour later. And I still haven’t packed for my work trip tomorrow. Sigh.
How was your own weekend?