belgianwaffle

Let off the Leash


Posted in: Dublin, Ireland, Middle Child, Princess, Twins, Youngest Child

May 17 was a beautiful day and I noticed (on the way home from a Communion, of course) that there were quite a few families in the small park near our house. Since, it was “Take your children to the park and leave them there” day, I decided when we got home to send the three children off to the park together alone for the first time. They took an unhealthy picnic and off they went for an hour and a half.

They had a great time. Nobody was run over. Nobody was even sunburnt. They reported back that the boys played soccer with some other children; they all rolled down the hill; and herself lay on the picnic mat and read her book. It was delightfully peaceful at home. Do not mock, if your children spend all day on the green and only come in at tea time. I know that you knew this all along.

Communion Season


Posted in: Dublin, Family, Ireland

We have been to three first communions over the past three weekends.

One Sunday we turned up at mass only to find that it was first communion Sunday. Traditionally, these ceremonies have taken place on a Saturday but a shortage of priests means that they are moving to Sundays. Other regulars were absent but, having missed choir rehearsal during the week, we hadn’t heard. A very long mass involving hoards of relatives filming in the aisle and a particularly lengthy sermon from the parish priest who is no slouch in this department even under normal circumstances.

The priest said to the first communicants that in a way they were now grown-up. Michael snorted in derision, “Maybe if there was a 1 in front of the 8. Then they’d be in college and grown-ups. [Pause] College is school for grown-ups. [Further pause] Work is school for proper grown-ups”

Then the following Saturday, Daniel was singing in the choir for the school first communion. He and I daringly, and relatively successfully cycled into town for the mass.

Last Saturday, the children’s cousin had his first communion. We were almost late but made it. The ceremony was lovely and there was an impressive array of food on offer in the children’s school afterwards. I had to pace myself, however, as the communicant’s parents, rather bravely, in my view, had the extended family (17 people) around for lunch afterwards. All very successful, including a number of live renditions of the hit songs from Frozen.

This weekend, there are no first communions. We don’t know what to do with ourselves.

It’s Not You, It’s Me


Posted in: Ireland

Whenever I see a guard, I worry that I am about to be arrested. I cannot imagine why this should be as I am excruciatingly law abiding. So, I got a shock when I came home one evening and saw Mr. Waffle chatting to a Guard at the front door.

It was our community guard (Mr. Waffle knows all sorts of people from the residents’ committee). I said to the guard how I had performed an examination of conscience when I saw him but felt I was crime free. He said, that there was no need for me to do this, and rather it was the contrary as, in the wake of recent issues, they were going around house to house asking people were they happy with the guards. Who’d be a guard? Also, they are definitely getting younger.

A La Carte


Posted in: Twins, Youngest Child

We have an American priest some Sundays and it is something of a culture shock to the Irish congregation; we’re mostly used to him now.

A couple of weeks ago, instead of mumbling the creed all together as a congregation, he called out the lines and the congregation had to say “absolutely!” in between each declaration [traditionally where this has been done, the congregation has said “I do” but each to his own, I suppose].

So, the Creed began:
Priest: I believe in God the Father, Almighty, Maker of heaven and earth
Congregation: Absolutely.
Michael: NO.
Priest: And in Jesus Christ, his only begotten Son, our Lord.
Congregation: Absolutely.
Michael: Nope.
Me: Furious hissing.
Michael: Well I don’t.
And so Michael went on to the amusement of the congregation until –
Priest:I believe in the .. forgiveness of sins.
Michael (loudly): Absolutely.

Report from the Front Line – Religious Instruction


Posted in: Dublin, Ireland

Teacher: So, then, after the resurrection…
Child 1: Wait, Jesus came back from the dead?
Teacher: Yes.
Child 2: But nobody can come back from the dead, Miss, when you’re dead, you’re dead.
Teacher: Nevertheless…
Child 3: Seriously, Miss, who believes that?
Teacher: You do, and you’d better get going before your confirmation on Thursday.

Parenting Fail


Posted in: Middle Child, Twins

Me: What happens if you leave [small, plastic, breakable] Skylanders on the floor?
Daniel [not being sarcastic, just genuinely trying to guess the right answer]: You’ll pick them up?