We sat into the car the other day and the Princess said to me, ““I’Â’m sorry, hon, but I just did a wee in my car seat”.”
Comments
UndercoverCookie on 07 March 2006 at 11:58
oh that is sweet and er, yuck all at the same time.
poggle
on 07 March 2006 at 12:15
She is absolutely priceless. Hon.
(Homepage)
on 07 March 2006 at 13:42
Where did you FIND her?
a href=”http://www.20six.co.uk/pog”>poggle
on 07 March 2006 at 13:58
Now there’s a question ….
on 07 March 2006 at 20:11
Ezra has taken to calling me by my first name with exactly the same condascending tone that his dad uses. It’s eery.
loadofoldtosh2
on 08 March 2006 at 09:23
Caption: In training!
belgianwaffle
on 08 March 2006 at 22:53
Loot, are you Jimi? I’m impressed that he can say Minkleberry, particularly in that tone of voice.
Thank you, I think, UC, pog, Kristin.
a href=”http://www.20six.co.uk/loadofoldtosh2″>loadofoldtosh2
on 09 March 2006 at 08:45
(picks a pale Jimi up off the floor) nope am not Jimi; the giveaway being that I was out of the country for a bit whilst Jimi was looking after a heavily pregnant Minks.
The Old Ones Are the Best
A man in a hot air balloon over the Belgian countryside realised he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. Descending a bit more he shouted, “Excuse me, can you help? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago but I don’t know where I am”. The woman replied, “You’re in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above the ground, between 40/41 degrees latitude, north, and 59/60 degrees west, longitude”. You must be a middle-grade Commission Official”, said the balloonist. “I am”, replied the woman, “I’m a Grade A*8. How did you know?”
“Well”, answered the balloonist, “everything you told me is technically correct but I have no idea what to make of your information and the fact is, I am still lost. Frankly, you’ve not been much help at all. If
anything, you have delayed my trip.”
The woman below responded, “You must be a Senior Commission Official”. “I am,” replied the balloonist, “But how did you know?”
“Well,” replied the woman, “you don’t know where you are or where you are going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problem. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it’s my fault”
Doctor’s Visit
Conversation with the doctor:
Him: They’ll need two booster shots on the meningitis….
Daniel: Scream, scream, scream.
Michael: Scream, scream, scream.
Princess (at top of voice): Stop screaming Daniel and Michael.
Me: Sorry, I didn’t catch that.
Him: Has the Princess had a meningitis shot?
Me: No [I’d remember, it’s 68 euros per shot – they’ll each need 3 shots; the doctor charges 40 euros per child per visit so that makes it approx 660 euros for the twins; I think I’d have remembered even half
that expenditure for her Highness].
Him: No, it has been developed since she was a baby.
Me: Actually my brother works for the pharmaceutical company that developed it; I like to think that I am contibuting my mite to his bonus.
Daniel: Scream, scream, scream.
Michael: Scream, scream, scream.
Princess: TALK TO ME!
Him: I’m afraid that I didn’t quite catch that.
Further entertainment was provided by a broken lift which meant that I had to carry Michael and Daniel up and down the stairs while getting herself to join us by powers of persuasion rather than brute force. Needless to say we only discovered the lift was broken by squeezing into it and waiting in vain for it to move. Did I mention that I forgot to bring the boys’ nappy bag? Oh happy morning. Oh yeah and that it snowed on us on the way back to the car.
When we arrived home, it was to discover that the boys had fallen asleep in the car. The Princess instantly remedied this by screaming in their ears. Fab.
on 06 March 2006 at 16:27
How you keep your hands off of them I don’t know. I shall be a very bad mother.
on 06 March 2006 at 22:27
Kristin, how comforting.
Bobble, and who says I keep my hands off them? In fact, these days, I seem to spend half my time physically wrenching herself off her brothers.
Introducing my Brother to Feminism
Him: I can’Â’t visit you before you go back to work in April; I have various social commitments and then IÂ’’m going to Switzerland for a couple of weeks to ski and visit friends.
Me: Well then, IÂ’ll maybe see you in May, although we may weÂ’ll be in Sicily at the end of the month for the new cousin’Â’s christening.
Him: Humph, no dimunition in the lifestyle then.
Me: Speechless indignation.
Him: Are you sad that your holiday will be over soon?
Me: Further speechless indignation.
Him: Will it be a bit complicated with the children when you go back to work?
Me: Yes [launch into explanation of elaborate childcare arrangements]
Him: ArenÂ’’t you annoyed with me?
Me(cautiously): Um, yes, generally, why in particular?
Him: Because I’m assuming that you will be taking care of all the childcare and youÂ’’re the woman.
Me: But youÂ’’re on the phone to me.
Him: But still, all those years of banging on about the glass ceiling. Something’Â’s rubbed off.
Me: You mean that you feel you have more effective tools to annoy me?
Him: Well, yes. What is the glass ceiling anyway?
on 06 March 2006 at 13:27
belgianwaffle
on 06 March 2006 at 22:31
Lenten Fast
I have given up biscuits for Lent. Last night I asked Mr. Waffle whether he would like a square of chocolate with his tea. ““Eh?” ““I bought chocolate because I can’Â’t have biscuits. I’Â’m off biscuits for Lent”,” I explained patiently. “”I think that youÂ’’re missing the point somewhat”.”
God these lapsed Catholics are such nitpickers.
By the way, we’re not in the Hague. The Princess is still not better and she was so miserable and cranky that we decided that we had better stay put rather than packing her up and taking her to another country. Unpacking when you havenÂ’’t even got to where you were packing for is very distressing. As far as I can see, the only upside is that I can now eat the box of Belgian chocolates which we had been planning to give the Dutch Mama. With my post dinner cup of tea, should I so wish.
Buffy
(Homepage)
on 04 March 2006 at 12:57
It’s Lent already!!
kristin
(Homepage)
on 04 March 2006 at 18:08
poor princess. kisses to her, and enjoy your lenten chocs. *chortle*
beachhutman
on 04 March 2006 at 23:19
Good reasons to be lapsed, part three.
Friar Tuck
I believe this requires an expert opinion. Ahem. If your Lenten penance makes you irritable and unkind, THAT is missing the point. I know that going off chocolates makes me irritable so I can only imagine what it does to less saintly people. Eat up with a clean conscience. Now, go get that expert opinion I mentioned earlier.
poggle
on 06 March 2006 at 13:26
Has Mr Waffle no compassion at all? Tch.
belgianwaffle
on 06 March 2006 at 22:30
Thank you LM. Yes, Buffy, you may rely on this site for ecclesiastical guidance. Thanks Kristin. BHM, nitpicking? FT, it’s all clear now. Will you start your own blog? If not will you use your IT skills to help me set up my own website? Pog, none, he has a heart of stone.
All the Flowers of Arabia or Something
The Princess has special fruit flavoured toothpaste. Emblazoned in large letters on the tube are the words “’sugar free””. Meanwhile, for her bottom she has special wipes in their own special box (parents, we’Â’ll buy anything). Designed specifically for the needs of toddlers, or so the blurb tells me, they are melon scented. Why do toddlers need to have melon scented bottoms?
Anyway we will be packing our sugar free toothpaste and our melon flavoured wipes and two prams and God knows what else and departing for the Hague at lunch time. The excitement.
poggle
on 03 March 2006 at 16:22
Oy! Does this mean our toothpaste has sugar in it?
Gah.
kristin
(Homepage)
on 03 March 2006 at 19:05
have a lovely time in The Hague. Work on some international treaties while you’re there, OK? And we have the special toddler-bottom wipes as well. I was sitting there with the Wee One the other night while she created her masterpiece, and i pondered why on earth she got special flushable wipes and the rest of us have to make do with Charmin.
Travel safe.
belgianwaffle
on 04 March 2006 at 11:45
Bobble, how do you know this? As a non-parent, that is odd…Pog, terrifying. Kristin, ah thank you for your good wishes but it was not to be. Sigh…