belgianwaffle

Tortured Vowels


Posted in: Princess

When the Princess speaks English, she sounds like a little Belgian. Aside from the mistaken direct translations (e.g. “I’m there” for “I’m here” and “I’m coming” for “I can do it”) her accent is very odd. She pronounces there “theyRE”, here is “heRE” and chair is “chayRE”. I am baffled, it’s not like she’s ever heard anyone say “chayRE” and she obviously has no idea how they’re spelt.

She also laughs at my French pronunciation. Her class is called “accueil” and that combination of vowels is very hard for the non-French speaker. She now ambushes me saying: “Say “écureuil, accueil, feuille”” Mummy. Oh very funny.

Religious Observance


Posted in: Princess

“Can we go to the pain quotidien (post mass treat) and no mass?” the Princess asked me

I don’t know why she objects, it’s far from the dull experience I had when I was her age.   We check out the confessionals at the back of the church and look at all the statues “Look, Mummy, baby Jesus. Oh Mummy, another baby Jesus”. You get the picture.

Incidentally, I am having some difficulty explaining the role of Joseph in the holy family, for the meanwhile he has been described as Jesus’s Daddy which may yet get me excommunicated.

Looking at the pietà which features a rather grisly looking Jesus we had the following exchange.
Her: Oh Mummy, poor sick Jesus.
Me: Yes dear.
Her: And his Mummy Mary is sad.
Me: Yes she is, poor Mary.
Her: As sad as Cinderella?
Me: Possibly even sadder.
Her: We give her a biscuit to make it better.
Me: She is so sad that even a biscuit may not make it better.

Comments

kristin

(Homepage)

on 15 January 2006 at 16:31

Good for the Princess, tackling the tough topics. My little one is terrified of the priests, which makes eucharist very complicated. last time, as the wizened hand reached forward to bless her, she backed up, stepped off the kneeling bit at the altar rail and fell smack on her diapered bottom. Oh, the screams. Mommy didn’t take communion that day, she was busy rushing the screaming devil-child away from the source of righteousness.

NorahSplog

on 15 January 2006 at 19:16

Ahh biscuits. Is there anything they can’t do? 1 Sweetie(s) given

Friar Tuck

on 16 January 2006 at 16:10

If it’s such a pain, why does Princess like it so much?  (Sorry. Now I know why you want me out of your blog.)

poggle

on 16 January 2006 at 17:50

I’m sure the baboon would agree with her on the biscuits fixing anything principle … 0
Sweetie(s) given

belgianwaffle

on 19 January 2006 at 12:06

Pog, Norah, ahh biscuits. Thanks for the sweetie N.
FT, get your own blog.
Kristin, no problem at all, made me feel very popular.
Thks Sez. 

Did you know that Prince Charming was Irish?


Posted in: Princess

Me: And the clock struck midnight.
Her: Bong, bong, bong.
Me: And Cinderella ran away.
Her: Did Prince Charming say “feck” Mummy?

Comments
NorahSplog

on 12 January 2006 at 10:32

Har! Fab. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

sonicson

on 12 January 2006 at 17:15

love it!! 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

poggle

on 12 January 2006 at 17:37

Oh – it reminds me of the days of Lazy Jack Silver and Her Imperial Highness’s haughty tones ….. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

Peggy

(Homepage)

on 12 January 2006 at 21:28

Adorable ;-))
When he was her age, Tetan pretended he was Alice (in Wonderland). That worried me at some point (since I remembered giving birth to a baby boy). Nowadays, he sits on the side of the bathtub pretending he is a gargoyle (The Gargoyles on TV everyday at 8.00am). When I was 4, I didn’t even know what a gargoyle was… A spoiled generation. ���

cha0tic

on 13 January 2006 at 13:03

Please tell me you said yes. Please. I know I would, I couldn’t help myself. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

belgianwaffle

on 13 January 2006 at 14:09

cha0tic, said maybe.
Thank you Peggy, think we’re some way from the sophistication of gargoyles over here.
Ah yes, pog, I know what you mean – when I had time on my hands.
Bobble, Norah, Sonicson, ta. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

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A Fairy Tale Ending


Posted in: Mr. Waffle, Princess

The Princess is obsessed with Cinderella.   We have seen the pantomime, the puppet show, the film and we are in possession of a number of variations of the book.

Last night Mr. Waffle put her to bed and he told me that she did her latest trick inspired by the magic of the fairy godmother.  ““Phtum,”” she said waving an imaginary wand, ““you are Princess and I am Daddy.”

““What did you do?”” I asked. ““What do you think I did?”” he said, ““I lay on her bed while she sat in the chair beside me and told me the story of Cinderella.”

Comments

Diva

on 11 January 2006 at 17:04

Excellent! LOL

Friar Tuck

on 12 January 2006 at 04:18

Come on, admit it. You’re telling us these cute stories about Princess to convince us that we absolutely, positively must have an opportunity to babysit her. You’ve got me convinced.

belgianwaffle

on 12 January 2006 at 09:53

Mike, that’s brought back dreadful memories.
Ta Diva.
FT, you may live to regret this offer.

School and logistics


Posted in: Middle Child, Princess, Twins, Youngest Child


Monday went fine. Tuesday was ok. This morning she was in floods of tears. The problem is that she won’t sleep at school and she’s exhausted. I am collecting her at 12.10 today with a view to
giving her a nice long nap at home. If she does not nap at home,
I will shoot myself. Mr. Waffle is away on a business trip and
not coming back until tomorrow. Blind terror prevails.

Today will also be the first time that I have to collect her with the
boys as on Monday and Tuesday, I had people in to mind them. I am a little concerned that I will not be able to marshall all three of
them home (Princess on foot, Michael in sling and Daniel in buggy) so, despite the fact that the school is only around the corner, I think I might drive to collect her. Farewell, ozone layer. I cannot
tell you how much I am looking forward to trying to get her out the door to school tomorrow (up to now this has been her loving father’s task) with the boys in tow.

Thought I should mention that yesterday I was superwoman. Drove to the creche to drop off a little present and pick up a portrait of the Princess. Went to my place of work and passed the (immensely well behaved) boys to swarms of admirers. Left before they started to cry. Breastfed them both for half an hour in the back of the car while covered by cloth of decency and reading the LRB.

Lunched with Mr. Waffle while saintly Michael slept and I breastfed Daniel. Mercifully, a kind providence had placed us sitting beside two nordic gentlemen so, being Scandinavian and right on, they didn’t bat an eyelid, I’m not even sure that they noticed.

Came home, dropped the boys with G, set out for school, took Princess to the park and for a cup of tea. Came home, relieved G. With the Princess’s assistance, bathed both boys and prepared dinner for Mr. Waffle’s return at 6.45. Promptly collapsed with exhaustion thereafter.

Comments
NorahSplog
on 11 January 2006 at 10:22

Good lord woman – you’ve transcended mere human and appear to have evolved into some sort of super-being. 1
Sweetie(s) given

UndercoverCookie

on 11 January 2006 at 10:23

you were superwoman not just yesterday but are so every day. Just the logistic of two babies and a (demanding) princess sound a nightmare, never mind all the other stuff. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

geepeemum

on 11 January 2006 at 14:49

Just reading that makes me tired. And I’m worried about the ski trip? Actually – yes, I’m still worried about the ski trip. 1
Sweetie(s) given ���

kristin

(Homepage)

on 11 January 2006 at 23:33

could the princess be more precious?! clever girl! ���

Bobble

on 12 January 2006 at 08:40

You should patent the phrase ‘cloth of decency’ my dear. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

belgianwaffle

on 12 January 2006 at 09:56

Bobble, stolen from himself, I fear.
Ta Kristin, GPM, UC and Ms. Splog. Special thanks for the sweeties GPM and Ms. Splog. You are wise to continue to be scared of the week alone GPM..
SSC, yes, I used to love the sandpit myself.


Posted in: Family, Middle Child, Princess, Twins, Youngest Child

The boys were christened. Rejoice. Mr. Waffle got two blankets from Marks and Spencer to serve as spotless garments. By the time we got to the church, one of them had been trailed in the mud. Alas.

The boys were very virtuous and slept and were therefore left in the hall. In fact the poor mites spent a lot of Christmas sleeping in halls.

As promised earlier, please admire photograph of me breastfeeding twins and maintaining a
semblance of decency. Yes, I know you were all desperate to see that.

The Princess eats eggs. My parents-in-law are the proud possessors of one egg cup.  One day it went missing.  My mother-in-law said, “Don’Â’t worry, you know what makes a great egg cup? A toilet roll”.”  She scurried off to the bathroom to get a roll of toilet paper. I said defiantly, ““I am not feeding my daughter an egg from a roll of toilet paper”.” ““But it’Â’s a fresh roll,”” she said.  The
Princess started to wail. I conceded defeat and gave her the egg from the roll of toilet paper.   It works perfectly.  I said to my mother-in-law, ““I’Â’m almost afraid to ask but how do you know this?””  ““Well,” she said “”when I was an air hostess in the 60s and we went to New York overnight, you would get a breakfast allowance. We wanted to save the money, so we would buy eggs and boil them in the hotel kettle and eat them from the roll of toilet paper.  That woman is determined to ruin my vision of the glamour of the glory days of aviation.

Comments

jackdalton

on 09 January 2006 at 11:13

All of life is, in a sense, about one of two blankets trailing in the mud. 😉
Lovely pics: I particularly like the one where Cha is sleeping among the wine bottles…

Friar Tuck

on 09 January 2006 at 16:07

After drinking all that wine, it is no wonder that they were snockered!
Great pics though. Your breastfeeding pic is even decent enough to be shown in America. It was surely a disappointment to the NSA folks, who, I am sure, have set a filter to find all references to ‘breastfeeding’ passing through the air.
Ha ha. Just kidding. I’m sure they are only looking for terrorists. No, really. I love America. I love G.W. Bush. Please don’t arrest me.

Diva

on 09 January 2006 at 16:49

Wow, haven’t they grown! They look smashing :o)

Lilo

on 10 January 2006 at 21:16

So THATs how you breastfeed two – I’ve always wondered – they’re very accommodating little chaps aren’t they?

belgianwaffle

on 11 January 2006 at 10:03

Lilo, yup, they are what is known as “good babies”.
Thanks Diva.
Friar Tuck, where have you gone? Why are you wearing an orange jump suit?
JD, profound.
Ta Norah.

dmts

on 11 January 2006 at 20:15

I love Friar Tuck. Perhaps this is the wrong thing to be saying about a man of the cloth and all that jazz and I may be going straight to hell, but I shall quote him come the day of being judged….

ali

(Homepage)

on 12 January 2006 at 01:54

you definitely are a wonderwoman! i have enough trouble breastfeeding one!!!!

belgianwaffle

on 12 January 2006 at 09:52

HJB, quite. I think he should start his own blog..
Ali, forget breast feeding, am deeply indebted to you for the info that Angelina Jolie is pregnant.

https://www.belgianwaffle.net/2006/01/500/