belgianwaffle

Miscellaneous

The fate of the free world


Posted in: Miscellaneous

The Americans are voting.  The rest of us are holding our breath.

Very excitingly, Beth has an entry all about it as requested by me.  It is true, the Americans are the most polite people in the world.

And finally, got this text message from the best dressed diplomat who is being diplomatic in New York:

“Overheard, kid to mother: Mom, did you hear that a Kerry Edwards hot air balloon landed in Central Park?

Mom: Yes.

Kid: Mom, who’s Kerry Edwards?”

Comments
Friar Tuck

on 03 November 2004 at 05:18

In case a certain presidential candidate-I will not specify which one-is re-elected, would you have a spare room where I could crash for the next four years?

belgianwaffle

on 03 November 2004 at 11:04

Well, FT, it’s not looking like it’s going to be Kerry Edwards, is it?

Car hire outrage


Posted in: Miscellaneous

I was thinking about going to visit my parents in Cork for a week in November.  And I was thinking that I would hire a car to get myself and her highness from Shannon to Cork.  And it is criminally expensive.  Which of the following charges would you describe as unreasonable:

– 40 euro per day extra for baby car seat hire

– 25 euro per day location surcharge (if you pick up the car in an airport or a city location: um where do car hire offices usually live?)

– 50 euro drop off charge if you leave the car off somewhere different from where you picked it up.

And I haven’t even paid for the bloody car yet.  I only wanted it for the day to get me up and down to Shannon.  I fear that if we are to go at all, my poor parents may be pressed into service.  Or, I suppose, oh horror, we could get the bus.

Comments
glowstars

on 17 October 2004 at 00:50

I’d only go for the bus if the journey is relatively short and it comes complete with either toilets or stopping points.
Nope, I’d draught in your parents! lol

Locotes

on 17 October 2004 at 20:41

Well I’m assuming that Cork don’t do Belgian flights? I’m trying to remember how long a drive it is to Shannon – would the bus be that bad? (Don’t get me wrong, I hate buses and avoid long trips like the plague). Maybe you’re more worried about herself and the almost inevitable noisy tantrum that will lead to evil looks from fellow passengers.But yes, that does sound like crazy money, especially for the seat, just bring your own! So if it’s not too stressful for them, I’d do some parent-roping.

belgianwaffle

on 17 October 2004 at 21:30

Jack, it’s a hard airport to get to. I would bore you with the details, but I can’t face it. Glowstars, Loc, I think your advice is good and I may well rope in my unfortunate parents.

Random news from other people


Posted in: Miscellaneous

The best dressed diplomat telephoned me from Brown Thomas in Dublin the other morning, having stopped off briefly on her way to New York. She wanted to report the following comment.

Middle aged sales lady on lingerie floor calling to colleague “Mary, are we out of the black bras with nipple tassels?”

The heart surgeon called to say that she is off to a heart surgeons’ love-in in Washington DC.  Will it be fun?  “Well, I’m looking forward to the interactive bit where we ask questions to a doctor performing surgery.”  “In the auditorium?” “Oh no, by video link up, she/he has a headset”. Yes, and apparently the 1,000 bods in the audience ask questions of the on screen doctor while he/she works. What kind of consent forms do you imagine these patients sign?

And finally, check out this friend of Dervala’s who heard her husband won the nobel prize on Monday morning.

Comments
NorahSplog

on 06 October 2004 at 13:06

I used to have to phone a surgeon in Wales. After a few months I asked one of my colleagues what they supposed the slurping noises were when I spoke to him on the phone…I’m annoyed that the black bras with the nipple tassels have sold out though.

silveretta

on 06 October 2004 at 13:45

I’m petitioning the Nobel committee to introduce a Prize for best nipple-tassled bra. Physics seems so exclusive – it’s got maths and stuff in it hasn’t it? Who understands that.

poggle

on 06 October 2004 at 16:49

Gosh. Dublin’s so racy these days!

belgianwaffle

on 07 October 2004 at 21:57

HJB, of course, that’s where they’ve gone. Norah, distressing. Silver, Nobel blog? Pog, I know, I’m terrified that I will never settle back due to overwhelming lack of raciness.

Bored


Posted in: Miscellaneous, Reading etc.

I know, I’m not allowed to be bored what with all you wage slaves out there struggling away to meet deadlines and me being idle while my baby sleeps. But I am bored. So there.  And it’s raining.  Am so bored that I have completed a number of ghastly tasks that have been looming over me for some time. I may even try to write a second paragraph of my book. You know, the one that lacks plot, characters and dialogue. All I need now is for my mother to come in and tell me that if I’m really that bored I can go and tidy my room.

Comments
belgianwaffleon 24 September 2004 at 15:40

Look, if you’re very lucky and I get a good reference from Heather (ha ha), you may be able to blogsit for me. Surely that’s better than any goody bag. By the by, the publishing exec informs me that MY goody bag is on its way and it is excellent.

NorahSplogon 24 September 2004 at 15:42

I have a solution; have you ever noticed that you’re never bored when you have some horrible task to do? What you must do is decide that you really ought to update your CV / paint the cellar / wash the car / polish the cutlery / read one of those books you bought because you really ought to read it. As soon as you’ve decided that’s what you ought to be doing you’ll suddenly find a plethora of little things to occupy yourself with for “just five minutes more before you get started”. Works for me.

dmtson 24 September 2004 at 15:43

I’ll talk to you later about the reference but first of all I want to have words with you about stealing my idea for the book wiht no plot, characters or dialogue – there’s only room for one of those at the time.
It’s really bad if you’ve vacuumed under things or behind things.

belgianwaffleon 24 September 2004 at 15:49

Norah, I’ve done all that. No really, it’s just ghastly, I’m contemplating going through my old electricity bills and throwing out ones that are more than 6 years old. Heather, I would love to Hoover but am terrified it would wake herself and her views on the hoover are overwhelmingly negative…actually, I suppose if I was really bored I could wake the Princess, you know, Norah, you’re right, there are a couple of bits and pieces I should see to like putting up that picture etc.
By the by Heather, I suspect that there probably is a market for our plotless, characterless, dialogueless books (TM). We are post-post-modern. I think that PPM books are also very short. Maybe a paragraph and a half?

Great constipation stories


Posted in: Miscellaneous

Check out the horrifying, toe-curlingly embarassing story on Dooce. Warning: this features what the author delicately calls “poop”…

Comments
adam_ball

on 18 September 2004 at 11:55

Hey what’s wrong with foreign toilets? Unless you mean those nasty older european ones with a waterless platform for you to deposit your sample on. I’m convinced they are there to stop men spending half an hour in the toliet. Who can sit there with the humm rising around you for longer than is absolutely necessary?

belgianwaffle

on 18 September 2004 at 14:19

What can I say lads, you’ll have to take it up with Dooce.

Friar Tuck

on 19 September 2004 at 00:46

How do you find these stories?! Do you google “poo” everyday? Come to think of it, that’s more exciting than what I do in my spare time.
I cannot relate to the foreign toilet problem either, although I was a little reluctant at first to use the old Italian-style hole in the floor that you squat over. I mean, how are you supposed to know if your aim is right?!

belgianwaffle

on 20 September 2004 at 10:34

No, you don’t need to if Dooce is one of your faves.

Dressing to impress


Posted in: Miscellaneous, Princess

Yesterday, the Princess and I passed a juggler on the street.  I said “look sweetheart, a man with balls”. Hmm.

We went to a party last night. I had nothing to wear. No really. I knew I was in trouble when I hauled out my maternity party wear and my hockey skirt from the bottom of the wardrobe and seriously wondered whether I could wear any of these items.

Comments
silveretta

on 13 September 2004 at 15:21

Is that what passes for sex education in the Waffle household?

belgianwaffle

on 13 September 2004 at 16:09

Hmm. Interesting Jack. Yes, Silver.

RockStar Mommy

(Homepage)

on 14 September 2004 at 06:06

I actually wore one of my maternity shirts once way after I was pregnant because I had nothing else to wear and it looked really cute. You couldn’t even tell it was a maternity shirt though. I got so many compliments. Go figure.
on 14 September 2004 at 11:58

With a comment like that, you would have been perfect as a Dodgeball cast member….

belgianwaffle

on 14 September 2004 at 15:10

RockStar Mommy, I have looked at your photo album and see where you are coming from. I am, alas, only an aspirant rockstar Mommy and none of my maternity wear is likely to inspire compliments. I am reconsidering the hockey skirt though, little pleated skirts are very in, this season. Locotes, what’s dodgeball?

Locotes

on 14 September 2004 at 16:29

Ahem. Dodgeball is a new movie comedy out with Ben Stiller. About the game dodgeball. Full of ‘ball’ related puns. Basic yet amusing. I’m sorry, I was far too modern with that comment – I’ll try and find a renaissance painter quip next time.
😉

jackdalton

on 14 September 2004 at 16:47

Hockey skirt, hockey skirt, hockey shirt….. and a photo of same, legs included, on the Princess Diary please. Before Locotes has to make one…

belgianwaffle

on 15 September 2004 at 21:25

Locotes, thank you. Await reference to Botticelli masterpiece. Jack, hockey skirt is too large for Princess, it trails around her ankles..

jackdalton

on 16 September 2004 at 15:11

That’s it then smarty pants… we’ll just have to make our own.
You have been warned…

belgianwaffle

on 17 September 2004 at 11:19

Interesting prospect, Jack.