I come back
to the dinner table from the kitchen to find Princess sitting in solitary
splendour, Michael in a bouncy chair and Mr. Waffle and Daniel gone.
“What happened?” I ask her.
“Daniel was
sick on Daddy. On his trousers and on
his t-shirt and on the floor” she gestures expansively “and Daddy say ‘fuck!’”.
on 25 November 2005 at 13:27
Sweetie(s) given
on 25 November 2005 at 13:41
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on 25 November 2005 at 15:53
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on 26 November 2005 at 06:02
What would it be of this world without little Princess remarks? She’s so lovely!! 🙂
Regards, Mr. & Mrs. Waffle.
(And make some silly funny faces to the lovely princes from me, please ^^)
Sweetie(s) given
on 27 November 2005 at 17:32
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on 28 November 2005 at 11:03
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on 28 November 2005 at 16:23
Bless!
Sweetie(s) given
on 28 November 2005 at 16:30
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on 29 November 2005 at 15:45
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on 29 November 2005 at 16:21
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https://www.belgianwaffle.net/2005/11/472/
If I could use the photoshop thingy, I might get rid of the patch of
vomit between them on the sheet or I suppose I could use that time to
change the sheet..
Friar Tuck
on 22 November 2005 at 15:32
on 22 November 2005 at 15:44
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on 22 November 2005 at 16:28
Twin 2: “Shhh! I hear her coming! Just look cute so she doesn’t get suspicious!”
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on 22 November 2005 at 17:34
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on 23 November 2005 at 09:34
Twin 2: Shtill doan geddit. Wha’s she puttin’ in our bocklesh anyway?
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on 23 November 2005 at 10:08
Twin2: Mummmmmy!
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on 23 November 2005 at 11:13
“Yep.”
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on 23 November 2005 at 11:30
(the curse of the younger brother – mine did it too!)
on 23 November 2005 at 12:13
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https://www.belgianwaffle.net/2005/11/469/
My sister
and I spoke on the phone during the week.
Round I
Me: YouÂ’re on speaker and the phone is on my knee.
Her: Why?
Me
(triumphantly): Because I have a baby on each breast – Oh God!
Her: What?
What?
Me: I
dropped Michael.
Her: Oh
God!
Me: Not
very far and on to the sofa, he didnÂ’t like it much though.
Daniel poos.
Me: Did you hear that?
Her: I was trying to ignore it.
Me: That
was your nephew doing a poo.
Her: Too
much information.
Me: But my
life is full of poo at the moment.
Her (tartly):
But mine doesnÂ’t have to be.
Me
(grudgingly): Fair point.
Round II
Me: I was watching “What Not to Wear” the other
night; they say that your sister is the only person who will tell you what your
clothes are really like (though I must say on the evidence presented in the
programme, I believe Trinny and Susannah will as well). So tell meÂ…
Her: No.
Me: Why
not?
Her
(crabbily): I havenÂ’t seen you much
since you were pregnant with the Princess and I criticised one thing then and I
got my nose bitten off.
Me (even
more crabbily): Have you any idea how
hard it is to get nice maternity clothes?
Her (hastily):
Anyway, I havenÂ’t seen your non-maternity wardrobe in years.
Me: ItÂ’s
still all the same.
Her: Pregnant
silence.
Me: Oh I
see.
Knock out
Her:
Anyway, IÂ’ve got to go, I have a meeting.
Me: But you
canÂ’t go, IÂ’m stuck under two feeding babies.
Her: Sorry.
Me
(desperately): But I havenÂ’t got a book or the TV remote to hand and the radio
is off.
Her: Gotta
go, bye, talk to you soon.
I spend the
next while muttering darkly and listening to the telephone beeping while trying
to manouevre myself into a position to switch off the speaker button.
Friar Tuck
on 21 November 2005 at 17:58
on 22 November 2005 at 09:19
FT, wouldn’t worry, she has plenty of indignation for everyone.
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“It
does seem that everyone is having twins. It could be that people are having
their babies when they’re older (I don’t really go with this one, because my
mother didn’t have me until she was 35, and most Irish women who were having 6
and 7 children were having children in their late thirties, or even early
forties, and there didn’t seem to be that many twins).
It
could be that people are having their first pregnancy when they’re older
(Maybe the biological clock says, gosh, at long last a pregnancy, better make
the most of it and produce two).
Or
I have this sort of way out theory that just as there were more boys born
directly after the war (so that the population equilibrium was quickly restored
– New Scientist did a series on this a coupe of years ago, which doesn’t mean
it’s true of course), could it possibly be that less people have babies, so
those who have babies have more of themÂ…. I’ve nothing really to base this on.
Or
how about natural selection. Twins have a high level of family support, develop
advanced social skills, and make their parents very happy, so that they in turn
enter into happy successful relationships and so the “twin gene” gets
passed on and multipliesÂ…. That’s a nice theory!
Or
it could be the pill.”
on 18 November 2005 at 09:45
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on 18 November 2005 at 12:18
Groupie, there may be something in what you say…
Sweetie(s) given
on 20 November 2005 at 14:47
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on 20 November 2005 at 14:49
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https://www.belgianwaffle.net/2005/11/465/
8.30 Mr. Waffle announces that we need bread and milk and he will
purchase same at lunch time. “Well, I can make bread” I say and
then, after a pause for reflection, “and also milk.”
9.00 -11.00 Sit on couch trapped under feeding babies. Ring my
mother and wake her up. Tell her about the Affables’ twins.
She says “was it an IVF pregnancy?”
11.00 – 11.30 Decide to venture out with the boys with a view to
purchasing bread and milk as the rain has stopped. Make elaborate
preparations:
11.45 Decide to knock boys out with formula before leaving. Undo elaborate preparations.
12.00 Boys conked, redo elaborate preparations. Rain starts again. Abandon hope of ever leaving the house.
on 16 November 2005 at 13:40
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on 16 November 2005 at 16:06
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on 17 November 2005 at 17:20
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