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Miscellaneous

25 November, 2005
Posted in: Miscellaneous

I come back
to the dinner table from the kitchen to find Princess sitting in solitary
splendour, Michael in a bouncy chair and Mr. Waffle and Daniel gone. 
“What happened?” I ask her.

“Daniel was
sick on Daddy.  On his trousers and on
his t-shirt and on the floor” she gestures expansively “and Daddy say ‘fuck!’”.

Comments

dmts

on 25 November 2005 at 13:27

She’s got such a brilliant recall. She’s going to make you so proud 0
Sweetie(s) given    

poggle

on 25 November 2005 at 13:41

Good job he does the washing … 0
Sweetie(s) given    

Minkleberry

on 25 November 2005 at 15:53

well, as long as it was daddy, and not daniel… 0
Sweetie(s) given    

gracehart

on 26 November 2005 at 06:02

Ooopsie, the f word… ^^
What would it be of this world without little Princess remarks? She’s so lovely!! 🙂
Regards, Mr. & Mrs. Waffle.
(And make some silly funny faces to the lovely princes from me, please ^^) 0
Sweetie(s) given    

negrito

on 27 November 2005 at 17:32

lol… that’s cool dinner 🙂 0
Sweetie(s) given    

belgianwaffle

on 28 November 2005 at 11:03

Should I say that Irish people swear more than others? Or did you know that already? Lots more than Americans who I find are quite alarmingly polite and nothing like on the telly.. 0
Sweetie(s) given    

Diva

on 28 November 2005 at 16:23

*can’t stop laughing!*

Bless! 0
Sweetie(s) given    

nagnagnag

on 28 November 2005 at 16:30

And who wouldn’t, though?! 0
Sweetie(s) given    

belgianwaffle

on 29 November 2005 at 15:45

Diva, hmm, are you ebcouraging her? NNN, I suppose. 0
Sweetie(s) given    

Diva

on 29 November 2005 at 16:21

God, I’d be hopeless, I would keep giggling and, as kids do love an appreciative audience, it wouldn’t help matters one bit so you’d probably have to put me on the naughty step as an example! :o) 0
Sweetie(s) given    

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https://www.belgianwaffle.net/2005/11/472/

22 November, 2005
Posted in: Miscellaneous

If I could use the photoshop thingy, I might get rid of the patch of
vomit between them on the sheet or I suppose I could use that time to
change the sheet..

Comments

Beth

(Homepage)

on 22 November 2005 at 15:26

“Wait a minute, I thought I was Michael.”    

Friar Tuck

on 22 November 2005 at 15:32

Who is that lady? And why does she keep flashing that bright light in our eyes?    

dmts

on 22 November 2005 at 15:44

Hey, it could be worse! We could have our pictures showing on the internet. 0
Sweetie(s) given    

Diva

on 22 November 2005 at 16:28

Twin 1: “So the master plan is as soon as she changes the sheet we vomit again, like this….”
Twin 2: “Shhh! I hear her coming! Just look cute so she doesn’t get suspicious!” 0
Sweetie(s) given    

cha0tic

on 22 November 2005 at 17:34

“Hang on. Why do I have to lie in your vomit?” 0
Sweetie(s) given    

poggle

on 23 November 2005 at 09:34

Twin 1:Nonono – I shaid, a man walksh into a bar wif an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotshman …
Twin 2: Shtill doan geddit. Wha’s she puttin’ in our bocklesh anyway? 0
Sweetie(s) given    

OliviaJoules

on 23 November 2005 at 10:08

Twin1: If only I could roll…
Twin2: Mummmmmy! 0
Sweetie(s) given    

Locotes

on 23 November 2005 at 11:13

“Are you as tired as I am of being used against your will for caption competitions?”

“Yep.” 0
Sweetie(s) given    

geepeemum

on 23 November 2005 at 11:30

“You’re in a pink sleepsuit too – how old do you think we’ll be before we stop wearing the Princess’s clothes?”
(the curse of the younger brother – mine did it too!)    

belgianwaffle

on 23 November 2005 at 12:13

You people are actually really funny, I think I may do this again, I enjoyed that a lot and I need all the thrills I can get. 0
Sweetie(s) given    

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https://www.belgianwaffle.net/2005/11/469/

20 November, 2005
Posted in: Miscellaneous

My sister
and I spoke on the phone during the week.

 Round I

Me:  YouÂ’re on speaker and the phone is on my knee.

Her: Why?

Me
(triumphantly): Because I have a baby on each breast – Oh God!

Her: What?
What?

Me: I
dropped Michael.

Her: Oh
God!

Me: Not
very far and on to the sofa, he didnÂ’t like it much though.

Daniel poos.

Me:  Did you hear that?

Her:  I was trying to ignore it.

Me: That
was your nephew doing a poo.

Her: Too
much information.

Me: But my
life is full of poo at the moment.

Her (tartly):
But mine doesnÂ’t have to be.

Me
(grudgingly):  Fair point.

 

Round II

Me:  I was watching “What Not to Wear” the other
night; they say that your sister is the only person who will tell you what your
clothes are really like (though I must say on the evidence presented in the
programme, I believe Trinny and Susannah will as well). So tell meÂ…

Her: No.

Me: Why
not?

Her
(crabbily):  I havenÂ’t seen you much
since you were pregnant with the Princess and I criticised one thing then and I
got my nose bitten off.

Me (even
more crabbily):  Have you any idea how
hard it is to get nice maternity clothes?

Her (hastily):
Anyway, I havenÂ’t seen your non-maternity wardrobe in years.

Me: ItÂ’s
still all the same.

Her: Pregnant
silence.

Me: Oh I
see.

 

Knock out

Her:
Anyway, IÂ’ve got to go, I have a meeting.

Me: But you
canÂ’t go, IÂ’m stuck under two feeding babies.

Her: Sorry.

Me
(desperately): But I havenÂ’t got a book or the TV remote to hand and the radio
is off.

Her: Gotta
go, bye, talk to you soon.

I spend the
next while muttering darkly and listening to the telephone beeping while trying
to manouevre myself into a position to switch off the speaker button.

Comments

Friar Tuck

on 21 November 2005 at 17:58

I’m trying, unsuccessfully, to work myself up to the expected level of indignation toward sis.    

belgianwaffle

on 22 November 2005 at 09:19

Yes, Minks and to add insult to injury a parcel arrived from her in the post yesterday for the Princess and the boys and now I feel guilty as well…
FT, wouldn’t worry, she has plenty of indignation for everyone. 0
Sweetie(s) given    

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https://www.belgianwaffle.net/2005/11/467/

17 November, 2005
Posted in: Miscellaneous

“It
does seem that everyone is having twins. It could be that people are having
their babies when they’re older (I don’t really go with this one, because my
mother didn’t have me until she was 35, and most Irish women who were having 6
and 7 children were having children in their late thirties, or even early
forties, and there didn’t seem to be that many twins).

It
could be that people are having their first pregnancy when they’re older
(Maybe the biological clock says, gosh, at long last a pregnancy, better make
the most of it and produce two).

Or
I have this sort of way out theory that just as there were more boys born
directly after the war (so that the population equilibrium was quickly restored
– New Scientist did a series on this a coupe of years ago, which doesn’t mean
it’s true of course), could it possibly be that less people have babies, so
those who have babies have more of themÂ…. I’ve nothing really to base this on.

Or
how about natural selection. Twins have a high level of family support, develop
advanced social skills, and make their parents very happy, so that they in turn
enter into happy successful relationships and so the “twin gene” gets
passed on and multipliesÂ…. That’s a nice theory!

Or
it could be the pill.”

Comments

groupie

on 18 November 2005 at 09:45

There DO seem to be a lot of twins around at the moment. But my older sisters are twins, so I’ve grown up thinking it’s quite normal anyway. At their primary school – a tiny village school – there were something like 3 or 4 other sets of twins there at the same time. Perhaps you just notice twins more when you’ve got a direct connection to some? 0
Sweetie(s) given    

belgianwaffle

on 18 November 2005 at 12:18

Norah, somebody has to look after our pensions, go, produce another.
Groupie, there may be something in what you say… 0
Sweetie(s) given    

cha0tic

on 20 November 2005 at 14:47

I blame the supermarkets. All those 2-for-1 offers must have rubbed off on humanity 🙂 0
Sweetie(s) given    

belgianwaffle

on 20 November 2005 at 14:49

Probably.. 0
Sweetie(s) given    

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https://www.belgianwaffle.net/2005/11/465/

16 November, 2005
Posted in: Miscellaneous

8.30 Mr. Waffle announces that we need bread and milk and he will
purchase same at lunch time.  “Well, I can make bread” I say and
then, after a pause for reflection, “and also milk.”
9.00 -11.00 Sit on couch trapped under feeding babies.  Ring my
mother and wake her up.  Tell her about the Affables’ twins. 
She says “was it an IVF pregnancy?”
11.00 – 11.30 Decide to venture out with the boys with a view to
purchasing bread and milk as the rain has stopped.  Make elaborate
preparations:

11.45 Decide to knock boys out with formula before leaving.  Undo elaborate preparations.
12.00 Boys conked, redo elaborate preparations.  Rain starts again.  Abandon hope of ever leaving the house.

Comments

UndercoverCookie

on 16 November 2005 at 13:40

me too… too funny. 0
Sweetie(s) given    

kristin

(Homepage)

on 16 November 2005 at 14:08

CRYING with laughter over bread … and milk. It’s so true. At one point with my little one i was massively overproducing, and i considered becoming a wet nurse. i thot it might appeal to the yuppified part of the world i was living in at the time. There i was, overeducated, underutilized, and underemployed! it was the perfect solution!    

poggle

on 16 November 2005 at 16:06

Bread and milk – heeheehee …. 0
Sweetie(s) given    

yvonne

(Homepage)

on 16 November 2005 at 17:38

Boy, I admire your sense of humour in the whole thing. I too have three – well spaced – kids. At times it is extremely hectic at my place. I cannot imagine how stressful it must be at your. Hang in there – it does get easier. Just not quickly. 🙂    

belgianwaffle

on 17 November 2005 at 17:20

Yes, thank you, I am hilariously funny. Yvonne, liked your story about your needs not being met. 0
Sweetie(s) given    

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16 November, 2005
Posted in: Miscellaneous

Comments

belgianwaffle

on 17 November 2005 at 17:21

Eating porridge? 0
Sweetie(s) given    

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