belgianwaffle

Archives for May 2008

From the organ of record


Posted in: Reading etc.

Fintan O’Toole writing about a deceased colleague in the Irish Times on Saturday tells us that her “journalism eschewed the gnostic pretence at Olympian insight into events which [etc. etc]..”. Gosh, Fintan, we’re overwhelmed.

Meanwhile, in the book reviews, Alan O’Riordan announces that the “success of Ferris’s [Joshua Ferris’s “Then We Came to the End” ] debut has made third-person narrative this season’s must-have device…”

Well, all I can say is that I hope all authors and aspiring authors are listening.

Reading


Posted in: Reading etc.

“How we are hungry” by Dave Eggers
I didn’t like “A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius” but this was recommended to me and, as I would like to start reading more short stories, I decided to give it a go. I didn’t like most of these stories; they are more clever than they are compelling. For me, they were mostly what I would call “prose pieces” rather than short stories as the story element was singularly missing in a great number of them. All that said, there was one which I thought was excellent (Notes for a Story of a Man Who Will Not Die Alone) and several which I quite enjoyed. I’m not sure they make up for offerings like “The Only Meaning of the Oil-Wet Water”.

“Jane and Prudence” by Barbara Pym

I was looking forward to this. The Glam Potter is very keen. Jilly Cooper, with whom I seem to share an alarming number of favourite authors, is very keen. She said:

“Over the years, as Barbara Pym replaced Nancy Mitford, Georgette Heyer, even Jane Austen, as my most loved author, I devoured all her books, but Jane and Prudence remains my favourite. Even an umpteenth reading this weekend was punctuated by gasps of joy, laughter, sympathy and wonder that this lovely book should remain so fresh, funny and true to life”

It was good. I would certainly read another. It was clever. But I didn’t love it. It certainly wouldn’t replace Nancy Mitford, Georgette Heyer or Jane Austen for me.

“This Charming Man” by Marian Keyes

On the back of this book it says “trust Marian”. I’m not sure you should. The book is packaged as chick lit. All of Marian Keyes’s books have a dark streak in them but this one has far more dark than light. It’s a story of domestic violence told by four different characters. Marnie’s story, in particular, is very creepy in parts. Lola, on the whole, provides the light relief. It is really, really good. The characters are all in their mid 30s and for me that works better than her last book (which I didn’t like very much) where the characters are all in their mid-twenties. I found quite a bit of this story dark, unnerving and disturbing. But interesting. The charming man is a politician and she has a bit of fun with her Irish politicians and political parties – not sure how well this will play in foreign parts but mildly humourous for the locals. Overall, quite excellent but I think she needs to consider changing her book covers.

Also, she has given me a really useful new term: “eco-swot”.

“Slam” by Nick Hornby

I like Nick Hornby, I like teenage fiction. What’s not to like? Well, quite a lot, it transpires. I think that Nick Hornby is an excellent writer and this book is very well written. But it drags. It’s narrated by a nice teenager who gets his girlfriend pregnant and it’s just not very interesting. The plot is all over the place and that’s pretty much it for plot. And it really doesn’t seem to have a particularly coherent structure or to be aiming towards a particular end. It feels like one of those UK government public service advertisements warning about the risks of teenage pregnancy. Thumbs down, I fear.

Vomit – a game of action and adventure for all the family


Posted in: Twins

A game for two or more players. N.B. This game is not suitable for those with carpetted bedroom floors.

Step 1 – Take vomitting child from its bed. Clean child and put in parental bed. Strip child’s bed. Clean floor and any fixtures and fittings sprayed with vomit. One extra point, if you wake sibling while doing so.

Step 2 – Get into bed with sick child. Lie awake tensely listening for sounds that might indicate child is about to be sick. Points will be awarded if you grab sleeping sick child and hold him anxiously over the side of the bed when all he was doing was clearing his throat.

Step 3 – Drift off to sleep to be awoken by the miserable screech of a child who has vomitted all over himself and the bedclothes. Hold him over the edge of the bed and let him vomit copiously on the floor. Extra point if you accede, against your better judgement, to his request for a glass of water which he then vomits up.

Step 4 – Repeat step 3 until you have stripped your bed three times. Then shout jackpot and, if you’re really lucky, sleep uninterrupted for the two hours remaining until dawn breaks.

Step 5 – Repeat with other children over the following nights.

A post reflecting my own recent experience (mercifully past) and inspired by geepeemama‘s woes.

Is there no end to the guilt?


Posted in: Princess, Twins, Youngest Child

Michael is sick today.  Nothing serious just a bit of a cold and a temperature but he stayed at home this morning with his father while the Princess, Daniel and I went to mass.

As we were walking along the Princess commented on how fortunate it was that it wasn’t a creche day and Michael could stay at home. The fact that this was precisely what I was thinking myself in no way mitigated my discomfort.

No, apparently there is no end to the guilt


Posted in: Princess

Me (while watching “Barbie of Swan Lake”): When we go back to Ireland, I’m going to make you watch all of your DVDs in French so that you don’t forget it.

Her (predictably as she is determined to forget every word of French she knows the second we set foot on Irish soil): No, you’re not.

Me: Why not?

Her: Because I won’t watch any DVDs in Ireland.

Me (knowingly): Oh won’t you, indeed, and what will you do?

Her (simply): I will play in my back garden.

Anatomy of an unsuccessful evening


Posted in: Family, Mr. Waffle, Princess, Twins

3 – Number of people who cried before dinner: the Princess because I wouldn’t give her a bowl of cornflakes, Michael because I wouldn’t let him have his party bag from the creche and me because the Princess cannoned in to me while I was sitting on the floor and knocked my head into the cast iron radiator (big bump).

3 – Number of people who actually ate any dinner: me, Mr. Waffle and the Princess (reluctantly), dinner boycotted by the boys (determinedly).

1 – Number of people who sat down triumphantly to a bowl of cornflakes at 8 o’clock.

2 – Number of people who howled hungrily and refused to get into the bath.

1 – Number of people who stayed up on the computer until one in the morning.

1 – Number of people awoken from slumbers in the middle of the night by errant spouse blinding him with bathroom light.