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Mr. Waffle

Principles, What Principles?

2 February, 2006
Posted in: Mr. Waffle, Princess

The Princess has been at home sick for three days.  She’s going back to school tomorrow.  Rejoice.  I’m exhausted.  You know that Mr. Waffle and I are somewhat proud that the Princess doesn’t watch any television?  After two days at home alone with my three children, I rang Mr. Waffle and asked him to stop off at the video shop on the way home and, for God’s sake, pick up something for the Princess.  Hotfoot upon pride comes Nemesis the avenger.  Yeah, she’s on her way up from the school now to taunt me.

Comments

poggleon 02 February 2006 at 14:04

Is that the little girl you met the other day? Nemesis the Avenger, I mean? 0
Sweetie(s) given

kristin(Homepage)

on 02 February 2006 at 17:20

on a recent preschool application form i was requested to note how much television the child watched per day, as well as what kind. it was with great remorse that i wrote ‘disney videos.’
we’ve got a cold here, too. i’m ready to feed her to the wolves.

Minkleberryon 02 February 2006 at 17:23

you’re better parents than us. The wiggles save my sanity for half an hour every day, and probably every 3 hours when I have to feed Seth once Jimi goes back to work!

KateEvanson 02 February 2006 at 20:44

My little one loves to watch television and I encourage it so I can drink cocktails get supper ready, etc. But only normal drama, news, films etc. I don’t want her watching any of that children’s muck. I wonder how long I can keep her ignorant of the wonderful world of teletubbies.

belgianwaffleon 04 February 2006 at 10:24

Mike, quite. Kristin, oh dear, I know PRECISELY how you feel.
Minkleberry, you are a far better parent than I will ever be, you are at home, with two children all the time and an oozing wound to boot and you only watch half an hour’s telly a day. You are my hero.
Kate, you have no oozing wound, you’re clearly just a dreadful parent.

23 January, 2006
Posted in: Mr. Waffle

In an effort to persuade the Princess to give Cinderella a little time off, we have
been doing some work with Snow White.

Me: But Snow White wasnÂ’t really dead, it was just that the poisoned apple had stuck in
her throat. When the handsome prince
kissed her, he dislodged the piece of apple and Snow White woke up.

Mr. W (sotto voce): That’Â’s some kiss.

Comments
Friar Tuck

on 23 January 2006 at 16:55

That prince had high aspirations. ���

jackdalton

on 23 January 2006 at 20:43

Just harmless musing… Still, makes a fella wonder… 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

belgianwaffle

on 25 January 2006 at 08:50

OK, you lot, clean it up. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

poggle

on 25 January 2006 at 15:21

Sorry Ms Waf …
*sniggers* 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

belgianwaffle

on 27 January 2006 at 09:07

Front of the classroom, pog, where I can keep my eye on you.. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

poggle

on 27 January 2006 at 09:27

Am I bovvered? 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

belgianwaffle

on 31 January 2006 at 14:09

And stop chewing that revolting gum. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

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https://www.belgianwaffle.net/2006/01/515/

A Fairy Tale Ending

11 January, 2006
Posted in: Mr. Waffle, Princess

The Princess is obsessed with Cinderella.   We have seen the pantomime, the puppet show, the film and we are in possession of a number of variations of the book.

Last night Mr. Waffle put her to bed and he told me that she did her latest trick inspired by the magic of the fairy godmother.  ““Phtum,”” she said waving an imaginary wand, ““you are Princess and I am Daddy.”

““What did you do?”” I asked. ““What do you think I did?”” he said, ““I lay on her bed while she sat in the chair beside me and told me the story of Cinderella.”

Comments

Diva

on 11 January 2006 at 17:04

Excellent! LOL

Friar Tuck

on 12 January 2006 at 04:18

Come on, admit it. You’re telling us these cute stories about Princess to convince us that we absolutely, positively must have an opportunity to babysit her. You’ve got me convinced.

belgianwaffle

on 12 January 2006 at 09:53

Mike, that’s brought back dreadful memories.
Ta Diva.
FT, you may live to regret this offer.

All Quiet on the Western Front

21 December, 2005
Posted in: Middle Child, Mr. Waffle, Twins, Youngest Child

The other night the boys both slept at the same time. Mr. Waffle arrived downstairs and announced to me, “Our gums are silent””.

Comments

UndercoverCookie on 22 December 2005 at 10:53

haha, that is great. does he blog?

belgianwaffle on 09 January 2006 at 10:20

Pog, mmm…UC, nah, he relies on me to transmit his bons mots.

14 December, 2005
Posted in: Mr. Waffle, Princess, Twins, Youngest Child

For example, last night the Princess sought vainly for my attention as I tried to simultaneously cook dinner and express 200mls of breastmilk (I know 200 mls, amazing eh?). ? Standing under a hot shower in the morning can lead to me spraying the walls with milk in a sort of sub-Psycho fashion (a little too much information?).

Last night, having fed the boys all evening at about 1.00 in the morning, I prodded my poor spouse awake and said “give Michael a bottle, I can’t stand it any more”. 

At 5.00, I woke up and having fed the babies, trotted out to the kitchen to take meat out of the freezer for dinner (which I had forgotten to do last night, no, this is not a regular feature of my
nights).   On opening the fridge, I found that the expressed bottle of breast milk was still there, which meant that Mr. Waffle had, all gasp please, given Michael formula earlier in the evening.

Since my husband had disappeared from the marital bed, I had a look round the house for him to discuss this serious matter. Found him on the couch looking up the phone book for the number of a local bookshop. He wanted to order a Princess Waffle memorial book for the creche. I had to have out the matter of expressed milk v formula so I was only momentarily distracted by the weirdness of his timing.

Me: You gave Michael FORMULA.
Him: Eh?
Me: When you gave him the bottle.
Him: Oh right.
Me: But there was expressed milk in the fridge.
Him: Sorry, missed it.
Me (purple in the face with indignation): What?
Him: Are we really arguing about this at 5.00 in the morning?
Both collapse in mildly hysterical giggles as oddness of my behaviour becomes apparent.

A little tired today…

Comments

Bobble

on 14 December 2005 at 09:59

“Standing under a hot shower in the morning can lead to me spraying the walls with milk in a sort of sub-Psycho fashion”

Minkleberry

on 14 December 2005 at 12:19

I’m still overwhelmed with admiration at your ability to feed two new(ish) and hungry babies.
At 5am I was ignoring my big child as he whimpered for attention in his bedroom, whilst simultaneously avoiding eye-contact with the cot that is now sharing our bedroom.
Incidentally, me and Jimi have some of our best rows in the wee hours.

Peggy

(Homepage)

on 14 December 2005 at 13:14

I’m very impressed by the happy ending of your story.
I think I would have poured the expressed milk in the bottle of coffee that Jim takes to work everyday.

geepeemum

on 14 December 2005 at 16:51

Ummm – sleeping?

beachhutman

on 14 December 2005 at 21:59

Formula is very GOOD you know…….

belgianwaffle

on 15 December 2005 at 12:27

BhM, formula is the root of all evil, don’t quibble.
GPM, very dull..
Peggy, how imaginative you are.
Minks, am awaiting your new arrival with bated breath. Unlike Ez, I suspect.
Bobble, we aim to please.
HJB, 2 sweeties, you are too kind. For this, I can confirm that there are no mad axe men in Switzerland.

Friar Tuck

on 15 December 2005 at 16:28

I can remember a day in the not-so-distant past when a certain someone smugly smirked at me because I must arise at 5.30 every morning. So for the record I would just like to say that at 5.00 this morning I was snug in my bed. {smirk}

belgianwaffle

on 16 December 2005 at 11:08

My agony will end. Smirk.

https://www.belgianwaffle.net/2005/12/488/

Sleeping Patterns

7 December, 2005
Posted in: Middle Child, Mr. Waffle, Twins, Youngest Child

Michael will only sleep in a parentÂ’’s arms, preferably mine.  Ideally he likes to sleep with his little gums clenched to my breast.  I feel like an enormous soother.  Last night he wailed until brought into bed with us.  Mr. Waffle had earlier been complaining that the bed was clammy (I refuse to change the sheets more than once a week. Who am I? Jackie Kennedy?*  Did baby vomit ever hurt anyone?) ““Obviously, Michael doesn’Â’t find it clammy,” ” I said. ““HeÂ’’s no judge,”” retorted my loving spouse, ““10 weeks ago he was floating around in amniotic fluid”.”

Daniel loves the mobile that hangs over the cot and whenever it is turned on he laughs with delight.  He tends to wake up once or twice a night, eat and go back to sleep.  One night when I
went to rescue a wailing Michael from the cot (What am I doing here? Take me to the clammy bed this instant! WhereÂ’s my enormous dummy?), I noticed that Daniel was wide awake as well
and instead of wailing he was smiling benignly up at the cot mobile.  Clearly, he’Â’s an easy to please middle child.

* My mother says that she had her sheets changed twice a day.  Well, wouldn’t you, if you were married to JFK?

Comments

Bobble

on 07 December 2005 at 10:28

Waffly you never cease to amaze. If your hubby thinks you are the inimitable Jackie-O it’s time to ask for a bigger dress / spa / sunglasses allowance x

giftofthegab

on 07 December 2005 at 19:17

twice a day????

kristin

(Homepage)

on 08 December 2005 at 02:25

i heard that was when she was with Ari. Which, really, just echoes your point, Waffley, about wouldn’t you want to change the sheets if you were married to jfk — well, all the more so if you’re married to an extremely small, extremely wrinkly greek shipping magnate.

Beth

(Homepage)

on 08 December 2005 at 14:40

I don’t know what you are talking about, my sheets are pristine. The duvet, however, is covered in vomit. I wonder what Jackie O’s policy on duvets was?

belgianwaffle

on 08 December 2005 at 15:11

Beth, I am wild with envy. Cannot say what the policy on duvets was..
Kristin, can’t help feeling that JFK was more likely to have been romping about in the marital bed with third parties, whatcha reckon?
GOTG, see previous.
Bobble, you are so kind, I think this is an outstanding suggestion.
Teverde, SECOND chicken little? You deserve danger money.

beachhutman

on 08 December 2005 at 21:58

Now on THIS one I’m with Mr W.

belgianwaffle

on 09 December 2005 at 08:15

Hmm, what’s everybody’s problem with clammy?

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