Princess

Crazy Bike Lady Rides Again

16 May, 2021
Posted in: Boys, Daniel, Dublin, Ireland, Michael, Mr. Waffle, Princess, Siblings

Monday, May 3, 2021

My friend L offers to host live, in person book club from her back garden on May 30. Words can barely describe how delighted I am. Then my hairdresser texted to ask if I would like an appointment. Where will the thrills end? For reasons which are largely pandemic related I haven’t had my hair cut since November 2019 and it hasn’t been this long since I was in college. And it is driving me crazy. This will all end on May 21.

Mr. Waffle and I cycled out in the rain for a couple of hours into an entirely new cycle way previously unknown to us and within 5kms of our house.

Readers, how did we miss this?

In fairness to us, I will say that signage was not at all what it might be. It was drawn to our attention, however, by the beacon of investigative journalism that is Lovin’ Dublin.

The rain was a bit stop start and in between showers it was very pretty. And we had our waterproof trousers.

As we’ve cycled round the city, I’ve noticed some very clever layouts near schools which aim to slow traffic while also being appealing to look at. I spend much of my time complaining about street furniture (this is middle age lads) but I think this is lovely.

After finishing up Hamlet the previous night which took a lot out of us, we decided that Shakespeare over zoom was not for us and gracefully bowed out of future adventures of this kind.

We cleaned the house. I am sick of the cleaning rota.

I heard that the blogger who I mentioned previously who is about the same age as me with children about my children’s age has died. It made me feel so sad for all the lost opportunities and for her children and her husband. I am counting my blessings again and, really, they are many.

Tuesday, May 4, 2021

Re-entry to work after the bank holiday weekend was trying. To offset the pain I received clothes from an order I had placed at the weekend (very speedy in fairness). I’d bought a pair of plain navy chinos. When I opened the package, I discovered to my horror that they had an elasticated waist. I thought that I would just try them on before sending them back. Oh my goodness, so comfortable, made of some super soft fabric and, you know, elasticated. I’m keeping them, I feel like some Rubicon has been crossed but I almost don’t care.

Wednesday, May 5, 2021

I tried on the new expensive perfume Mr. Waffle gave me for my birthday. Daniel asked why our house smelt like my parents’ house. I wondered vaguely why there was a burning smell upstairs. It turned out it was the perfume which has, not unpleasant, peat fire undertones. The website describes it thus:

a delectable haze of burnt chestnuts laced with a fine trace of golden caramel. It gradually reveals a voluptuous blend of rich Haïtian vetiver, cardamom and red pepper bathed in the delicate floral notes of cassia absolute and lush jasmine blossoms

I mean, whatever you’re having yourself. Would recommend actually but that may be because it smells like my parents’ house, I cannot say.

Michael is starring in a film at school. Daniel was given the opportunity to participate also but turned it down in favour of painting planters while wearing a bin bag [the bin bag was the school’s innovative way of keeping their uniforms paint free]. Sometimes the Transition Year programme is exciting and innovative, sometimes it involves painting planters while wearing black bin bags.

I met a friend for a walk in the park at lunch time. It hailed on us. We pulled up our hoods and kept walking proving that Irish women in their 50s are unstoppable.

Thursday, May 6, 2021

It was a beautiful day. The boys had a 20km walk as part of their TY programme so Mr. Waffle said we should drive them to school. I did but I felt very guilty in my big behemoth as I passed fleets of primary school children going in either alone or with their parents on bicycles. By waving and driving very slowly and carefully, I tried to explain that I was really one of their number and not a person who would drive children to school on a beautiful day despite the very visible evidence to the contrary. To my absolute horror, herself said that the children on bicycles were a bit of a pain as they tended to be less safe in traffic. Where did she get these notions? Not from me. I pointed out forcefully that if all these children were driven to school it would be much more dangerous for her than having them cycling. She was unrepentant.

The school has a retired nun in her 80s who is very active and does various projects and so on with the students in the school. They all love her (not how I felt about the nuns who taught me but, good, I guess). Anyhow she has written a book and we were all bidden to the online launch of the book by the new Archbishop of Dublin. I had a look. Herself tells me her class were all on whatsapp commenting. The enthusiasm levels. The new Archbishop does not appear to speak Irish with any fluency (or at all?) however, he was willing in fairness to him. He gave a longish speech and I found myself forcibly reminded of the more boring sermons that I have had to sit through. Now that I am on the verge of being let back into in person mass, I’m not so sure I want to anymore.

Daniel skipped training as he was still exhausted from his 20km walk.

Mr. Waffle pointed me towards the HSA website where the return to work video/questionnaire assumed everyone would be driving back to work and I sent them an email pointing out that they should be encouraging walking and cycling and I realised that I have actually gone full crazy cycle lady.

Friday, May 7, 2021

The mother-in-law of one of my colleagues died suddenly during the week. She was from a small town in the west of Ireland and my colleague’s wife had been going down every weekend for the past couple of months to mind her mother. That’s been tough on him and their young children. Last weekend when his wife was leaving, his mother-in-law slipped €200 into her hand. Then she died unexpectedly on Wednesday night. I almost cried when I heard this. Before my mother got sick, I never left Cork without getting €50 slipped to me at the station – this continued long after I stopped needing the extra cash. You know this business of love languages? The love language of the Irish mother is cash slipped into the hands of their children as they head off from home.

Mr. Waffle bought a hammock from a crowd in Cork called Hammockology. Having grown up in the tropics, he’s always had a soft spot for a hammock. I am astounded that there is a viable business in this in North Cork though.

The lilac has been amazing this year and I am delighted with it. The rest of the family are entirely indifferent. In other gardening news, our grass on a roll has thrived despite Mr. Waffle lifting it up (i.e. pulling it out by the roots) to see whether it was growing. The only problem is that it is showing up our existing grass somewhat.

I finally persuaded herself to lodge her birthday cheques. We went to an outside lodgement machine and it was “out of service” but we could hear noises inside and I said, “Wait, wait, they might be just restocking it.” We waited. Herself stuck her head in the bank window to see what was going on but a grumpy lady closed it instantly. We waited 15 minutes and gave up in despair. As we were driving away (more guilty driving when we could really have cycled), herself saw someone go up to the machine. We turned around and lo and behold it was working. I was a bit peeved with Bank of Ireland. They could clearly hear us hanging around outside because we could hear them working inside. Would it have killed them to have intervened in our speculative conversation as to whether the machine was going to come back into service with the joyous tidings that it was? Perhaps you had to be there but I was pretty annoyed.

We were listening to music in the car and I asked her whether she knew any numbers by the Corrs. She did not so I had her put on “Runaway”. She was reading the comments under the song on youtube and said, “Oh dear.” “What?” I asked. “This was put up in 2017 and one of the comments is “I’m going to walk down the aisle to this beautiful song in October 2020.” Oh dear indeed.

Saturday, May 8, 2021

I had an appointment to collect a poster from the framers at 10. I woke up at 9.57 and was there at 10.05. Honestly this represents a personal record.

I also picked up my new bike from the bike shop. I am delighted.

I found the cemetery where Francis Johnston is buried within our 5kms. A hidden cemetery relatively distant from the church. I am astounded by all the things I have found in my 5kms. Sadly the cemetery is locked and a bit overgrown. Mr. Waffle has a colleague who is big in the Church of Ireland and I’m hoping he can tell us how to get in.

I proposed an outing to the children and herself said to me, “Do you know what your problem is? You have very lock down 1 energy, this is lock down 4, you have to stop proposing things.” This may be true.

Sunday, May 9, 2021

We took the boys on the new cycle path we’d discovered (lock down 1 energy). It didn’t rain on us. Small thrills.

Mr. Waffle had a work call at 5 so we scuttled back to the house reasonably promptly. Herself spent an hour on the phone with her friend speaking German. It was broadly satisfactory she said but they were both a bit concerned that they were compounding each other’s errors.

Daniel and Michael are both growing like mad. For the first time in ages, at the moment, Michael is taller than Daniel.

Mr. Waffle has taken to posting Pringles containers back to the manufacturers for recycling (I am not the only crazy person in this household – our consumption of Pringles has increased due to Cinema night, I offer by way of explanation for this development). They had an arrangement where you put them in a box and sent them back free post. But as of Monday week, he has to go to UPS in Swords (North Co. Dublin) to recycle them and I’m beginning to wonder whether it’s diminishing returns.

Monday, May 10, 2021

Mr. Waffle had to go to virtual abroad and was up at the crack of dawn due to the time difference.

We got a letter about a confirmed Covid case in the school. These used to worry me but now I am utterly blasé.

The libraries re-opened! Hallelujah. I got a notification that the book I had ordered had arrived. I went in and picked it up – our local library was open until 8 – and also had a lovely browse for myself. I have missed the library. I do not miss the head high pile of books on the hall table which I was finally able to return.

Daniel had a zoologist in for the day to talk to his class. It sounded a bit unpromising but actually he loved it and found it really fascinating.

Tuesday, May 11, 2021

I registered to get the vaccine. Happy day.

My sister sent us an unexpected hamper of goodies. Happy day.

I had my last parents’ council meeting of the year and Mr. Waffle had the residents’ committee and Daniel had training. All over zoom except training but it was a busy evening, I can tell you.

Mr. Waffle got his first haircut since November. I was delighted. His father came of age in the 1970s and liked to keep his locks flowing and with Mr. Waffle’s long hair, it began to increasingly feel that I was living with my father-in-law or, possibly, Boris Johnson.

I met the press officer in work for a quick cup of tea at the end of the day and she came bearing all the day’s papers which I took home with me. Herself started going through them in the kitchen and as I was on my zoom parents’ council meeting, I heard her saying in bemusement to Mr. Waffle, “The Examiner is all about Cork.” She should really know that that’s the point.

Wednesday, May 12, 2021 – Update from the house of vermin

The cat caught another mouse. She had it in the kitchen (let’s pretend to ourselves that she didn’t catch it there, will we?) and Mr. Waffle tried to usher her and the mouse outside making the rookie error of not closing the kitchen door so the mouse skittered out into the hall with the cat in hot pursuit. She eventually tracked the mouse down under the sofa where she killed it and ate it. Dear Lord, it is, as my daughter would say, a lot.

Herself has basically been advised to go into purdah in case she gets Covid or is a close contact and cannot sit the Leaving. She’s a bit tense about it all but I am reasonably optimistic. If the worst comes to the worst she can fall back on her calculated grades (grades given by the school – we had to do French outside of school which was a pain but we got there) which I imagine will be good. The way it works is that she will get the better of the school calculated grade or the written examination grade and she won’t ever be told what the school grade was so it’s not clear at this stage how she will do. I do feel for her, there’s so much uncertainty.

Michael’s class had the zoologist for the day. He didn’t enjoy it as much as Daniel, apparently Daniel had told us all the good bits already.

Thursday, May 13, 2021

The hammock arrived. We are delighted. My colleague who is 56 got vaccinated today. With any luck my vaccination should be in 4 days then – that’s Monday. Fingers firmly crossed.

Daniel and Michael went off to Kildare with the school and spend the day shooting at each other with air guns and learning archery. They seem to have liked it.

Friday, May 14, 2021

The boys finally got their hair cut. The Chinese woman who cuts their hair kept commenting on how handsome Daniel had got. “He was fat with a round face and red hair, and now he’s handsome,” she said admiringly. Several times. As Daniel said, it was hard to really feel that she was complimenting him. “How could she think you were fat?” I asked him. “Well,” said he, “remember she’s the woman who said to me before that she felt I should share my food with my brother?”

Anyway, they both look fantastic. Delighted.

The health service has had a major IT attack and the nation is being held to ransom but we’re not paying it appears. Apparently vaccinations are unaffected, we will see. I am very glad that I have no elderly relatives in hospital at the moment, I will say that.

Saturday, May 15, 2021

We’d been due to go to the cousins’ house for an outdoor dining experience but it lashed. I mean, really, the Irish weather has a lot to answer for. We’re going to try for next weekend.

Mr. Waffle and I explored Malahide between showers. It’s a small seaside coastal commuter town. The pedestrianisation of the main street is a matter of bitter debate. I mean it’s very small and very drive aroundable but to hear the debate you’d swear people’s cars were being taken away. This country. Yes, we drove out there. What’s your point?

Daniel had training again, they appear to be making up for lost time. I don’t know when he’ll be able to play an actual match, the poor child.

Our local chipper does nice gelato so we went to get some. We discovered that now he’s selling sourdough bread and we got some of that too. Notions lads. The local graffiti writers may have a point.

Sunday, May 16, 2021

Herself has a head cold. Notwithstanding purdah. Michael and Mr. Waffle and I went for a cycle in a bit of the park to we’d never been in before rejoicing in the name of “Furry Glen”. It was grand if oddly named. Admire my beautiful new bicycle going through the trees as captured by Michael, perhaps not entirely spontaneously.

Still no notification on the vaccine but you never know, fingers crossed for next week.

In a moment of madness I ordered Michel Barnier’s Brexit diary from the FNAC. It arrived today and looks every bit as dull as you imagine it might. Have I lost my mind?

Finally, apparently we will be able to travel to England, Scotland and Wales from June. I am now seriously thinking of a 3 week holiday in the UK in August. Give me your holiday recommendations please! Hidden gems lads. I mean, I’d love to go to Devon and Cornwall but I imagine it’s much too late to look to book something now.

Light at the End of the Tunnel

2 May, 2021
Posted in: Boys, Daniel, Dublin, Ireland, Michael, Mr. Waffle, Princess

Monday, April 19, 2021

I put away my winter clothes and took out my summer clothes. I was not super-skinny last summer so it was with some dismay that I discovered that a pair of trousers which were loose last year will no longer close. Alas. I blame take-away night.

The principal of the school sent an email to all parents outlining how children should behave to ensure that they are safe walking, cycling and getting the bus to school. At no point did he mention that cars create a lot of the danger, in fact, he made it look like the only safe way to get to school was by car. I was annoyed. I sent an email to the school pointing out that we are supposed to be a healthy school which is fighting climate change and this is hardly a helpful message. Everyone else in the family laughed at me. Have I tipped over the edge into blinkered single-issue pressure group type person? I would prefer not to know, I think.

Tuesday, April 20, 2021

We all very much enjoyed the European Super League story which, Daniel, as our sports expert in chief explained to us in detail over dinner.

An old friend of my father’s (they first met in 1943 when he was 16 and my father was 18) rang to say that he had written a short memoir of my father and would I like it? I did like it, very much. It was a very kind thing to have done. I am happy to report that the author is a very sprightly 94 year old. While I knew many of the stories he told of my father, it was so interesting to see some things I had never heard at all and to hear the familiar stories from one of his contemporaries rather than as told to his family. The children really liked it as well.

I think about my father every day. I feel the world is a poorer place for not having him in it. There’s a Cork guy who does these funny videos about the Cork upper middle classes (a complex and intricate group – Cork is the place that gave us the merchant princes and the lines: No snob like a Cork snob and the haves and the have yachts). He often begins by addressing people as “old stock”. My father used that expression a lot – it seems to have fallen out of favour now but it was common when I was younger. Every time his videos start “Hello, old stock” I feel a little bit sad. Also, the man who makes the videos was a couple of years ahead of me in College. He was a popular debater, a lanky red head and I was appalled by how old he’s got in the 32 years or so since I last saw him. I digress. I haven’t been to Cork since my father’s funeral in December and I’m finding that pretty hard.

Wednesday, April 21, 2021

Uneventful.

Thursday, April 22, 2021

The boys had a treasure hunt on bikes in the park. Now that they’re back in school and things are relaxing a bit, their Transition Year experience is belatedly getting going. They had a good time.

We turned off the Aga.

The principal called me and said I was absolutely right about his email on travelling to school and he would bear my comments in mind for future communications. Vindicated! Or perhaps he’s just scared of my single-minded lunacy?

Friday, April 23, 2021

My friend asked whether Mr. Waffle and I would like to do a reading of Hamlet over zoom with half a dozen of his friends. It’s more fun than it sounds, said he. I hope so because we agreed to do it.

Saturday, April 24, 2021

It was an absolutely beautiful day. I persuaded Mr. Waffle to cycle out to Dun Laoghaire with me. This has been a long-held ambition of mine as I want to test the cycle infrastructure which has been much discussed in the letters pages of the Irish Times (which purports to be a national newspaper, snort). Imagine my horror when, arriving in Sandymount to test the segregated cycle lane which has been written about in the letters page for the last year, I discovered that it has not yet been built. I can only imagine the post bag it will generate if they ever actually go ahead and build it.

In fairness, from Booterstown onwards, provision was pretty good but that was near the end of our trek.

We had an ice cream on the pier when we got there. I wanted two flakes in my 99 (judge away) and the man in the booth said, “I’m going to have to charge you for the second flake.” Unsurprising but he explained that he was on his last box and all of the ice cream shops were running out. “The flakes were on the boat that got stuck in the Suez canal and there’s a shortage everywhere.” How’s that for an interconnected world for you?

We got the DART back to town with our bikes. It’s probably the first time I’ve been on public transport in about a year but it was grand.

My friend in Brussels tells me that she will be getting her jab on Tuesday. It is so thrilling to be nearing the end of the road on this one.

Sunday April 25, 2021

Encouraged by the excitement of our Saturday trip to Dun Laoghaire, I persuaded herself to cycle out to Howth which is a seaside town about 15kms north of our house.

The cycling infrastructure was really terrific. We were off road beside the sea for most of the journey. The tide was in and the views were beautiful but there was a strong headwind which made the trip hard work. It took us about an hour and a half.

When we got there we queued for an hour and a half for chips from Beshoff’s. Honestly, if I had known how long it would take when we started I would never have gone there. To my horror, there was a further queue for collection after you reached the top of the queue for ordering. Disastrous. We were ravenous by the time we got our chips and frozen after queuing in the shadows. However, we perked up after eating and were able to walk the length of the town admiring the sea views. A kind guard took a break from trying mildly to break up large groups to direct us to the public toilets. They had both soap and toilet paper: a real win.

We got the Dart home. More public transport excitement.

My sister-in-law in England got an appointment for her vaccine. V. thrilling.

Monday April 26, 2021

Mr. Waffle cycled to his mother’s nursing home in Monkstown in 45 minutes so half an hour less than it took him to cycle there at the weekend with me. On the other hand, he’d never have cycled at all if I hadn’t shown him how quickly it could be done. So, a win for me.

My neighbour, born on the street and residents’ committee stalwart, died. She was fine until February but then she had a stroke and when she went into hospital, they found she had cancer and she went into a nursing home. Pretty miserable couple of months, I imagine but she was very well up to then and I’d say she was in her 80s.

Someone I know through blogging told me that someone else I sort of knew, someone about my own age – with children of an age with mine – has got cancer and gone into palliative care. Even though I didn’t know this person, it felt like I did a bit and it seems so very sad.

A colleague told me that her husband (who is a bit older) has been vaccinated. The delight.

I had lunch in the park with a former colleague and it felt normal sitting there in the sunshine exchanging gossip. A harbinger of things to come, I hope.

The extremely expensive new bin didn’t close when I went to put something into it and I spent half an hour before bed embracing it trying to persuade it to close with the same smooth action as earlier. A romantic end to the day.

Tuesday, April 27, 2021

A colleague texted me in the morning asking could I cover a meeting for him as he had been summoned to the nursing home where his father had slipped into a coma. I think our age brings a lot of dying parents. Grim and Covid makes it all grimmer.

Michael sent us a pdf of the book that his year wrote with the creative writing centre. He was delighted with himself. He had two short stories in it and there will be a hard copy in due course (reasonably limited print run). The forward was written by Sheila O’Flanagan where she dutifully name checks all of the young authors and their work. “I didn’t realise Sheila O’Flanagan was involved,” said I. “Yeah,” said Michael, “and there were a couple of other authors too but I can’t remember their names. None of them was as much fun as Roddy Doyle.” The little ingrate. I’m really grateful to all these authors who gave their time to this for, as far as I can tell, no reward (we certainly didn’t pay anything, perhaps they get a grant from the arts council – I hope so).

Hallelujah, the GAA is back and Daniel went out to training. He really missed it. Also, I call on you to admire how many of the under-16s are cycling to training. Very gratifying.

Dan had his last day of his outside school TY course. The whole thing was online and it was a bit grim. Herself did the same course when she was in Transition Year and once a week trekked out to the university campus where it was held and made loads of like minded friends. It was just a much less good experience for poor Dan. What about Michael you may ask. Well, I suggested that he might do the exam to get in but he said, “What, an exam to do more school work, are you mad?” So that was that.

Wednesday, April 28, 2021

Our neighbour’s funeral is on Friday and the hearse is going to drive up the road and all the neighbours are going to stand outside their houses which is nice. Another neighbour sent details of when the funeral home was open for viewing the body explaining that the funeral home couldn’t advertise this due to Coronavirus restrictions. Some issues there, I feel.

At work, myself and a colleague discovered that we had learnt all the same poetry by heart for the Leaving Cert and to the bemusement of younger colleagues began to quote it. Apparently, they learnt no poetry off by heart although one of them was able to quote by heart some of the notes on the poems which they had been forced to learn. Hardly a satisfactory development. My progress towards crazy old lady is proceeding apace you will observe.

Thursday, April 29, 2021

Another new road map has been published. I will be able to register for vaccination next week. To register to get vaccinated and not to actually get vaccinated but it’s definitely a cheering prospect.

The boys had a driving instructor come to the school and they drove around the school yard and learnt how to change a tyre, add coolant and top up windscreen cleaning fluid. They also found out how much insurance costs and how to get a quote for it (the boys in the class were outraged by how much cheaper it is for girls); how much motor tax is; and how to pass the driving test including sitting a mock theory test. They had a great time. What a shame they couldn’t have been doing this kind of thing all year. In fairness, their Transition Year co-ordinator seems to be packing in as much as he possibly can into the last weeks of the year.

Friday, April 30, 2021

The start of the May bank holiday weekend, hurrah! When I got home from work, Michael was in the kitchen. He was unpacking the shopping unaided as everyone else was out. He was in great form. They’ve been making a film in school and he plays a guard. The Gardaí came in from the local station to talk to them about investigative techniques and to allow them to use the Garda car as a prop for one of their scenes. Taking community policing to the next level.

I went into the study to fetch a pen and there was Mr. Waffle in a conference call, when I checked Daniel and herself were both upstairs. Michael was surprised but indifferent. He thought they were out. In fact, shortly after, herself hurtled out the door to meet a friend in the park. She had a great time but her friend is an inveterate walker and walked the legs off her. Good for her as I helpfully pointed out. This is what mothers are for.

My lilac has come out in the garden and I am delighted. Herself said, “I can see you having a beautiful garden when you retire and have more time to spend there.” I was quite flattered but also vaguely insulted as, you know, I don’t think of retirement as exactly imminent.

Mr. Waffle tells me that the cat came into the kitchen at lunch time with another mouse in her jaws. I like to think that she is catching them outside the house but I fear that I’m only fooling myself. Anyway Mr. Waffle picked her up by her midriff and tossed her (mouse and all) out the front door and when she came back the mouse was gone. Frankly, I doubt that this ended well for the mouse.

As the economy is beginning to re-open and my waistline expansion has to end, we had our last Friday night take-away. We were all pretty cheerful about it as it feels like it heralds a return to normality.

Saturday, May 1, 2021

Herself went off for a long cycle with a friend and came back in great form. Daniel had training and also came back in a very good mood. I was so glad for them. They have had a long hard lock down. Michael has quite enjoyed it really.

While the others were out, Michael volunteered to top up the reserve for cleaning the windscreen in the car applying his lessons from earlier in the week. I hovered while he tipped in a small amount from the tiny bottle. “That seems like hardly any,” I said. “No, you’re only supposed to put in a quarter of the bottle,” he insisted. “Nonsense,” said I, I can see there’s a massive reservoir down there.” I tipped the lot in. “For someone who didn’t know how to to do this, you seem to have very strong views,” said Michael crossly. He had the last laugh anyway – it’s concentrated and the small bottle needed five litres of water which definitely did not fit in the container under the bonnet. Look, how bad is a soapy windscreen for a while? It’s always raining here anyway.

We had our first night of Hamlet over zoom. God, I love my friends but it was tough going. I am not cut out for Shakespeare over zoom. Or possibly for Shakespeare at all. My friend M who has a lovely voice sang “We’ll keep the red flag flying” at the end given the day that was in it and that was possibly a highlight.

Sunday, May 2, 2021

Building on the success of last weekend, Mr. Waffle, Daniel and I cycled to Howth. Daniel had agreed to do this in a moment of weakness and was resigned to his fate. It was extremely successful. Firstly, the wind was behind us and it took us only about an hour to get out which compares pretty well with driving to be honest. When we got there, we did not go to Beshoff’s. We went to Wright’s which was pricier but had no queue. They gave us a little buzzer and we were able to walk the pier and look at the seals while we were waiting for our food. V satisfactory.

We got the Dart home again. Delighted with myself. We have put off the cleaning rota to tomorrow as it is, apparently, going to rain and there will be nothing else to do. I feel that this is unwise but I can’t face it this evening. I am looking forward to when we can have our cleaner back.

We have the second part of Hamlet this evening at 7.30. Alas alack.

I trust that you too are getting closer to vaccination or, better yet, are vaccinated already. Give me your vaccine good news stories.

Tá na Torthaí Seo Tuillte Agat*

18 April, 2021
Posted in: Boys, Daniel, Dublin, Family, Ireland, Michael, Princess, Siblings

Wednesday, April 7, 2021

This was the last day of my Easter holidays. Mr. Waffle was back at work but he took some time off to cycle along the canal and through the park with me. It was fine but, honestly, I am beginning to think that I know every inch of my 5kms.

I spent a lot of the day practising German with herself. She’s really come on in leaps and bounds. The non-stop German television is definitely helping. Also, she has been consulting this textbook which has spent the past 37 years lying dormant on a shelf in my parents’ house waiting for its chance to shine again. I enjoyed the oral sample questions which included “Does your mother work?” Honestly, Mr. Cockburn, all mothers work.

Thursday, April 8, 2021

The German teacher came into school on her holidays to give them all a mock oral. Herself said it went ok but she wasn’t delighted.

I went back to work and spent the whole day thinking it was Monday which was confusing. on the plus side, I didn’t have to speak German.

I have been targetted by a toilet brush ad on instagram and the worst thing about it is that I’m slightly intrigued.

I was chatting to a friend whose son is doing his finals next month. It’s a three year degree and he basically only spent a year of it physically in college. I feel so, so sorry for those young people whose college experience has been largely online.

I did the enneagram personality test for fun and then made them all do it at home. Not my most fantastic idea ever. Everyone’s results were a bit scarring except Michael’s, he’s a nine and simply the best.

Friday, April 9, 2021

I got myself a new bike. It is in the shop but the parts, ordered from Germany, could take 9 weeks. I can’t even blame Brexit. I love the bike. It’s an omafiets and I don’t even care. The brakes on my own bike are a bit dodgy at the moment and I wasn’t going to bother getting them fixed (having spent €200 on an overhaul only a couple of months ago – this was the final straw which persuaded me to get a new bike) but now, I’m wondering whether this is entirely wise as 9 weeks is a bit of a stretch to ride a bike with dodgy brakes.

We watched another episode of “Wer Kann, Der Kann” and understood everything. It was a walk in the park after season 1 of “Charité”. Truly, she seemed ready for her oral.

Saturday, April 10, 2021

Herself had her Leaving Cert German oral. It seems to have gone really well. I’m delighted for her. Not just for the exam but because she is really enjoying the language and it’s something she’ll have for the rest of her life (though, like mine, it may need brushing up, of course). She’s worked so hard on her German over the past couple of months, I’m really glad that it’s paid off for her.

A school friend of mine lives in north county Dublin and, in peacetime, we meet up a couple of times a year for dinner and a chat. With Covid, I haven’t seen her since November 2019 and she called me out of the blue today to say hello and how are things. We arranged that next weekend when our 5km limit is lifted we will go out to the beach near her house for a walk. Delighted with myself. I asked about her family and then she asked about mine and said, “How is your mother managing in the nursing home?” And I said, “Um, my mother is dead, remember you came to the funeral?” God love her, she was mortified but it was kind of hilarious. We’ve reached the age where lots of people’s parents are dying or infirm and it can be difficult to keep track. I told her about my father dying at Christmas, she hadn’t heard and this added to her general levels of mortification. But look, really with Covid and everything, we are where we are.

I was genuinely thrilled to hear that a friend of a friend whom I’ve known since I was about 13 has just got a very important job. She’s a lovely person and the first woman ever in the role. Sometimes it feels like you have to be a bit ruthless and heartless to get these kinds of jobs and it fills my middle-aged heart with joy to see someone so kind filling such a significant role. Also, she’s from Cork. I mean, really, what’s not to love? It perked up my day considerably.

Herself and myself went into town to stock up on birthday goodies. She is facing into her second lock down birthday. Alas.

Sunday, April 11, 2021

Herself celebrated her fake birthday. Her 18th birthday (full, full birthday post to follow), falls on Monday, April 12. We had a somewhat elaborate birthday breakfast.

Then we zoomed with her aunt and uncle in Cork. Her aunt had spent some time planning and had 18 (yes, 18) presents for her to open including a big fat cheque. Her uncle had sent her a fat bank draft. Aiming to outdo his sister, he went to make it out for a round number +€18. On discovering that a bank draft cost €3.50 he had it made out for a large round number +€14.50. I cannot tell you how typical this is of my brother. Herself was pleased. He also wrote her a letter saying that she didn’t have to send a thank you letter no matter what her mother said. Hmm.

Then we had an afternoon birthday tea. As she said, “Don’t think I haven’t noticed that the ‘y’ is missing on the Happy Birthday sign.” Alas. I also had the greatest difficulty in finding numbered candles and, in fact she blew out 78 with the cross taken off the 7 rather than 18. Look, there’s a pandemic on. I bought a pricey enough cake from a local artisan but I am not entirely sure that she liked it. Alas again.

As part of her German prep she made her phone language German. She used to have it in French but her new found dedication to German made her change over. She was outraged to discover that it addressed her as ‘du’ rather than ‘Sie’. You will doubtless be relieved to hear that in French it always addressed her as ‘Vous’.

Monday, April 12, 2021

The great day of her 18th birthday dawned. It was the mother of all Mondays as the boys went back to physical school for the first time since Christmas. Excitingly, we were all to be allowed outside our 5km zone (either county wide or 20kms from home whichever is the greater – as someone who comes from one of the largest counties in Ireland – it takes the guts of 3 hours to drive from west to the east – and lives in one of the smallest – about 5 minutes west to east – it’s a source of abiding bitterness) – there was much rejoicing re the latter if not the former.

The paper had on opposite pages two enormous pictures of women – Linda Doyle, first female Provost of Trinity College and Rachel Blackmore first female jockey to win the Grand National and I was quite pleased, I have to say.

Town was much busier than it has been and in the course of my commute I ran into a couple of acquaintances which hasn’t happened in a while.

Herself arrived home from school in great form with an enormous number of presents from her friends including this bag which one of them made. Aren’t the young people talented all the same?

We had another birthday cake and champagne after dinner. You’re only 18 the once. Her father and I gave her some book bundles from Books Upstairs and she seemed pretty pleased. Her aunt and uncle in London sent money and a book.

All in all, notwithstanding that it was her second lock down birthday, she seemed pretty happy.

Tuesday, April 13, 2021

Mr. Waffle’s lunch was interrupted by the cat coming into the kitchen with a live mouse in her jaws but otherwise the day was uneventful. The child benefit people wrote with impressive promptness to tell me that herself, having turned 18, is now off their books and the health insurance people sent her her own health insurance card. Small thrills.

Wednesday, April 14, 2021

For the first time in a long time there was no one in the house. Inevitably a delivery arrived (the boys’ presents for their sister’s birthday from their aunt – are you with me?) but the neighbours kindly took it in. Mr. Waffle was able to visit his mother in the nursing home for the first time in ages. Although she is, happily, vaccinated, he is not and he had to be swathed in PPE to get in so not entirely successful as he was certainly unrecognisable and inaudible to her.

My brother texted me that an older cousin had died suddenly. It was a real shock. She was only in her 60s. And, of course, no possibility of going to the funeral. It is depressing.

I am being tortured by people in Cork enjoying their new found freedom, travelling all over the county and putting the resulting pictures on Instagram.

Michael is reading “Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell” and loving it. It is very gratifying to recommend a book to someone and have that person love it. Particularly if the person is a child of yours and the book is a long one with a lot of details to discuss. All the others are hating our detailed dinner time discussions but Michael and I are delighted with ourselves.

There have been complaints about the kitchen bins and their ineffective foot pedals for some time so I bought two new bins in champagne (yes, this is a bin colour) and spent more than I thought possible on bins. They work pretty well though and the troops are pleased.

By the by, the package that had to be delivered next door in the morning contained cool sweatshirts for the boys. My sister is by far the biggest present giver to all of my children. Mr. Waffle and I used to try to compete but now we just relax and say, “Your best presents will be from your aunt.”

Aside – are we missing hairdressers? Very much indeed.

Thursday, April 15, 2021

Now that all five of us have to shower in the morning, bathroom time is at a premium. I went scooting up saying “I’ll only be a minute.” I sang as I went up, “She’s like the wind…” and I heard Michael through the ceiling saying gloomily to his brother, “She’s not like the wind.” Indeed.

Friday, April 16, 2021

Mr. Waffle found ants in the kitchen. Why is our house a haven for vermin of all kind with exciting seasonal variety? Please don’t answer that question.

I bought a hamper from the Lismore Food company at Christmas and, in a moment of weakness signed up to their mailing list. Lads, it’s the best mailing list I’ve ever signed up to. They send excellent, easy to make recipes. I made their Crunchie and it was amazing. No favours, other inducements etc. were given for this recommendation. More’s the pity.

Saturday, April 17, 2021

An absolutely beautiful day. We’d arranged to meet the cousins out in Dun Laoghaire (two households are now allowed to meet outside, hurrah!). It was our first time outside out 5kms and I was delighted. Everyone else in Dublin appeared to have the same idea and the traffic was dreadful but it was worth it. Herself got a flight voucher for her 18th birthday from her uncle and aunt which was lovely and although it’s apparently valid for 5 years, I’m hoping she’ll be able to use it before then.

We had arranged to talk to our French friends for the Princess’s birthday and the carefully set up zoom call had to be done in the car as we were yet again caught in traffic as everyone who had gone out to the seaside to enjoy the sunshine tried to get home again. Their daughter is going to do a college course which involves a year in London, a year in Berlin and a year in Madrid. If all goes according to plan, she and the Princess may be in England at the same time which would be nice. All the parents are very excited about this; the girls showed moderate enthusiasm.

Sunday, April 18, 2021

Neighbours from across the road got turf on a roll for their garden and offered the leftovers to the rest of the road so we scooted out and got four rolls. It’s heavy stuff. I hope it will take in our garden and give us reasonable grass instead of bald patches. More middle aged thrills.

I want out to visit my friend in Skerries and we had a long walk around the beach and the town and it was pretty nice I have to say even though the weather was chilly (the sea was full of people swimming and paddle boarding and generally messing around – dry robes abounded). It was pleasing, firstly because it was well outside 5kms and secondly I was meeting another person outside the family circle. Delighted with myself. Oh I do hope that the end of Covid is nigh.

*This translates from the Irish as “You deserve these results” and is one of the standard comments for our children’s reports so I have seen it a lot over the years. As Mr. Waffle says, it can be a double-edged sword.

Easter!

7 April, 2021
Posted in: Belgium, Boys, Cork, Daniel, Dublin, Family, Ireland, Michael, Mr. Waffle, Princess, Siblings

Monday March 29, 2021

We persist in watching “Charité” a German TV series with German subtitles (for added effort). It’s set in the 1880s and its about a hospital in Berlin. It’s hard going and despite my friend who speaks excellent German reassuring me that there is lots of useful domestic vocabulary we are all struggling to see how herself will work the word “Kaiserschnitt” into her German oral.

The evenings feel delightfully long now that the clocks have gone back.

Monday evening is forage night (everyone makes his/her own dinner from the fridge contents – don’t judge) and Daniel usually makes himself pizza. He’s got very handy at making the dough. He said to me as he kneaded, “I couldn’t find the yeast so I’m going to try without.” At one level my children astonish me with their competence, at another level, not so much. We found the yeast.

Tuesday, March 30, 2021

There is a new announcement about the very slow lifting of Covid restrictions. Nothing is changing before April 12 when we may be able to go as far as 10kms from home.

A very expensive Easter hamper from a nice hotel was advertised to me on instagram and, reader, I bought it.

Wednesday, March 31, 2021 – Spy Wednesday

The bathroom door broke. I’m not sure whether that constitutes an emergency in Covid times but we had a man in to fix it all the same. Apparently it took ages according to Mr. Waffle and the kids who were all confined to their work spaces for the duration of his visit while I was off in the office. He put it back opening the other way (at our request) and I am delighted with the increased feeling of spaciousness. To be clear, the bathroom remains tiny.

My camellia has finally produced several flowers. I am unreasonably delighted.

We got a notification that there was a Covid case in the school. What would once have been shocking is now a matter of general indifference. Though not a great sign with only two of the six years back in school.

The Government got into trouble in the matter of children’s shoes. Although initially shoes were deemed non-essential retail, now children’s shoes can be purchased in person and an appointment made for fitting. It appears that the Government were nervous about the surprisingly significant role children’s shoes play in Irish politics.

The neighbourhood whatsapp group started to spiral out of control following some vandalism incidents. To my lasting admiration, one of the neighbours called out the language being used. Everyone is back to asking whether anyone knows a good plumber; how to keep the road clean and virtual Easter egg hunts. A relief.

Thursday, April 1, 2021 – Holy Thursday

The first day of my Easter holidays and April’s fool day. I failed to fool herself or Daniel but I did persuade Mr. Waffle that the new bathroom door had come off its hinges. As I pointed out to herself, the relief made it net hugely enjoyable for him. She was unsure. So was he.

Herself spent the morning crafting an application for a summer internship (she is not optimistic but you never know) and imagining a world where the Leaving Cert was over. Then she and I had a very satisfactory urban plunge. We went to Fallon and Byrne (food); Marks and Spencer (more food); Sheridan’s (cheese) and Clement and Pekoe (tea) which were pretty much the only places open. In the course of lock down I have been regularly reminded of this line from Alistair Horne’s book “The Siege of Paris”:

“When in October a copy of the Journal De Rouen was somehow smuggled into the city, and reprinted in extenso, Child remarked that ‘whoever had said 3 months ago that a Provincial paper a fortnight old arriving in Paris would cause a sensation would have been laughed at; however such was the case’.”

Thursday is property supplement day in the Irish Times and even by the generally florid style of this supplement the following line stood out:

“Central to the room is an on-trend cottagecore scrubbed pine table.”

Cottagecore indeed.

Friday, April 2, 2021 -Good Friday

It has been an objective with me since lock down 1 to cycle the length of the canals which, more or less, encircle the city. It was a beautiful day and Mr. Waffle and I set forth to see what could be done. We largely achieved my objective although we did have a brief diversion when we ended up following the Dodder rather than the canal. While commenting on the strangeness of seaweed in the canal; a curve; and a silted up island in the middle we remained convinced that we were on the right track until we saw a sign saying River Dodder in Ballsbridge.

We stopped off on Wilton Terrace in a small but pleasant park filled with deck chairs and a coffee van. It was a private park and though, in theory, I feel quite uncomfortable with that, in practice it was pretty pleasant. I was ravenous and went off to the van to purchase tea and a snack but Mr. Waffle tactfully reminded me that it was Good Friday and I’d already had my two collations, so I restrained myself and had a cup of black tea only. Not entirely satisfactory.

Slightly related: herself tells me that plastic surgeons call the two lines between my eyebrows the “angry 11s”. Happily they are not visible in this picture of me relaxing in the private sector deck chair – taken by my husband. On the minus side, all of my chins are visible.

I was pretty pleased with myself when we got home, though exhausted from our epic trek.

My 91 year old aunt in Cork got her second Covid jab, so that is a relief.

Saturday, April 3, 2021

The very expensive hamper I ordered did not appear. I was pretty nervous as it contained our Easter Sunday lunch but I got a series of soothing emails and messages and it eventually arrived. It was pretty swish, people.

Mr. Waffle spent much of the day trying to make hot cross buns. He had huge success last year but this year, they just would not rise for him. As he said bitterly at the end of his efforts, “I’ve merged two traditions by creating the Passover unleavened bun.”

A friend of Mr. Waffle’s rang to ask whether herself would be willing to do some translation work for him – from French to English. She was delighted and has already mentally spent the generous fee several times.

It was time to yet again the deploy the house cleaning rota. God, we all hate it. But it’s effective.

We did not have takeaway night on Friday as it was Good Friday and it just seemed a bit odd, so we had it on Saturday. The children had pizza and the grown-ups a meal kit from Oliver Dunne. I was pretty impressed. It had, hands down, the best and most straightforward instructions of any meal kit we’ve got. The food was good and it was delivered to the door in a box not a lot larger than a pizza box. In fairness, they have the thing down to a fine art.

Sunday, April 4, 2021 – Easter Sunday

Herself was up at the crack of dawn organising an Easter egg hunt for the boys. They love her Easter egg hunts. The clues are always just right – enjoyably hard. For example, one of this year’s clues had a Caesar cipher which I had never heard of before but which they seemed to know well.

She and I then spent a happy couple of hours setting up the table and cooking our hamper contents. A gendered space I fear. She had a vision of renaissance extravagance for the table:

I was more into replicating cute bunny napkin arrangements I’d seen on the internet.

We were thinking next time we might even iron the table cloth. The gentlemen of the party, had a drink with the chefs/creative geniuses:

And then, warned that they needed to admire, they were escorted to the kitchen:

I must say the hamper was amazing. They promised enough food for six and they more than made good on that promise. There was the most enormous beef Wellington which is likely to be with us all week. All of the courses were superb – I would definitely do something like this again for Easter. Although our poor vegetarian had to make do with a Marks and Spencer offering for mains. Oh well.

After lunch we went for a walk round the block and dropped into the church. It is so odd not to be going to mass at Easter though much less odd than last year.

We talked to my sister, brother and aunt in Cork by Skype. My sister is the major Easter egg donor in our house so we had an unboxing ceremony for her. She seemed to enjoy it. Not as much as we did.

Monday, 5 April, 2021

Herself was plunged deep into her studies. I decided that Mr. Waffle, the boys and I would explore on our bikes a hitherto unknown (to us) bit of the large park nearby. We were only half way there when it started to drizzle. We went in to a smaller park near our house instead and played frisbee in the drizzle which slowly and determinedly changed into snow. Not a perfect outing.

We continued our German TV watching. We switched to a show about a school on the grounds that the vocabulary might be more useful. However, we all pined for “Charité” and wondered how the tuberculin vaccine was going to work out [spoiler alert – not well] so we have decided to abandon the school show and work out how herself can usefully integrate late 19th century medical vocabulary into her German oral. I found myself reading up on Wikipedia about the characters in the show. Three of them won the Nobel prize for medicine. This got me thinking about how Germany was a powerhouse of science and medicine. When my mother went to Germany in the late 50s to do post-graduate work in chemistry, it was considered a fantastic opportunity. Ten years later when she met my father, German was still the language of a lot of scientific papers (they met because the college librarian suggested to my father that my mother might be able to help him with translating a German paper). I wonder is Germany still a world leader in science and, if not, why not? When did English take over from German as the language of scientific research? I daresay google knows.

Tuesday, 6 April, 2021

I’m still on my Easter holidays but there is nothing to do. I did some German practice with herself. My own Leaving Cert German is coming back to me a bit but, even though my Dutch is almost entirely non-existent *, I find myself regularly leading herself astray by using Dutch expressions instead of German ones. I read somewhere that when you are struggling to find a word in a foreign language, often the word will come to you in your weakest foreign language – this certainly seems to be true of me.

Tomorrow is the last day of my Easter holidays and I am not as sorry as I generally am which is a sad reflection on the state of things.

How was your own Easter?

*Despite a good year of classes and living in a Dutch speaking country – in my defence I lived in the French speaking part; Flemish people to a man speak far better English than I speak Dutch so I could only practice on young children and people tend to look askance at that. You would think that as Dutch is the child of English and German** I had a natural advantage, but yet I made no progress.

**An American friend of mine once shouted at Dutch radio, “Come on man, try a little harder, you’re almost at English”- I know what he meant.

Another One Down

28 March, 2021
Posted in: Belgium, Boys, Daniel, Dublin, Ireland, Michael, Mr. Waffle, Princess

Monday, March 22, 2021

I’ve got nothing. No recollection of what happened on yet another Monday in lock down.

Tuesday, March 23, 2021

An elderly woman who was born on our road and has been a very active member of the local residents’ association went into hospital a while back. Mr. Waffle heard that she has cancer and then had a stroke so she is going into a nursing home and not coming home from hospital. It’s so sad. She was always in her front garden, sweeping the path or hanging over the hedge chatting to someone. And when she dies, we won’t even be able to go to the funeral. Very depressing.

On Daniel’s Tuesday course, he and his group did something in 70 lines of code whereas all the other teams had at least 120 lines. Apparently fewer lines is better. I tell you this lest you too make the same kind of tactless remark as me based on an understanding that surely more is better.

Herself went to the orthodontist and he has finally, finally said that he is going to take off her braces in June. This has been a complete marathon. I really regret going in to the process in the first place. Her teeth were fine really. I blame the Americans.

We watched a German film about the devil’s daughter who is staying with a nice family and trying to tempt their teenage daughter. Lots of school vocabulary, very speedy dialogue which was challenging but good for all of us.

Wednesday, March 24, 2021

The State Examinations Commission issued new exam guidelines and apparently, inter alia, the Shakespeare question in English will be optional this year. Herself was delighted and she likes Shakespeare. She had two outstanding King Lear essays and felt that now the teacher would no longer want her to complete them (spoiler alert: the teacher still wants her to do the essays).

I felt a bit unwell when I got home from work so took myself up to bed at 8.30. Poor Michael had made a very nice risotto for dinner and was cast into understandable gloom when I merely pushed it round my plate and then departed for bed. Herself said reproachfully that if I had Covid, she wouldn’t be able to do her orals.

Thursday, March 25, 2021 – My father’s birthday

I woke up feeling fine (not Covid, then). This would have been my father’s 96th birthday. I thought about him a lot all day. A friend sent me a card offering perpetual masses for my father and mother and I was amazed how pleased I was. Am I going to become obsessed by religion in my old age?

At school, herself did mock Irish and German orals. The former was more satisfactory than the latter. Her lovely German teacher, looked out the window during the class and said, “Oh I see a bunny in the yard, let’s go outside and see if we can all see him.” She’d bought them all Easter eggs and put them in the yard. This class of 17/18 year olds were delighted which is quite sweet.

Daniel’s GAA coaches ran a zoom games session and they played 2 truths and a lie and he had such a good time. Poor Dan, fun is in short supply these days. I am very grateful to the coaches who organised the whole thing. They have day jobs and I can’t imagine that spending time organising an evening of online games was great fun for them.

Friday, March 26, 2021 – Last day of school before the Easter holidays

Herself had her actual Leaving Cert French oral. She sat 2 metres from the examiner with two sheets of perspex between them, the windows open and both of them wearing masks so I think risk of infection was low. In fairness, her French is good so it all passed off peacefully and she was glad to have the first real exam experience out of the way.

I had a good long Skype call with my friend in Brussels. They’re about to go into lock down again and she is quietly resigned.

I ordered from Uno Mas for dinner. It’s a sister restaurant to Etto which I love but I just didn’t like it as much. I mean it was nice but assembly was tough and nearly floored me. Highlight was waiting to pick it up and singing along with herself to Dolly Parton (“Here you come again” – how does she know this number? Dolly is very popular with the young people, it transpires).

Daniel, Michael and I watched “The Return of the King” which we all enjoyed hugely. Mr. Waffle drifted in and out making slightly snarky comments. He is not a fantasy fan. We had our revenge when he thought it was surely over and there was a final half hour of return to the Shire.

Saturday, March 27, 2021

A day of high drama. Herself came into my room at 9.15 fully of adrenaline in advance of her Leaving Cert oral Irish exam. We sang Dolly Parton (reliving the previous day’s excitement) and she danced around the room. Both her brothers came to the bedroom door having been inadvertently awoken by our antics at this early hour, “Either the singing or the dancing but not both,” said Daniel wearily.

I dropped her to school. She was nervous but she’s good at Irish and she was well prepared. She did the oral and it was the exam of dreams. It went really, really well. She noticed as she was leaving the room that the recording was only ten minutes. She was surprised and raised it with the teachers. It turned out that there was a fault in the recording software and it had cut everyone off after ten minutes. All of the earlier candidates had to be recalled and she had to do her exam again. Her Irish teacher said that it was the worst thing that he had ever heard of happening in an oral exam and he would use her as a cautionary tale for future generations of students. She was not very comforted by this. Anyway, she did the exam again and it went fine but not as well as the first time. The exam recordings have to be sent off to the State Examinations Commission and, apparently, they only mark what they get so it was really fortunate that she spotted the problem as if she hadn’t everyone in the school would have been marked down. She was a bit wrung by the whole thing.

I took to her to Lidl and Tesco to buy Easter tat: thin on the ground. I thought she might find something she would like but no joy. There weren’t even any mini eggs. We made an Easter wreath out of bendy branches and I stuck it up in the hall.

Herself picked the film night film. It was a Senegalese film called “Atlantique” which was largely in Wolof and won a prize in Cannes. The children really enjoyed it. I want to be the kind of person who finds a film in Wolof about the situation of African emigrants fleeing to Europe in death trap boats ideal Saturday night viewing but I’m not. I found it hard going. Before the twist, I dozed slightly. I woke up after the twist and it did improve but, lads, I can’t recommend.

Sunday March 28, 2021 Palm Sunday

I’d completely forgotten that the clocks were going forward (it’s bright outside at 8pm as I write). At least we avoided trooping in late for 11.30 mass. Mr. Waffle and I went for a walk and got rained on but it was not as unpleasant as that sounds. We passed a church with piles of palm outside the door so we picked some up.

Top tip on making your Easter wreath: make sure your bendy tree is not one whose leaves die after a short time indoors. This was the wreath yesterday, maybe not terrific but, you know, ok:

Today, alas, it was dead and positively funereal looking. Back to the drawing board:

My apple tree branch continues to be a source of delight though, so there’s that.

Update me on your own week, ah go on, do.

Hail Glorious Saint Patrick

21 March, 2021
Posted in: Boys, Daniel, Dublin, Family, Ireland, Michael, Mr. Waffle, Princess, Siblings

Monday, March 15, 2021

I got an exciting package from the relatives in London containing a Cork poster for my birthday. Very thrilling.

We were all very excited to puzzle out this extraordinary translation of washing instructions on a new scarf that herself got. My favourite touch is the apostrophe in necessaire.

Translation below.

The fifth years are back in school and herself is outraged having very much enjoyed having the building open to sixth years only.

Tuesday, March 16, 2021

I took the day off work as it’s a quiet week with Patrick’s Day in the middle. It was a beautiful day and Michael and I went for a cycle in the park in the morning. Mr. Waffle and I cycled out to Chapelizod and had a look at the weir in the afternoon. It was an excellent outing by pandemic standards.

One of the boys’ teachers from primary school rang me out of the blue to say that the church where they were baptised was trying to get in touch with us. Odd. I had a grand old chat with the teacher anyhow. She was asking after all of the children which was nice; she herself is absolutely delighted to be back in the classroom even though she has junior infants this year and I can’t help but imagine social distancing must be difficult. Anyhow, I contacted the church – they had lost the boys’ baptismal certs but with some information on dates, they managed to locate them. So much for the Catholic Church’s extraordinary record keeping or, alternatively, it’s an impressively elaborate scam to get the boys’ data.

That evening we went into town and looked at the buildings lit up in green for Patrick’s Day. Low levels of enthusiasm but it was something a little different.

I made everyone listen to “Hail Glorious St. Patrick” in the car on the way home.

Wednesday, March 17, 2021 – St. Patrick’s Day

After the excitement of Tuesday, this was a quieter day. I thought about my father saying that when he was a little boy, the first time he really understood the passage of time was when he put his St. Patrick’s Day badge in a drawer and then a whole year passed and he was able to use it again. Not perhaps one of his best anecdotes but, it transpires, unforgettable.

Mr. Waffle, Daniel and I went to the Botanic gardens. I mean, fine, spring has sprung and half of Dublin was sitting on the grass enjoying the fine weather. There were pictures out from a photographic competition and I think it’s fair to say, that we were all more excited about this than we would have been in peace time.

Herself is preparing for her various oral exams and is concentrating on her German oral. We watched a dreadful cookery show called “Wer kann, der kann” as practice. Would not recommend although I am slightly intrigued by this review from the Hindu that I found online.

In the midst of it the cat started making the most appalling growling noise in the kitchen. Herself went to investigate and found that the cat had caught a mouse. Mr. Waffle was out and herself, reading the situation quite correctly, decided that I was useless and ran to put on her shoes, get a plastic bag and dispose of the mouse corpse. When she got back it was to see the horrifying sight of the cat bolting the mouse down starting at the tail. On the plus side, it was definitely a mouse and not a rat. Oh Lord, this is the year of vermin. The cat was delighted with herself.

Thursday, March 18, 2021

Daniel was on dinner and he decided to make pizza. I picked up some burrata at lunch time at considerable expense to make salad to accompany the pizza. Mr. Waffle picked up some Lidl mozzarella for the topping and Daniel was a bit dubious about its quality. In fact, it was fine. Then Mr. Waffle took some of my beautifully curated salad, “I see what you mean about the Lidl mozzarella,” said he, “It isn’t really very nice.” I was fit to be tied.

Herself pointed out to me that I am not a restful companion and I keep hopping up and saying, “Right” and putting them all to work. This arose when I got up after dinner and said, “Right!” and all the children moaned, “Not ‘right'” which I found perplexing until it was explained to me.

Friday, March 19, 2021 – Mr. Waffle’s Birthday

Mr. Waffle is a hard man to buy for but he seemed reasonably content with his presents. His sister in London starred by getting him a signed copy of a book he was already interested in. She knows the author. The glamour.

Dan had to go to the physio and Mr. Waffle took him (his knee is a bit sore but it’s not serious you will be glad to hear). While they were gone, I sprang into action, taking from their hiding place the ingredients to make the classic rice krispie birthday cake. I made it, I washed up after it and I hid the cake before he came home. You can imagine my ire when Mr. Waffle noticed that there was an extra half pack of rice krispies on the shelf. Sigh.

Mr. Waffle and I took our faithful Pevsner guide and continued our exploration of Dublin. He quite fancied exploring Temple Bar. Normally he loathes Temple Bar as it is full of tourists but he thought he might like it in lock down. He was wrong. It was the most spectacularly depressing outing. It’s become a day time hang out for Dublin’s homeless population. There were people who looked really sick from drugs pale, yellowish skinny faces; people drinking in corners and people wandering aimlessly making quips about us walking around with our guidebook (we were quip worthy, I concede). Honestly, it felt like some kind of scene from one of those post-apocalyptic films; it was really sad but also, not relaxing.

When we got home, herself had returned from school. She did a mock French oral at school. It went well.

I had ordered a birthday dinner in from Etto and it was really excellent. And then we had the rice krispie cake. What’s not to love?

We also talked to the Londoners who had moved house that day and so had actual, live, bona fide real news. We got a tour via Skype of the new house but I can’t wait to visit in real life.

Saturday, March 20, 2021

The cleaning rota was deployed again. We all hate it but most of us think it’s worth it.

Herself and myself have started watching a German series on Netflix called “Zeit der Geheimnisse”. Honestly, I think it would be confusing in English but we are dutifully watching in German with German subtitles (oral prep) and all the twists and turns are definitely keeping us on our toes.

Ireland won in the rugby beating the old enemy, perfidious Albion. Daniel was pleased. My brother watched it in Cork with two friends who have been vaccinated. This is in breach of the rules but I haven’t the heart to blame him.

For film night, I had planned to bring to the audience a three hour epic (and indeed had paid Mr. Waffle’s money to google play to rent it) but dinner was late and I switched horses mid-stream and rented “Little Miss Sunshine” and put that on instead. Everyone loved it and came in at a handy 1hr 42 minutes. It came out in 2006 and Mr. Waffle swears he has never seen it before but who did I see it with then leaving him to mind our 3 children under four? A mystery.

Sunday, March 21, 2021 – Vernal Equinox

I have no idea what I did today other than a lot of walking around the block. I see that a certain anti-lockdown spirit is animating local fly posting.

I also agreed to play a board game with the boys. They were merciful to their father and me and the game they picked was short and not very complicated, it’s all we’re able for. Herself and myself had more of our Netflix German secrets show. Very tiring; she had to get out a piece of paper and draw a family tree for us to follow it.

Let me have your lock down news and, pretty specific this one, if you have a recommended series in German on Netflix, let me know.