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Consumer pleasures

6 August, 2005
Posted in: Belgium

She’s very intrepid, my friend the heart surgeon. When we were in college she spent the Summers travelling around Africa, travelling around South America and driving to the south of Spain in a car from which you could see the road by glancing down at the floor. The rust spots were touched up with white wall paint from her parents’ garage. Don’t ever buy a Fiat Panda.

She has just moved back to Vermont after a spell in Ireland and, given her past form, it was no surprise to learn that she drove to Toronto recently to visit a friend. Leaving her husband to labour in the local A&E ward, herself and her 6 month old baby spent about 12 hours in the car. When they got to Toronto it broke down. The Heart Surgeon and her friend’s husband replaced the battery (this is what she’s like) but she was under strict instructions not to use  the airconditioner, radio, fan etc. on the return journey. Lovely. She also loaded up with some IKEA furniture because, hey, why not. She points out (something I always believed to be true) that it took a full two days to assemble her furniture and heart surgery is far easier.

We’re going to IKEA on Monday. Wish us luck.

Comments
poggle

on 08 August 2005 at 11:12

Don’t do it waffley – you’ll only end up with too many tealights and candles. You will.

sus

on 08 August 2005 at 16:22

I don?t care what people say. I love IKEA. I only ever bought one thing there – my trusty double bed. It served me well for a year, then I sold it to friends who brought it to the US and it is now on its way to Italy with them.
Hope you are having fun with all the little nuts and bolts now…

belgianwaffle

on 08 August 2005 at 20:03

Negrito, my nerve failed me, we’re going tomorrow instead.
Pog, thank heavens you reminded me in time. I nearly forgot to add candles to the list.
Sus, that’s because you only went there once…

Weighty matters

31 July, 2005
Posted in: Mr. Waffle, Twins

Me: I bought a new dress.  Do you like it? Try to marry truth and tact.

Him: It’s ideal for around the house.

I went for a scan during the week and tested the doctor’s scales, in the interests of everyone’s happiness, we have no weighing scales at home. For your information, the twins now weigh 1.3kgs each. This is average for a single baby at this stage. This means I am twice as large as a normal 7 month pregnant person.  Are you scared?

Me: Do you know what I weigh now?

Him: No.

Me: 71 kilos

Him: Well, you are pregnant with twins etc.

Me: What do you weigh?

Him: You’d really rather not know.

Me: TELL ME.

Him: 72 kilos.

Princess (addressing herself to stereo which is playing musical backing to Ella Fitzgerald): Tu joues très bien monsieur.

Comments
Minkleberry

on 01 August 2005 at 12:49

I could tell you how much I weigh and it would make you feel slender and positively sylph-like- but then I’d have to kill you xx 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

poggle

on 02 August 2005 at 10:57

Mr W is brilliant – ‘it’s alright for round the house’ indeed. I can see why you married him. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

StarCorner

on 02 August 2005 at 22:19

Like Minkleberry I could do the same! I’m just seriously hoping my thyroid function is out of kilter else I have some serious dieting and exercising to do. As a pregnant mum of twins consider yourself extremely sylph like! 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

dmts

on 03 August 2005 at 07:28

Are you anorexic? 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

belgianwaffle

on 04 August 2005 at 12:41

Stroppy, of course there are no right answers, but he SHOULD have known that. Um, yes, pog. Minks, StarCorner, you know that I measure 163cms in my stockinged feet. I am short alas whereas I am sure that you are both tall and willowy.
Yes, HJB, I worry… 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

Minkleberry

on 05 August 2005 at 18:28

Belg, I love you for thinking I am tall and willowy. Sadly, I am 161 centimetres tall. I envy your extra 2- What does the world look like from up there? 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

KateEvans

on 05 August 2005 at 20:20

Well, I’m 173cms and never you mind how many kilos and the ultrasound tech said today that my baby was sizewise ‘above average’ and that’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it, dammit. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

belgianwaffle

on 06 August 2005 at 12:51

Minks, you sound tall and willowy and I’m sure it’s all in the mind. That’s what I try to tell myself anyway.
KE, that sounds like an excellent excuse. With the added merit that it may even be true. 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

Sarcastic Journalist

(Homepage)

on 08 August 2005 at 17:13

I think that if I were you, I’d pretend that it just means I can eat THAT MUCH MORE. ���

belgianwaffle

on 08 August 2005 at 20:02

SJ, now you’re talking! 0
Sweetie(s) given ���

]]>

Risking life and limb

30 July, 2005
Posted in: Family, Travel

I received the email below from my father-in-law, who along with m-i-l is hoping to join us in France. It’s all worry, worry, worry.

“We still want to go to France very much, but some concerns emerge. What are the possibilities of being shot. The hunting season in France has been brought forward by a week, and an outfit called something like the Ligue pour la Protection des Oiseaux predicts 9000 tonnes of lead pellets, propelled out of 250 million cartridges will soon be whistling around our ears, with particular reference to duck-shooting in the Somme estuary. Being blown up. A newly-created public park in Lille (seehow they are targeting us) has found to be home to over 200 WWIhand-grenades, each capable of maiming within a 25 metre range. The excuse is that the contractors landscaping the park trucked in topsoil from the Flanders area, a lame excuse to me (nopun intended). Being misled. In Paris, once again in our theatre of operations(see how the military jargon so readily overwhelms one in times like these) unidentified agents have been pasting convincing Latin translations of street names over street signs, appropriately enough  throughout theLatin Quarter (eg Vicus Scholarium instead of Rue des Ecoles). Prime suspects are militant Latinists – a new one on me -from the local Tridentine church.

    Mother-in-law continues to improve, but I am not sure
    that she is up for full-scale counter-terrorist and counter-intelligence operations.

    Can you advise soonest, please?

    Worried,

    Monkstown”

    Comments
    negrito

    on 31 July 2005 at 12:06

    Eheh, seen from Paris the worse thing you risk is rain on the head ! 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    belgianwaffle

    on 31 July 2005 at 21:27

    Loc, only very mildly delusional and, yes, jovial.
    Negrito, I can’t help feeling that this is a very real risk though… 0
    Sweetie(s) given

    negrito

    on 31 July 2005 at 23:39

    Lol, If you need Gritoland security guards just let me know !!! 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    Friar Tuck

    on 02 August 2005 at 18:02

    Suggest the American solution… carry an AK-47 with you at all times. ���

    belgianwaffle

    on 04 August 2005 at 12:41

    Oooh, security. Thank you gentlemen!

    The genetic code

    29 July, 2005
    Posted in: Princess

    The Princess is very like her Daddy. Everyone says that she looks just like him. She acts just like him too. She is the only toddler who is VERY cautious. The other day her father
    offered to lift her up to walk along a wall and she looked at him as though he was mad and said reprovingly “c’est PAS un bonne idée, je peux tomber!”

    There is, however, one respect in which she very much resembles her mother and this is in her desire to communicate.  Constantly.  Her Dublin grandfather calls her Mademoiselle Blah Blah.  Already, she has realised how socially useful this can be (stop sniggering). On Sunday, a friend of Mr. Waffle’s came to lunch and during proceedings, the Princess and I had to depart to the bathroom. As she sat on her little pot she looked up at me anxiously “Mummy, who talks to Luca?” “Daddy will talk to him sweetheart”.  I must say, she looked distinctly dubious at the proposition that her father and his friend could keep up a conversation without our assistance; you have to sympathise.

    I have explained to her that when her father is trying to give directions or read maps in the car, she must stop talking for
    everyone’s sake. She finds this deeply unsatisfactory and now every time she sees a map she wails dolefully “mais moi,
    je veux PARLER”. That’s my girl.

    Comments
    NorahSplog

    on 29 July 2005 at 11:29

    And the princess climbs ever higher in my estimation. 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    StarCorner

    on 29 July 2005 at 18:56

    What a chuckle I had at today’s post!!! Go girl princess!!! 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    sus

    on 29 July 2005 at 19:31

    Fantastic! She has a great future ahead of her. 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    belgianwaffle

    on 30 July 2005 at 07:27

    Hey, Bobble, Norah, Star, Sus, does this make me correct in my deduction that all bloggers are great talkers? 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    StarCorner

    on 31 July 2005 at 10:56

    I think your deduction may well be correct Mrs Waffle!!! 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    belgianwaffle

    on 31 July 2005 at 21:27

    And a good thing too, eh? 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    poggle

    on 02 August 2005 at 10:54

    We already knew that poor mite is genius, waffle. This merely confirms it. 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    belgianwaffle

    on 04 August 2005 at 12:38

    Thank you Pog and a warm welcome back from exotic foreign parts. 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    ]]>

    Happy Anniversary

    28 July, 2005
    Posted in: Mr. Waffle

    This day, a mere four years ago, Mr. Waffle and I were married.  It was a beautiful day and we had a wonderful time. And then we were married. Very odd.  It’s taken me some time to get used to the idea but, you know, I like it. Though, of course, at the time, I didn’t realise that it would entail changing my name to Waffle. And now we have a little family. Isn’t this even odder? Mr. Waffle is, obviously, the world’s best husband and father. I know this because the Princess keeps telling me “My Daddy great” and also because every time we see my mother and he leaves the room to do something she says, sotto voce, “Gosh, he’s marvellous, isn’t he?”

    Of course, I know this also because I picked him out and persuaded him that it would be a good idea to marry me and I am NEVER wrong. And also he is taking me to an expensive
    restaurant for lunch. And furthermore he rose with the lark this morning and took the Princess to her creche by tram
    while I lay indolently in bed. And because of the thousands of little things he does to try to make my life perfect. And also the big things. And because he loves us both.

    Comments

    dmts

    on 28 July 2005 at 13:19

    My mother used to do that ‘isn’t he marvellous’ bit too – I always felt the sub-text was ‘why on earth did he marry you?’
    Many felicitations to you and Mr Waffle (and the princess and the baking waffles) 2
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    Locotes

    on 28 July 2005 at 15:24

    Awww…bless. While I’m sure if our paths had crossed on Pana one day, that things would have been quite different, I’m very happy for you.
    😉 1
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    Minkleberry

    on 28 July 2005 at 15:38

    Crikey- I can’t take real heartfelt sentiment in this condition. I’m in floods here.
    Congratulations xx 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    belgianwaffle

    on 29 July 2005 at 10:44

    Thanks Norah. Heather, 2 sweeties, I’m overwhelmed and also completely in agreement re mothers. But we’re just paranoid right?
    Loc, well, maybe but I think when I was last living in Cork, you were about 7, so possibly not. Ta for the sweetie.
    Minks, I am touched. I am also still hormonal, I weep at everything. I sympathise. 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    Locotes

    on 30 July 2005 at 08:54

    You left Cork when you were 3 years old?? My God, I’m shocked. 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    belgianwaffle

    on 31 July 2005 at 21:28

    Well, no, but you are really young, aren’t you? Sort of 25ish or something like that? 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    poggle

    on 02 August 2005 at 10:55

    Belated Happy Anniversary Missus …. 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    belgianwaffle

    on 04 August 2005 at 12:39

    Ta pog. 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    Locotes

    on 04 August 2005 at 22:01

    Well, yes…that was sort of the point of the subtle compliment I was paying you.
    Which promptly sailed right over your head.
    Ah well. 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    belgianwaffle

    on 06 August 2005 at 12:47

    But Loc, you’ve never, to your knowledge, seen me. Now if you had seen me walking down Pana and said to your friend, she can’t be a day over 25, THAT would be a compliment. 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    Locotes

    on 08 August 2005 at 14:06

    Oh please. As if a small detail like that makes a difference – I just KNOW that that’s the case. Trust me.Though incidentally, I think the first picture you used on your blog contained your good self – you shared the Princess’ wonderful locks if I remember correctly…
    …and you didn’t look a day over 25.

    Which I told a nearby friend.

    Who looked at me strangely admittedly… 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    belgianwaffle

    on 08 August 2005 at 20:04

    Locotes, you are brilliant. And of course correct. 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    Locotes

    on 09 August 2005 at 10:06

    We’re both just wonderful people – how marvelous life is. 0
    Sweetie(s) given ���

    ]]>

    Improving Mother-in-Law

    27 July, 2005
    Posted in: Family

    This arrived from my father-in-law yesterday: The suspect is definitely on the mend, with the medical team talking of a release into the tender mercy of her husband this coming week-end. Improved life signs include normal insatiable curiosity about other patients on the ward (sociological background, what the Polish girl thinks of working in MacDonalds in Tallaght etc) [see men do marry women like their mothers]. On balance this is a good sign. How small Dublin is – I was accosted in the supermarket today by a hill-running guy who is involved in mountain rescue to find him asking me “how is your wife?”. Apparently he was on call on the day in question and would have plodded up into the hills had not the helicopter boys scooped the pool
    beforehand.”

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